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From: 'N Sekar' via iyer123 <[email protected]>
Date: Sun, Sep 24, 2023 at 9:19 PM
Subject: [iyer123] From Op India - Effects of colonialism - as Satguru said
many of us still live in G M T and not in I S T




How colonialism impacted the way we eat, and still continues to plague our
way of eating

We take pride when we show off how many Italian dishes we know about-
Risotto, Arancini, Polenta, Ossobuco, Spagheti ala Carbonara, Focaccia and
many more.
23 September, 2023
Virender Kapoor <https://www.opindia.com/author/virenderkapoor/>
An average Indian meal - Image Source: breathedreamgo
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74

‘Ask not what you can do for your country, ask what’s for lunch!’ – Orson
Welles

Almost 80 years ago, there used to be brass plate which had a rude message-
‘right of admission reserved’ outside many restaurants in CP (Connaught
Place), oops Rajiv chowk now.

“*Angrez* *chalegaye**, **paar* *humari* *Angreziat* *Nahi* *gayi*’ comes
to your mind when you see such things. We read it in text books or some
other writings here and there that the places where Gora sahibs and
memsahibs dined used to have prominent boards outside saying that ‘Indians
and dogs not allowed’. They said that to your face. Of course MK Gandhi was
thrown out of the first class compartment of a train- the person who got us
freedom as we were told.

I won’t get into discussing article15 (1, 2) of our constitution which now
prevents any such restrictions to be imposed- great. However, we still have
that ‘*angrezi keeda*’ lurking somewhere deep down in our hearts and heads.

You find it so funny that from a dhaba to five stars in India aka Bharat,
we write on the Menu card – ‘Indian breads’ for tandoori roti, naan,
paratha, kulcha, poori, missi roti, makki ki roti,Lachcha parantha, rumali
roti (handkerchief bread?), bajare ki roti, jowar roti – for the love of
the goras?- ‘*bhai** wo* *hamari* *bhasha* *nahi* *samajhte**– **Itna** to *
*socho*’ goes the argument of chaploos argumentative Indian.

I don’t know how they understand pakora, daal bati choorma, samosa and
chaat, golgappa, dahi bada, pao bhaji, maska pao, bhelpuri – try
translating these! You will get bheja fry. By the way, Japanese PM Fumio
Kishida on his earlier visit had golgappa after golgappa with PM Modi.

What about kabab aka kebab? What about choley kachori, *Lucknow **ka*
*makhan** and Varanasi **ka** m**alaiyo**? These are exotic.*

Such guys may still love Jee 20 instead of G20 as it sounds so subservient
no? Unfortunately we still have that inferiority complex- which many may
not easily agree to. Wearing Maanyavar brand instead of Marks and Spencer
or ‘mochi’ shoes instead of ‘Christian Luboutin’ still does not help much.
Made in USA or made in France still gives you a high and you have not quite
reached there mentally- made in India. Lot of catching up, emotionally,
mentally, and of course physically needs to be done. There used to be
something known as made by USA, Ulhasnagar Sindhi Association as well.

Robert Redford said ‘Health food may be good for conscience but Oreos
(biscuits please) taste a lot better’. We are so hung up on pronouncing
even Italian cuisine perfectly- it is not pizza it is Peetza bro!

Lazania, lasagna or lasagna- the jury is still out. We take pride when we
show off how many Italian dishes we know about- Risotto, Arancini, Polenta,
Ossobuco, Spagheti ala Carbonara, Focaccia and many more. You may know
nothing about these but you have to be purr-fect in pronouncing these lest
you look down-market!

If you can decipher all these- like Risotti-, why can’t the *firangi*
understand
what is tandoori roti or much easier naan?

There are dozens of types of breads across the world. Let me guess some of
these tongue twisters- Baguette, Bammy, Taiyaki, Hotteok, Pretzel,
Ciabatta, Kentish Huffkin, Bap, Crumpet and let me stop here. These are
mostly western stuff- but English Rotis for me.

We had to learn table manners and use ‘*Ch**uree* *Kanta*’ properly- ‘Fork
and knife’ *yaar*. You eat soup and don’t drink- wow. We take pride in
eating with chops sticks. So Chineese-ish. We know what are dumplings,
croissant, Quiche, Coq au vin and love French onion soup. Oh how English.

In Paris most of us may get horrified to know what is on the menu.

Sample these- L’oursin-sea Urchin, Escargots- snails, Le Cuisses de
grenouille (frog legs), Tete de veau (Calf’s head) and it goes on. We love
to flaunt knowing what is Ris de veau which is nothing but sweet breads and
Tiramisu or Spanish Roscon de Reyes, Natillas,Flan or Leche frita.
My Roman holiday

In Rome I have to do as Romans do- yes I did. In fact I couldn’t. I went to
a small bakery in Rome and I wanted to have a pizza. I wanted a chicken
pizza and beef was a no no for me. I asked him for a chicken Pizza and said
‘no beef please’. The guy and another girl standing next to him gave a
blank look. I said ‘Only chicken’ and he still looked dumb, now in fact
dumber. I was hungry and wanted to eat something but he refused to even
cooperate. I took a paper napkin and borrowing a pen drew a chicken as good
as I could- still nothing! I drew a bull and put a cross on it- still no
help. ‘*Yeh kya ho raha hai bhai*’ was my reaction. Either he was trying to
be cheeky or something was drastically wrong. In the meantime, one guy
walked in who spoke English and Italian both and help me get a chicken
pizza.

I had another such experience in Paris too. Uzbekistan was a clincher. Four
of us went to a very big well-lit restaurant with several cars parked
outside. We thought it would be a good place to have dinner. Being a bit
adventurous, we thought let’s try their local stuff. We could not
understand a thing given on the menu. When we spoke to the waiter, he could
not understand a word of English. We tried our luck with the manager and
still no luck. Finally out of frustration, we walked out and picked up some
cheese and bread from a small store to survive the night.
Why we bend backwards?

Before I forget, you know why we keep a quarter plate on the left of the
full plate? Most won’t know. Let me explain, the English used knife and
fork to slice up the roast chicken or a cutlet on their full plate and
broke a piece of bun or bread from the quarter plate with their left hand-
and that was the best layout of crockery on the dining table. We eat in a
different way, we eat rotis and break a roti to make a morsel (girahin) and
do that with right hand and then use the same to dip it in butter chicken
or chicken curry from the full plate and put it in our mouth. For us, a
quarter plate is better to be kept on the right but what *angrez* taught
us, we still stick to the left and not right- right? So much for western
table ‘manners’.

Yet, some eat masala dosa with fork and knife and Aloo paratha and samosa
as well!
The India way

G20 dinner hosted for the delegates by president of Bharat had all
vegetarian spread. From Mumbai Pao, paatram and chutney, Vanavarnam,
Bakarkhani to Kashmiri kahwa and they loved it.

It is a wonderful beginning with a bang. We must teach what we eat and what
we wear- world is one family.

‘So often these days Indian food passes for spirituality. I don’t meditate,
but I eat two samosas every day!’ – Dan Bern

N Sekar

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