Lance Muir wrote:

----- Original Message ----- From: "Jonathan Hughes" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: "Lance Muir" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: April 21, 2005 08:10
Subject: Caroline's Blog





   April 21, 2005


Hell

Jesus spoke more about hell than anyone else in the bible....or did he?

The word "hell" occurs 15 times in my NIV bible , 13 of those times in Jesus' sermons. Jesus' audience, first century Jews, did not have the same concept of hell - a hellish place of fire and brimstone, eternal damnation and eternal conscious punishment - as we do. They believed that people went to Gehenna when they died and there their souls are purged and purified before they enter heaven. Gehenna is the word Jesus used and the word that got translated as "hell" in our bibles.

My pastor once told us of the time his 9 year old son went to camp. After one week, they got back a dirt encrusted stranger. They ran a hot bath and scrubbed and washed and scrubbed and washed until something recognizable emerged. "Ah, there you are my son!" he exclaimed.

Now that I know Judaism does not have a concept of hell and other places of eternal damnation, I can picture a different ending for the people who bloated up and died of snake venom near Edom or who puked their guts out and died while eating quail at Kibroth Hattaavah.

I think they all ended up in Gehenna where the LORD tossed them into hot steam rooms until they started to sweat toxins. Then He thrashed them thoroughly with hyssop and birch branches and steamed them even some more. Then He pushed up His sleeves and pounded and kneaded, stretched and folded them into artistic pretzel and origami shapes to loosen them up. Then He slapped them face down on thin mats and commanded His angels to walk all over them. Many a hardened sinner has turned white as a ghost and muttered, "Oh dear G_d" when they saw the size of the angel coming purposefully toward them.

God would walk around, supervising and nodding approval and has been known to pounce on an unsuspecting sinner, wrenching his neck around and cracking 15 or 16 vertebrae into position and moving on before the victim can let out a scream. Meanwhile, his angel would continue to walk up and down nonchalantly as if this was a very common occurrence.

Then the sinners are tossed into vats of hot water and long, drawn out groans would echo around the room. Aaaaahhhhhh!!! Ooooooohhhhh!! and Ooooooooooo. They would alternate between soaking limply and blasting through energetic wash-and-spin cycles which involved all sorts of detergents, soaps and shampoos. The light-hearted work songs of the angels running the water and soap systems added to the surrealness of the whole experience.

Finally, God dips them in a cool water rinse, flips them inside out, wrings out their innards, snaps them right way up with a practiced flick of His wrists and stands them on their feet. And then He says with absolute delight, "Ah, there you are, my children!"


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You are joking of course. Jewish beliefs and concepts are invalid when they do not agree with the words of Christ.
Terry


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"Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you 
ought to answer every man."  (Colossians 4:6) http://www.InnGlory.org

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