I've marked all your bugs as a duplicate of this bug, because all the problems 
are basically the same. You're problems should be fixed by the new 
update-manager.
Please be sure that you are using the latest package manager.
If you still have a problem you might try to run the following commands in a 
terminal:
$ sudo rm /var/cache/apt/*.bin
$ sudo apt-get update
or:
$ sudo dpkg --configure -a
$ sudo apt-get install -f
$ sudo apt-get update

If you are able to reproduce this bug please attach your file
/var/lib/dpkg/status to this report. (see bug 138146)

(Thanks to Michael Vogt for the commands)

-- 
Update manager fails - the package lists or status file could not be parsed 
opened
https://bugs.launchpad.net/bugs/115087
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