--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, laughinggull108 no_reply@... wrote:
--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, Xenophaneros Anartaxius anartaxius@
wrote:
--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, laughinggull108 no_reply@ wrote:
So true and don't either of you forget it! From now on, you have to go
through me to get to my sweet innocent Baby Krishna Ravi. If you wish to
respond to Him, you must ask me first. I'll then consult with Him in due
time to see if He would like to even pursue your line of discussion. If
He chooses not to, then no reason to even post your comments in the first
place. A very efficient and effective use of His precious time. And
please try to remember...
I understand that you, Laughinggull, are now manning the ticket counter
access to His Presence the Magisterial Royal Mahaswami Ravi Chivukula
Guruji Mahatmaraja, beneath whom I am not fit to sweep even His Toe Nail
Clippings. Pray tell upon what condition His Infiniteness might deign to
drop a few crumbs of His Holy and Benign Darshan in my unworthy direction.
Perhaps in a moment of His most offhand attention He would feel it barely
tolerable to pass a kernel of His Most High Wisdom through you to us most
thirsty and groveling, sycophantic worshipers of His Greatness.
Perhaps you could collect a few grains left over from one of His Chapatis,
that we could build a shrine to house them and perpetuate their Divine and
most Humble power.
Scenario: A beat up saffron-colored Ford Ranger mini-pickup truck with a
rickety wooden camper shell parked beside a clear-flowing river with a
flashing neon sign hooked up to a 12-volt battery that reads Water for
Sale. Leaning against the camper shell on the tailgate in his much too
tight, yet dapper, Shivaratri-best dhoti is our Laughing Protector of His
Holiness Raviji who appears to be either in samadhi or nodding off. (The
latter is probably the case since LPHHR's head occasionally drops suddenly
then quickly comes back up with a jerking motion.) Seeker Xeno warily
approaches while seekers Share and Steve maintain a relatively safe distance
about 50 yards away hidden in the lush vegetation growing along the river on
which seeker Share is busily munching and making soft cooing sounds. Seeker
Steve's eyes are focused on seeker Share, with an occasional glance towards
seeker Xeno, ever ready to jump in at a moment's notice should the slightest
danger present itself. A dry twig snaps loudly under seeker Xeno's
sandal-covered foot to which LPHHR awakens with a start muttering
...yes...mmm...yes...hare Ravi...mmm... as if caught between an erotic
dream and waking reality.
Seeker Xeno is the first to speak: Oh Laughing Protector and manner of the
Ticket Counter, I and my two seeker companions hiding back there in the
bushes have traveled long and far along this clear-flowing river and are most
thirsty for water. More importantly, and I can't speak for my two seeker
companions hiding back there in the bushes, I approach as a groveling,
sycophantic worshiper of His Greatness whose name is revered far and wide
throughout these lands of FFL, and desire greatly for just a few crumbs of
His Holy and Benign Darshan or maybe just a kernel of His Most High Wisdom
passed through you to me...uh, I mean us. Hey, seekers Share and Steve, if
you wanna get in on this, you better get up here now...
Slightly disheveled seekers Share and Steve, with sheepish grins on their
glistening faces, emerge from the bushes.
Fully-awakened (but not in the spiritual sense) LPHHR recognizing that he has
some shills...uh...potential clients speaks: Yes indeedy...step right
up...step right up all ye sincere seekers of transitory...uh...I mean
permanent RR. First things first however. Cool, clear, thirst-quenching water
is $2 per cup or I can let you have an entire quart for $10. So what will it
be my most parched and sincere seekers?
After a brief consultation among the three seeker companions from whom can be
heard seeker Xeno ...the cups are cheaper and seeker Share in her most
pouty voice ...but I want the quart!, seeker Xeno approaches and says:
We'll take two quarts. And by the way, what's RR?
The scene fades to black as the first strains of Amazing Grace play softly
in the background.
[to be continued...]
Scene fades in as the final strains of the gospel Just As I Am fade out
softly in the background.
Laughing Jelly Bean, formerly known as LPHHR, with a blissful smile on his
pudgy yet somewhat handsome face, slips a slightly fatter wallet into the folds
of his patched dhoti while the three seeker companions, seated on heavily worn
straw mats for a very, very reasonable $1 per mat per half hour, have contented
expressions on their faces as seeker Xeno drains the last few drops from his
quart of water and seeker Share finishes the quart that she and seeker Steve
