Sounds like you want to enable the noflood option in the mrouted.conf.
Flooding session data will speed up the starting/restarting the multicast
connection at the expense of bandwidth.
The next thing I would suggest is to dump the internal routing and cache
tables on both multicast routers to see
I have mrouted running on freebsd 4.7. I am routing
between two
private networks:
10.100.100.x - mrouted - 192.168.3.x
and I can see the multicast traffic on the client side
(192.168.3.x)
but the switch that connects the client side network
with the router
is getting flooded with the multicast