Maxine Talks Turkey

I've been getting my house ready for Thanksgiving. You know, turning out the lights, pulling the shades, locking the doors.

I'm sure some of you out there are wondering how Floyd and I will spend the day. After I drag out of bed and down a couple of quarts of industrio-strength coffee, we love to settle down in our favorite chairs and watch one hot-air filled, goofy creature after another. Yep, it's the Thanksgiving parade of relatives!

Speaking of which, anybody who thinks Thanksgiving parade floats are boring probably doesn't own a B.B. gun.

After the parade, I'll head out into the kitchen to fix the feast.When making Thanksgiving dinner, do your giblets end up in the gravy? Or do you wear a bra when you cook?

Last year I stuffed a few turkeys. But this year, the uncles are eating somewhere else.

Every year I hear from folks who are stumped as to what they should do with all the leftover turkey, stuffing and potatoes. I have a great idea for Thanksgiving leftovers. Eat them. It's not that tough, Sherlock.

After the chowfest, those who still can button their pants head back to the television to watch the football games. What do those players say in the huddles anyway, "Lets bang into the other team and form a big pile?"

Actually, Thanksgiving is my kind of holiday. When else do you get away with giving your loved ones the bird after they tell you to stuff it?


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