As enlightening as it is to see people's perceptions of what it means to be 'female'/'female'/'hermaphodite'/'trans', they all come across as prescriptive. If I don't show the 'male' or 'female' qualities described, am I not 'male'/'female'?
If I say that I am female, but I don't fit any of the 'female' qualities described here, am I going to be accepted as female by the group? What about the 'male' ones? If instead I display the 'male' qualities described, am I going to be treated differently than if I display the 'female' qualities? If I am a male and my name is 'Jackie', am I going to have to spend the entire time wondering how that affects how the others in the group think about me? If the question is important enough to be asked and answered then it certainly seems like it would have some effect. And then when the question being an uncomfortable one for people is brought up, the response is that the only way something is going to be done about it is if a good enough explanation can be given. This is not an isolated incident. This happens in every group where something like this comes up. After the 10th or 100th time it seems rather hopeless and there is no reason to actually answer the question because in a month/six month/year/whatever the same thing will come up and the same explanation will be demanded. So if you are someone whose gender is routinely questioned by people, how much effort should you have to put into making other people actually treat you as a person? Does the responsibility of making a group a friendly and inclusive place fall on the people who lack friendly inclusive places? Should they have to explain every time something happens? Questions like this also beg similar questions. Is TiddlyWiki NT? ND? If tiddlywiki has a gender, does it have a sexual orientation? Why would any of those questions be any less reasonable to ask than if it has a gender? If you want an enlightening experience, you should ask if people think that TiddlyWiki is bipolar, and then remember that everything someone says in response is what they think when they hear that I am bipolar. Or dyslexic. And then there will be innumerable reasons why "oh, well it wasn't about you", just somehow the generalisations are about the mythical "bipolar people who aren't present". These are hardly academic questions, when I saw this question here, I seriously considered just leaving the group. The only reason I am answering you is that you have been nice in the past, and I think that you genuinely don't understand what the question implies. If I had been feeling bad today I would have just left. The tech community in particular is very bad about things like this, and it is much much easier to just leave a group that has problems than try to explain every time. -- You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "TiddlyWiki" group. To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to [email protected]. To post to this group, send email to [email protected]. Visit this group at https://groups.google.com/group/tiddlywiki. To view this discussion on the web visit https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/tiddlywiki/df7ade3e-718c-43fa-bb35-ef2e40d886f2%40googlegroups.com. For more options, visit https://groups.google.com/d/optout.
