Northern hues at Tamil weddings

North Indian rituals such as sangeet are becoming a common feature of Tamil
ceremonies, discovers Sunday Times

Lakshmy Ramanathan | TNN

Chennai: Minutes before guests trickled in for his wedding reception in May,
Subramanian G aka Subs recalls being confronted by a posse of six women.
They had hidden his shoes and he was forced to part with Rs 5,000 even as
'Joote de do paise le lo' from Hum Aapke Hain Kaun played in the
background.
   A scene straight out of the Sooraj Barjatya school of film-making? It's
real life actually. This is just one of the many north Indian rituals that
featured at Subs' wedding to Ramya, in a sign of Bollywood's influence on
the traditionally lowkey Tamil. Ramya, who is now in the US with her new
husband, recalls being part
of the joota churana ritual at another family wedding. "My cousins have been
doing this at other weddings in the family. I used to be a part of this
motley crew before I got married," she says. It is a sign of changing times.
More so than stag parties and outlandish, themed weddings, which have been
common ever since the IT boom brought wealth to sections of the Tamil
community.
   Almost everyone links the trend to the popularity of Bollywood films.
Professor P Radhakrishnan, of the Madras Institute of Development Studies,
says increased exposure to Bollywood films is definitely a factor. But the
main reason, says Ramya, is that south Indians are increasingly marrying
northerners.
   When Mridula Swamy married in 2005, the ceremonies were modified to make
them more fun. At the mehndi and sangeet ceremony, her cousins decided to
weave the couple's love story into a medley of Hindi and Tamil film songs.
They did this because Mridula's fiancée was a different caste. "I remember
them dancing to the song 'Upkaruvaadu ooru vacha sore/ Uttiveedu ni podum
yennaku (Salted fish and soaked rice/ All I need is you to feed me'. The
song was so appropriate as my husband is a non-vegetarian and I am not!"
remembers Mridula.
   The actual wedding ceremony did away with traditional south Indian ritual
such as the nalangu, which has bride and groom rolling coconuts and breaking
pappad over each other's heads to symbolise the games played when child
marriages were the norm. "Certain rituals lose their significance as they
are not in sync with reality. The kashi yatra ritual makes sense only at an
arranged marriage where the father of the bride stops the groom from leaving
for Kashi (Varanasi) as it is symbolic of 'seeking an alliance'," she says.
   For many Tamil families, cross-over weddings have become an opportunity
to pack in as much fun as possible. Venkatesh Subramani and his wife Deepa
thought it would be refreshing to have a baraat with a horse-drawn chariot
instead of a jaanavasam (the baraat's south Indian equivalent).
   Interestingly, this cultural import is not without a hint of breaking the
rules. Venkatesh, for instance, was joined by his bride at the baraat; Subs
not only had his shoes stolen but his dhoti too! The couples interviewed
were not completely aware of the significance of the rituals they
incorporated, but didn't mind having them. "It's not so much the ritual as
the fact that it's an occasion to bond," says Lata.
   The pursuit of fun has, however, meant weddings becoming more expensive.
At her niece's wedding, Lata hired a troupe of dancers to perform a
selection of songs chosen by the bride. A five to six-member troupe can
charge anything between Rs 30,000 and 40,000.
   Freelance disc jockeys such as DJ Ash charge upwards of Rs 15,000 to play
for 50 to 100 people. It can cost nearly Rs 3,000 to hire a horse in Chennai
and more than Rs 6,000 for a horse-drawn chariot. This is why Radhakrishnan
believes such cross-over weddings are securely linked to a culture of
consumerism. "The number of rituals that are included is linked to one's
buying power," he says, adding that the trend is a big-city phenomenon.
   Wedding planners Lakshmi and Saraswathi of Event art disagree. They say
the trend exists even in tier two cities such as Karur, Tirupur, Pondicherry
and Erode. The sister-duo organised performances at six such weddings across
Tamil Nadu this year. "The only difference is that the influence of
Bollywood doesn't extend to smaller cities," says Lakshmi.
   Saraswathi adds that "the trend has caught on because every one wants to
have fun and carry with them memories to last a lifetime. Such weddings
ensure just that".

 SOUTH MEETS NORTH: Venkatesh Subramani opted for a baraat with chariot
drawn horses at his wedding (above); a traditional wedding (right)

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