Lingering regrets, the kind you hang onto for years, can be great company,
returning daily to keep some part of you living an alternate version of
your life and career. They can even be functional if they propel you
forward, determined not to make the same mistakes again. Intuitively,
though, we know that left to fester, regrets can control your mood to ill
effect and make you miserable. The solution is not to repress the thoughts
or take on some kind of delusional “no regrets” bravado, says a
psychologist and argues, we’re better off digging into our oldest woes and
becoming acquainted with their nature, and the nature of our response to
them. namely those about what we *could have done*, not what we *did do* wrong.
Although we experience both sorts, studies have found that across cultures
and demographics, it’s regrets about inactions that haunt more of us for
long periods. So you’re more likely to feel achy about never auditioning
for that performing-arts school as a teenager, or never joining the Peace
Corps, than you are to regret a bad real-estate move or a nightmare job
that you took. 70% of people said the slowest-burning regrets were those
related to an action not taken that would have brought them closer to a
goal for their ideal self, while 30% held onto missteps in the “should have
done” department, maybe sensing that they should have held a day job, or
that they should have lived closer to family to be a better daughter, son,
aunt, or uncle, for instance. Firstly, introspection means thinking about
the things that happen to you with an attitude of curiosity and
self-exploration. To display introspection means to be interested in your
past and to try to draw some conclusions about yourself or other people
Or, to simply spend time thinking about the pleasurable things in your
past. Introspection can add real colour and depth to your current
experiences and also includes notions such as nostalgia and sentimentality.
Introspection has a light and inquisitive tone to it. You can definitely
get a lot from increasing the time that you spend in introspection.
Introspection can lead you to learning more about yourself. This gives you
better information about how you've changed over time and why you do what
you do. It can also be really valuable to increase your problem-solving
skills. Not only do you know more about yourself, but the calm reflection
brought on by introspection helps you work through your problems.
On the other hand, when we think about the past in terms of the regrets
we have, we are ruminating. At those times, where we think about the past
and we wonder what we might have done differently, or we wonder about the
actions of others, we are essentially spinning our wheels. In doing this,
we don't draw anything from the past but continue to sink our present
moment into our regrets. There is little pleasure or insight to be gained
from rumination; on the contrary, it's more associated with anxiety and
depression. Rumination has a heavy and automatic tone to it. We can
sometimes mistake rumination for problem-solving. Just because we're
thinking about the past and our actions, we can think that we're actually
sorting things out. The truth is, we're just going round and round in a
circle. In addition, there is often a heavy self-critical tone to
rumination. Rather than being a way out of problems, it's often a way to
replay our failures and torture ourselves. Little good comes from
rumination.
SUPPOSE THE RUMINATION TURNS INTO THE DISCRIMINATIVE INTROSPECTIONS,
THEN, FUTURE IS BRIGHTER THAN ONE REGRETTED SO LONG. WEST ALWAYS THOUGHT IN
TERMS OF HIGHLY PROJECTED COMMERCIALISED LIVINGS WITH THE CONDITIONAL
SPECTRUM OF LIFE; THE MARKETER TAAKES IT ALL AND THE MAJORITY ARE DESERTED
FOR THE COUNSELLINGS ONLY, AGAIN COMMERCIALLY. Instead, Indian Vedic
knowhow persons, knew that Krodhat bhavati kaunteya; krodhād bhavati
sammohaḥ sammohāt smṛiti-vibhramaḥ
smṛiti-bhranśhād buddhi-nāśho buddhi-nāśhāt praṇaśhyati—counselling ends
there; *BG 2.63*: Anger leads to clouding of judgment, which results in
bewilderment of memory. When memory is bewildered, the intellect gets
destroyed; and when the intellect is destroyed, one is ruined. Anger
against whom; against self; I am unable to have my own way is a regret of
unknowingly thinking, that THERE IS ONE-“YOUR WAY’; suppose if there is one
, WHAT IS THE GUARANTEE THAT “YOUR WAY” WILL NOT BE REGRETTED BY YOUR
POSTERITY SEEKING THE REGRETTED WAY OF YOUR PARENT, AS THAT MODEL TRYING TO
ACQUIRE BY YOUR POSTERITY?.
You are the society and you are within the society; and the anxiety
of yourself to appear taller than others, alone , you thought , at that
time, as your way; your thinking did not showed up its head, on your own
from somewhere from the space and you plucked it; it was a discovery from
somewhere which you thought, it suit for yourself; however had you lived
that life ( now there is time or not as no one knows when are you
regretting) there is again , no guarantee , that you would not have
regretted, as TIME AND SPACE THE FOURTH DIMENSION might have changed. Hence
your ancestors lead you kindly to lead a life of freedom, from where, you
can fly, in all the ten directions, to check, which direction can cool you
off, as you do a test drive; that is what they, your ancestors taught you;
but your poor brain, jumped out of the path, to lead a life of misery, and
find your parent, a scapegoat, for your failure. The West were struck and
hence they came to India to gain strength. Indians do not know that, but
catch some glimpse as pleasure, inducing your senses. You are on the right
track; gauge your ability and reach that level; while try imp-roving the
ability to fly; an adamant stone cannot fly but a true kite can, with the
control in the tight fingers.
ITis ruin if man do an unbefitting thing; Fit things to leave undone
will equal ruin bring. Explanation: He will perish who does not what is not
fit to do; and he also will perish who does not do what it is fit to do.
(Kural in English):seydhakka alla seyakkedum seydhakka seyyaamai yaanunG
kedum; Cause of regret is your action of performing and not the action.
कर्मण्यकर्म य: पश्येदकर्मणि च कर्म य: | स बुद्धिमान्मनुष्येषु स युक्त:
कृत्स्नकर्मकृत् || 18||karmaṇyakarma yaḥ paśhyed akarmaṇi cha karma yaḥ sa
buddhimān manuṣhyeṣhu sa yuktaḥ kṛitsna-karma-kṛit// *BG 4.18*: Those who
see action in inaction and inaction in action are truly wise amongst
humans. Although performing all kinds of actions, they are yogis and
masters of all their actions. THIS IS THE INDIAN THOUGHT; WEST KNOWS IT;
BUT PRETEND TO BE ADAMANT.
KR IRS 23922
On Thu, 22 Sept 2022 at 18:18, Srinivasan Sridharan <
[email protected]> wrote:
>
>
> ---------- Forwarded message ---------
> From: Srinivasan Sridharan <[email protected]>
> Date: Thu, Sep 22, 2022 at 5:46 AM
> Subject: WESTERN REALISATION OF LIFE'S PURPOSE
>
>
> https://getpocket.com/explore/item/the-5-most-common-regrets-of-the-dying-and-what-we-can-learn-from-them?utm_source=pocket-newtab
>
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