John, I appreciate your frustration. But look at the Ubuntu bug list.
<https://bugs.launchpad.net/ubuntu> Ubuntu has no shortage of bug
reports -- as I write this, there are 73192 that haven't even been
confirmed yet. The purpose of a bug tracker is not to record every bug
that people have ever encountered. The purpose of a bug tracker is to
help developers make best use of their time. Generally, developer time
is better spent fixing known-reproducible bugs than investigating
unreproduced ones. And ensuring that people have installed all updates
is a simple way of preventing bug reports that may not be reproducible
at all.

Since I reported this bug, for a large majority of Ubuntu users, apport
has switched from helping them report bugs to submitting error reports.
Because this requires only one click, and no Launchpad account, we get
orders of magnitude more error reports than we ever did of bug reports.
And error reports are accepted regardless of whether you have installed
all updates. So it is not correct that if apport prevents you from
reporting a bug, the bug will never be fixed.

Nevertheless, fixing this bug would still be useful. If you want it to
be fixed, the best thing you can do is to find someone to test and/or
review Abhinav's patch. Commenting in this bug report is the least
effective way of doing that, because everyone subscribed to the bug
report already knows that the patch exists.

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https://bugs.launchpad.net/bugs/340970

Title:
  When apport complains package is outdated, it doesn't let you update

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