From: Melina Sedo & Detlef Engel <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> Subject: [Tango-L] Milonga Codes and weird anecdotes
First off Melina, vielen Dank an Sie und Detlef for the wonderful workshops you gave in Portland. I learned much from you. >>I find it so very important to make everybody understand, that you need to respect the codes of polite behaviour, when you're in a Milonga. It's not even about Tango-Codigos, it's just basic instinct. ;-) <snip> Unfortunately all of this happened a lot to me during our recent tour to the US, even in the "very traditional" Milongas:<< While I agree with you in part, I think you may have missed one important aspect of this. The LOCAL codes of polite behaviour. And "basic instict" in social settings isn't really instinct, it is learned behaviour, so what is acceptable in Germany may not be acceptable in America, probably won't be acceptable in the Middle East, and might not be acceptable in BsAs Many try to abide by the codigos from BsAs in local US milongas (especially the better and more traveled Tangeuros) and that may work well in some places, but not so well in others. Argentine Tango in the USA does not exist in a vacuum. It exists within the context of American culture, and more specifically American Dance Culture. American Dance Culture teaches that if someone attending a dance, they want to dance, so it is OK to ask them. It teaches that it is acceptable for women to ask men. And it teaches that it is rude to refuse a dance, after all "it is only 3 minutes." Americans may be unpopular around the world, though less so this week than last, but there is nothing wrong with Americans (or anyone else) acting like Americans while in America. Your story about the rude Argentine is not surprising. I don't know his history, but he may have simply been following the advice "When in Rome, do as the Romans do," and he never would have acted that way in BsAs. I most always use the Cabeceo, especially at a festival or visiting a community new to me, but sometimes even following the Codigos in the USA can be perceived as being rude. For example: I was recently chastised by a woman for not asking her to dance. I explained to her that she was most always intensely watching the dance floor, so I could never catch her eye to ask yer. She told me that in that case, I should have walked up to her, tapped her on the shoulder to get her attention, and then asked her to dance! Brick Robbins San Diego, CA http://www.sandiegotangofestival.com/ _______________________________________________ Tango-L mailing list [email protected] http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l
