Hey, Jeron; It is true, that all we have sometimes is our pain. Like you, my TM acted so as to give me "fits" whenever under stress, either physical or mental. I just lost my job as a result. I was associate professor of economics at a small engineering school in the Middle East, and I got to the point where I just couldn't perform in the classroom anymore. So, they fired me and sent me home, to NYC. We face economic oblivion if something doesn't turn around.
I know the TM-ers are there and suffering along with me, some who are paralyzed, who used to dance. For me, the thought of how to support myself another two decades until natural death is likely is depressing to say the least. In this country, you eat what you kill, or you don't eat. But for me, Jeron, I truly believe that this life is the womb of the soul, just as the uterine world was the womb of the body. God wants us to become reliant only on Him, and not on our spouses, our friends, our smooth circumstances, our health, anything outside our own selves and His guidance. So, what might be happening right now, for you, Jeron, is a time where He is forcing you to give up all worldly associations, of love or hate, and of reliance on anything but Him, and THEN will He inspire your soul with a way out of your difficulties. The Lord promises us that as soon as we have freed ourselves from these nether-worldly attachments, of anything of water or clay, then He will guide us and solve our problems through means and inspirations from the unseen world. "O My servants, sorrow not if, in this world and on this earthly plain, things contrary to your wishes have been ordained and manifested by God. For days of blissful joy, of heavenly delight, are assuredly in store for you. Worlds holy and spiritually glorious, will be unveiled to your eyes. You are destined by Him, in this world and hereafter, to partake of their benefits, to share in their joys, and to obtain a portion of their sustaining grace. To each and every one of them, you will, on doubt, attain." This gives me hope in my dark alone, every morning and evening. And we know that tests and difficulties have always been the lot of those who He has chosen to be near to Him in all His worlds. I truly believe this. Jeron, please email me anytime, and I will try to be here for you. Love, Dalton Garis From: Jeron Rampersad <[email protected]> Date: Sun, 19 Jun 2011 01:10:43 +0000 To: john snodgrass <[email protected]>, <[email protected]>, "[email protected]" <[email protected]> Subject: RE: [TMIC] I need you guys.... Resent-From: <[email protected]> Resent-Date: Sat, 18 Jun 2011 18:11:48 -0700 > Thanks, > I guess I just need to catch a break. I wish I wasn't so alone right now > though. It's really tough having no one there for you in a time of need. All I > truly have is my pain. > Jeron > > > Date: Sat, 18 Jun 2011 17:47:56 -0700 > From: [email protected] > Subject: Re: [TMIC] I need you guys.... > To: [email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected] > > Jeron, > perhaps the subject is quiet on here in the social list,perhaps you have been > getting private emails,hope so, > > My mind just goes blank to think about it. > > we are survivors or we wouldnt have lasted this long! > > I trust that you will find ways and means to get by another day then another > then another. > > you have my prayers,and Im not just saying that. > > God knows we dont have the answers for these things but we do have each > other,friends to lean on,to vent on. > > Im not gonna spew about me,,this is about you,and you are special. > > wish I was close enough to punch you in the shoulder and say,,hang in there. > > when you have opportunity think right thoughts. > > you will have to force it,we all do with one thing or another. > > things will change,,they always do. > > Love in Christ..... > > John the red-neck transverse myelitis mangled Baptist in WV > > > > --- On > > > Sat, 6/18/11, [email protected] <[email protected]> wrote: >> >> From: [email protected] <[email protected]> >> Subject: Re: [TMIC] I need you guys.... >> To: "Jeron Rampersad" <[email protected]>, [email protected] >> Date: Saturday, June 18, 2011, 2:45 AM >> >> Oh Jeron >> . . . just know that we are here, for you. >> >> Janet >>> ----- Original Message ----- >>> From: Jeron Rampersad <http:///mc/[email protected]> >>> To: [email protected] <http:///mc/[email protected]> >>> Sent: Friday, June 17, 2011 1:24 PM >>> Subject: [TMIC] I need you guys.... >>> >>> Hi guys, >>> Sorry I have been away for so long. I've been through hell since January 1st >>> this year with my complications with TM. I started having really bad spasms >>> then and I just thought they were normal, but here was our little friend TM >>> acting up again through an infection I managed to pick up in Brazil. I was >>> treated and got better and my wife and I were relocated to the Caribbean, >>> where we are from, by her company just after that. We moved and things >>> settled nicely for a while, but with TM a while is all you have. I got >>> another attack. I've been hospitalised on 7 separate occasions since then >>> just to deal with pain, because sadly neurology is not a practised science >>> in the caribbean. My wife endured all the while at my side. At least she did >>> for a while..... >>> She finally got fed up of it all, seeing me spasm out of control in loads of >>> pain must have been hard. She left me in mid April and I have been trying to >>> cope since, but it's really hard. I love my wife and hate that I put her >>> through so much, but I never thought she would have left. We haven't >>> spoken in a month now and I have medical bills piling up and it's getting >>> scary now. I just need to catch a break. It's more challenging now than when >>> I was first hit by TM, because for the first time in my life I'm truly >>> alone. I know my faith is being tested; I wish I knew what God wanted from >>> me. I need you guys..... >>> Jeron >
