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Uh, John,
I was rolling on the floor with this one! Now
buddy, how am I to take this? I'm not offended by it, infact if you knew my
sense of humor you would you would take this in a humorous way also. I
assume thats what you did. So do you really want the answers? Dr. Laura
Schlessinger is not the one to ask!! I'll be laughing about this all
day!!
Jeff- the former George Carlin fan!
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Tuesday, November 30, 2004
1:17
Subject: Re: [TruthTalk] Toward a
(biblical) Unilateral Covenant
Dear Dr. Laura,
Thank you for doing so much
to educate people regarding God's Law. I have
learned a great deal from
your show, and try to share that knowledge with as
many people as I
can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
lifestyle, for
example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly
states it to be
an abomination. End of debate.
I do need some advice from you, however,
regarding some of the other
specific laws and how to follow them. 1. When I
burn a bull on the altar as
a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor
for the Lord -Lev.
1.9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is
not pleasing to
them. Should I smite them? 2. I would like to sell my
daughter into slavery,
as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age,
what do you think would
be a fair price for her? 3. I know that I am
allowed no contact with any
woman while she is in her period of menstrual
cleanliness - Lev.15:19-24.
The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried
asking, but most women take
offense. 4. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed
possess slaves, both male
and female, provided they are purchased from
neighboring nations. A friend
of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans,
but not Canadians. Can you
clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
5.
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus
35:2
clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to
kill him
myself? 6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating
shellfish is an
abomination -Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than
homosexuality. I
don't agree. Can you settle this? 7. Lev. 21:20 states
that I may not
approach the altar of God it I have a defect in my
sight.
I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to
be
20/20, or is there some wiggle room there? 8. Most of my male friends
get
their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even
though
this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they
die?
9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes
me
unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves? 10. My uncle
has a
farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the
same
field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of different kinds
of
thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a
lot.
Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the
whole
town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them
to
death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with
their
in-laws? (Lev.20:14) I know you. have studied these things
extensively, so I
am confident that you can help.
Thank you again for
reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your devoted
disciple - Me
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