[ZION] Starts with F Gossip
This is the post that Natasha is keeping to herself. It will probably show up a week or two from now: I choose to discuss Gossip today. I tried this out on FAIR and got no response, so I'm sure ZION can do at least that well. I stumbled across a three part test for sharing information about people and sorting out what is appropriate to tell and what is gossip. You ask yourself these three simple questions: 1. Is this fact about so and so kind? 2. Do I have undisputable knowledge of it, in other words, is it true? 3. Does the person I'm planning to share this with have a need to know? Setting aside certain special relationships of a confidential or ethical nature (for example I can never share things that I learn in my law office about people, even if they are kind, true and someone might have a need to know. Likewise a nurse in the hospital has special ethical responsibilities for what she learns... etc.) But setting those things aside the test is that if you can answer yes to any two of the above you can share it. For example if it comes to your attention that so and so is pregnant. That may or may not be a kind thing depending upon the circumstances. If it's someone you know who has been aching for a child forever and your source is good (it's true) then you can share that happy news with others. But if this is about a 14 year old in your ward, you don't tell anyone else, unless that person has a special need to know. Build your own scenario, apply the test and then let me know about it, especially if you think of applications where the test doesn't work. I'm trying to figure out if it is reliable or not. That's right. For today G is for Gossip. Of course the best test is in Ephesians 4: 24 And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness. 25 Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of another 29 Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. 30 And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. Paul certainly emphasizes the truthfulness and kindness part of the test. The need to know part is just meant to deal with those rare special occasions when unkind things need to be shared. Tom // /// ZION LIST CHARTER: Please read it at /// /// http://www.zionsbest.com/charter.html /// / --^ This email was sent to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] EASY UNSUBSCRIBE click here: http://topica.com/u/?aaP9AU.bWix1n.YXJjaGl2 Or send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] TOPICA - Start your own email discussion group. FREE! http://www.topica.com/partner/tag02/create/index2.html --^
Re: [ZION] Starts with F Gossip
Gossip is cruel. It destroys lives. It damages self-esteem. It destroys friendships. It breaks up marriages. It weakens families. It is a fundamental violation of one of the Ten Commandments: Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor. If one hasn't got anything nice to say about someone, he ought to shut his trap. --JWR -- reply separator - Tom Matkin wrote: This is the post that Natasha is keeping to herself. It will probably show up a week or two from now: I choose to discuss Gossip today. I tried this out on FAIR and got no response, so I'm sure ZION can do at least that well. I stumbled across a three part test for sharing information about people and sorting out what is appropriate to tell and what is gossip. You ask yourself these three simple questions: 1. Is this fact about so and so kind? 2. Do I have undisputable knowledge of it, in other words, is it true? 3. Does the person I'm planning to share this with have a need to know? Setting aside certain special relationships of a confidential or ethical nature (for example I can never share things that I learn in my law office about people, even if they are kind, true and someone might have a need to know. Likewise a nurse in the hospital has special ethical responsibilities for what she learns... etc.) But setting those things aside the test is that if you can answer yes to any two of the above you can share it. For example if it comes to your attention that so and so is pregnant. That may or may not be a kind thing depending upon the circumstances. If it's someone you know who has been aching for a child forever and your source is good (it's true) then you can share that happy news with others. But if this is about a 14 year old in your ward, you don't tell anyone else, unless that person has a special need to know. Build your own scenario, apply the test and then let me know about it, especially if you think of applications where the test doesn't work. I'm trying to figure out if it is reliable or not. That's right. For today G is for Gossip. Of course the best test is in Ephesians 4: 24 And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness. 25 Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of another 29 Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. 30 And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: 32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. Paul certainly emphasizes the truthfulness and kindness part of the test. The need to know part is just meant to deal with those rare special occasions when unkind things need to be shared. Tom // /// ZION LIST CHARTER: Please read it at /// /// http://www.zionsbest.com/charter.html /// / // /// ZION LIST CHARTER: Please read it at /// /// http://www.zionsbest.com/charter.html /// / --^ This email was sent to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] EASY UNSUBSCRIBE click here: http://topica.com/u/?aaP9AU.bWix1n.YXJjaGl2 Or send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] TOPICA - Start your own email discussion group. FREE! http://www.topica.com/partner/tag02/create/index2.html --^
Re: [ZION] Starts with F Gossip
At 10:25 AM 11/3/2003 -0700, Uncle Presidente wrote: You ask yourself these three simple questions: 1. Is this fact about so and so kind? 2. Do I have undisputable knowledge of it, in other words, is it true? 3. Does the person I'm planning to share this with have a need to know? I suspect there are breakdowns in the system. Using your pregnancy example, I remember an instance where I was privy to such information, looked on favorably by the individual involved (quite excited, actually) (kindness test). I was given this information in confidence directly from the source (knowledge test). There were people who had a need to know (the family for example), but I know that I was correct in letting the individual personally disseminate the knowledge when and where she chose and just keep it to myself until it was a matter of public knowledge. Generally, though, I think it's a pretty sound test. Till // /// ZION LIST CHARTER: Please read it at /// /// http://www.zionsbest.com/charter.html /// / --^ This email was sent to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] EASY UNSUBSCRIBE click here: http://topica.com/u/?aaP9AU.bWix1n.YXJjaGl2 Or send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] TOPICA - Start your own email discussion group. FREE! http://www.topica.com/partner/tag02/create/index2.html --^
Re: [ZION] Starts with F Gossip
Shouldn't someone change the subject line to Starts with Z Spelling? -- Ronn! :) // /// ZION LIST CHARTER: Please read it at /// /// http://www.zionsbest.com/charter.html /// / --^ This email was sent to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] EASY UNSUBSCRIBE click here: http://topica.com/u/?aaP9AU.bWix1n.YXJjaGl2 Or send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] TOPICA - Start your own email discussion group. FREE! http://www.topica.com/partner/tag02/create/index2.html --^
Re: [ZION] Starts with F Gossip
Subject: Re: [ZION] Starts with F Gossip Shouldn't someone change the subject line to Starts with Z Spelling? -- Ronn! :) It's a code Ronn!!nnoR edoc a s'tI It's a code edoc a s'tI It's a a s'tI It's G s'tI It's a a s'tI It's a code edoc a s'tI It's a code Ronn!!nnoR edoc a s'tI Either that or I can't type! Tom // /// ZION LIST CHARTER: Please read it at /// /// http://www.zionsbest.com/charter.html /// / --^ This email was sent to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] EASY UNSUBSCRIBE click here: http://topica.com/u/?aaP9AU.bWix1n.YXJjaGl2 Or send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] TOPICA - Start your own email discussion group. FREE! http://www.topica.com/partner/tag02/create/index2.html --^