I know exactly what you are saying because my present Microsoft media
corded keyboard cost $3.00 at a garage sale. It did not require a scrub
though.
With the use of the free macro utility, Auto Hot Key,the media keys
were able to be programmed to do all sorts of tasks which made the
keyboard far more productive.
Auto Hot Key can be obtained from autohotkey.com and comes with quite an
extensive set of examples and instructions.
An example to set up anapplication key using Windows Key and F12 would
be as follows. Please note the symbols in the line below.
#F12:: send, +F10
The number sign above is for the Windows key while the plus sign
stands for the shift key.
Cheers
Neville.
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