I spent a few hours over the Christmas break, browsing in one of my
favourite bookshops in a nearby town. I had no specific mission objective,
other than browsing and ridding myself of two hours of spare time while
being kept warm at someone else's expense.
Having traversed most of the shelves whose contents interested me - and a
few that didn't, I eventually came to the 'overseas travel' section. Here
was a veritable plethora of publications on every imaginable overseas break
and in a corner, I found a section dedicated to phrase books. If you're
unaware of what a phrase book does, it's full of helpful statements in
English with a translation of that statement into the target language. I've
nothing against phrase books per se, but I've often wondered how useful they
might be. For example, I guess the sort of person who buys one, hasn't the
faintest idea of the target language and ergo, has little or no idea of how
to pronounce it. And even if they do find the question they want to ask -
and ask it of a native, it's likely the reply they'll get is in the target
language they can neither speak or understand. This important point seems to
be one that most phrase book publishers conveniently overlook...... thereby
rendering their publication of questionable value?
Anyway, not being one who is fazed by foreign languages as I've never found
them difficult to learn and I speak three fluently, I was somewhat surprised
to find a somewhat curious statement that someone might possibly want to
make to a householder in Holland or in the Dutch speaking part of Belgium.
Yes, I know there are other parts of the world where Dutch and variations of
it are spoken - but it's not what you'd really call a truly international
language like English or French, which in themselves have enormous
variations.
The text I came across was found in the Dutch/English phrasebook under the
section called "Getting to know the People and making friends."
Even now, I can't quite work out why the publishers felt this particular
statement warranted inclusion in their book but obviously someone in a
corridor of power had made a decision. The statement was as follows:
"MY DOG IS BARKING IN YOUR GARDEN."
Wouldn't the owner of the garden already know this - unless he or she was
deaf, and if they weren't, why would anyone want to thumb through a
phrasebook looking for a statement on a situation about which the
householder was already fully aware?
I abandoned further speculation on the matter in question and turned pages
until I reached the "Going to the Garage" section. Despite a detailed
examination of every single statement in English and Dutch I couldn't find
the one I wanted and which really would have been SO useful. Something like:
"I'M TERRIBLY SORRY, BUT MY TRIUMPH HAS LEAKED OIL ON YOUR DRIVEWAY."
Happy New Year
Jonmac
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