Hiya,
On 19/01/2021 10:23, Éric Vyncke via Datatracker wrote:
Éric Vyncke has entered the following ballot position for draft-ietf-tls-oldversions-deprecate-11: Yes When responding, please keep the subject line intact and reply to all email addresses included in the To and CC lines. (Feel free to cut this introductory paragraph, however.) Please refer to https://www.ietf.org/iesg/statement/discuss-criteria.html for more information about IESG DISCUSS and COMMENT positions. The document, along with other ballot positions, can be found here: https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/draft-ietf-tls-oldversions-deprecate/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------- COMMENT: ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you for the work put into this document. Special thanks to the shepherd, Sean Turner, who did a great job to describe the WG consensus. Rob Wilton's point about minimum version is also important and should be addressed in the abstract (even if the text is clearer in section 1). Please find below some nits. I hope that this helps to improve the document, Regards, -éric -- Abstract -- "This document, if approved, formally deprecates Transport Layer" => should ", if approved," be removed now from the abstract? The RFC Editor will probably do it though.
Yep, that's standard fare so fine to leave as-is since the RFC folks know what to do there already.
-- Section 1 -- "deprecate these old versions." should the "these old version" be followed by the enumeration ?
Fair enough. I guess that snippet in isolation could be ambiguous. Also fixed in repo - [1] with diff vs. -11 at [2] Cheers, S.[1] https://github.com/tlswg/oldversions-deprecate/blob/master/draft-ietf-tls-oldversions-deprecate.txt [2] https://tools.ietf.org/rfcdiff?url1=draft-ietf-tls-oldversions-deprecate-11.txt&url2=https://raw.githubusercontent.com/tlswg/oldversions-deprecate/master/draft-ietf-tls-oldversions-deprecate.txt
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