Well, I managed to run this bug over by following this simple and rather stupid 
little hack, pointed out at this website:
http://www.digitalsanctum.com/2007/11/07/uninstalling-nginx-via-apt-get-stopping-nginx-invoke-rcd-initscript-nginx-action-stop-failed/

Went and opened up the apport init.d file,
sudo gedit /etc/init.d/apport
and added
"exit 0" without the quotes right below the script declarations, so it'd just 
quit out completely out of the script. This I did, of course, AFTER I forcibly 
removed apport from my services startup with:
sudo update-rc.d -f apport remove

As quoted by Shane from the site itself... sadly:
Pure hackery but it works.

Recap:
sudo update-rc.d -f apport remove
sudo gedit /etc/init.d/apport
 - Add "exit 0" right after script declarations... turns out to be line 17 or 
18.
sudo apt-get update
sudo apt-get --reinstall install apport


Considering the fact that my computer is now a bit faster since not loading 
apport at startup... I think I'll leave it like that. XP 

This is NOT advisable under normal circumstances! I just don't care much
for error reporting right now. >.>; But that's just me. I like the
manual stuff personally.

-- 
unable to reinstall apport
https://bugs.launchpad.net/bugs/333823
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