OK... I saw this woman on Hannity and Colmbs last night. She can kind of smile when she sees her mother... I didn't just imagine it. If the husband and the parents were in agreement on letting her die I wouldn't have as many reservations.... To me part of being married is getting along with the spouses family... or at least having some respect. I can not see over ruling the woman's parents on this matter. I think it is in very poor taste and quite cruel... JMO.





On Thursday, October 16, 2003, at 04:42 AM, Jen -- wrote:

So her parents are the ones keeping her alive ? When this happened in Ohio,
the *only* person who was able to make the final decision was first the
spouse, then the oldest child and lastly the parents ??


----- Original Message -----
From: "Charles" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: "'The Sandbox Discussion List'" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Wednesday, October 15, 2003 9:31 AM
Subject: RE: [Sndbox] Right to Die


I *think* she's breathing on her own. The sticking point for me is that
her
husband says she wouldn't want to live like she's living. I tend to think
he would be the one to know. It's not as if he's trying to knock her off
for insurance money, she's been this way for over a decade. Maybe he is
tired of seeing his wife suffer in a state of limbo.


It's exactly why everyone should have a DNR order on file if they are
opposed to being artificially kept alive. For me I only want a feeding
tube
if it is a temporary measure, or if I'm sentient. You know if I can talk
and carry on my life but can't swallow for instance. I don't want any
kind
of artificial respiration unless again it is a temporary measure.


Charles Mims http://www.the-sandbox.org


-----Original Message----- From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
On Behalf Of Jen --
Sent: Wednesday, October 15, 2003 3:22 PM
To: The Sandbox Discussion List
Subject: Re: [Sndbox] Right to Die

Is she on breathing machines or she is breathing on her own ?

If she is honestly comotose as well as brain dead, removing the feeding
tube
is not going to be painful for her.

Im not being judgemental because I dont know the circumstances, but I cant
imagine wanting to keep a person comotose for 13 years. That doesnt help
anyone in the situation. Although, I do agree with Charles, other members
of
the family should not be able to come in and fight the decision that the
next of kin has made. He/she must have her reasoning.


I have seen two people a few years ago die basicly after they became brain
dead. In one of those situations I was the decision maker and in one I
wasnt. But that decision isnt easy and noone should be *made* to change
their mind because someone else doesnt agree.


JMO.

Jen --
----- Original Message -----
From: "Charles" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: "'The Sandbox Discussion List'" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Wednesday, October 15, 2003 9:05 AM
Subject: RE: [Sndbox] Right to Die


Actually, the hospice folks here swear that removing the tube is
actually more peaceful for the patient than other methods. Their body
shuts down
and
goes to sleep.


Charles Mims http://www.the-sandbox.org


-----Original Message----- From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
On Behalf Of Laurie
Sent: Wednesday, October 15, 2003 11:38 AM
To: The Sandbox Discussion List
Subject: RE: [Sndbox] Right to Die

I have a problem with just stopping the feeding tube.
That is starving her to death...nope...can't go with that..but if she
is braindead, or in a permanent vegitative state, I can see increasing
pain meds and ending her life that way....no suffering. In my opinion,
starvation
is painful and suffering occurs.

Laurie
--- David <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
I'm like you on this one.  We had a tough decision with Julie's
mom...but fortunately the doctor was able to ask her mother if she
wanted more pain medicine or did she want to be more alert.  She
chose the pain medicine and it basically put her to sleep then shut
her down.
She was in so much pain
and suffering from the cancer.  Now this case is a bit different,
but if they feel that taking the woman off of the feeding tubes will
cause her pain and make her suffer, I'm not for her suffering.  I
say since she is basically dead anyway, then give her enough
medication to let it be an easy transition.  I don't like playing
God, but I don't think that is the case.

David L.

Ben Franklin:  "Only a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As
nations become corrupt, they have more need of masters."



-----Original Message-----
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] Behalf Of Charles
Sent: Wednesday, October 15, 2003 9:58 AM
To: 'The Sandbox Discussion List'
Subject: RE: [Sndbox] Right to Die


I haven't decided on this one. The woman has been vegetative for 13 years. For all practical purposes she is not alive, and reports I've heard is that her brain waves are severely deteriorated. The drain on her immediate family (Husband (children?)) must be enormous not even counting the financial drain keeping her artificially alive.

I'm looking at it like this, my wife (who according to the laws of
the state of FL is my next of kin) knows my wishes.  If she made the
difficult decision to cease heroic measures on me I wouldn't want my
mother to be able to step in and make a different decision.  If the
extended family wins in this case, that is the precedent that will
be set.

I know for *ME* I don't want to live like that.
Take the tube away.  If it
is the only thing keeping me alive, I mean, and I'm not conscious.
Now if I were still conscious and just couldn't eat, then it is a
different story.


Charles Mims http://www.the-sandbox.org


-----Original Message----- From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of Tim Harder Sent: Wednesday, October 15, 2003 10:38 AM To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Subject: [Sndbox] Right to Die


Has anyone been paying attention to the woman in Florida who has been a vegetable since 1990. They are going to remove her feeding
tube...
They say she will *probably* die in about two weeks....
Does anybody else find
this disturbing? I suppose they will have her loaded up on pain meds?
Is it better for her to go this way... or would it be better for
someone to give her a lethal dose of something?



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=====
I wanted a perfect ending... Now, I've learned, the hard way, that
some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning,
middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking
the moment,
and
making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.
Delicious ambiguity.
--Gilda Radner

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