Nov 2, 2003
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I have had a terrible week. My mind is restless and I have started regretting why I got into that outrageous venture. That campus girl whose name I failed to establish will land me into problems. I want to go back to campus and look for that shattering beauty. But then what do I say when I see her? That madam I am �booking� to take you back home when your school term (no at campus they are semesters), when your semester is over? Does she remember me anyway? On that day, she did not even care to look me in the face. I kept glancing towards her but all along I was worried of causing an accident. She sat there with that serious face looking directly forward as if she was worried of the future. Did she realise I was a �tyro� in driving? Yes she must have, because three times along the campus drive the car went out and did �pukupuku� after failing to either engage the right gear or balance the acceleration and the clutch, but in the end I made it. �The end justifies the means,� our political education teacher in S.3 used to say. Ah Campus! Imagine I had spent so much time close to the place but I had never had chance to get even closer to the gate. But to do what? A kanaabe at campus, the seat of the highest concentration of intelligence in the nation! But this time I went there, moreover driving. The learned call it cruising, yes I went cruising in a Mark II special edition, �kanamba�. Yes I will go back and tell this girl that since that Sunday afternoon she changed my �timing�. Mukwasi should be cautioned. Yes I understand he is our supervisor but he should know that he is also a kanaabe, we are all car washers and being supervisor does not elevate one to any higher ranks. There are no ladders in the car washers business, we are all kanaabe and that is it. But Mukwasi was so hard on me when I came back from taking the belle. After realising that I was missing with the customer�s car, Mukwasi ran to the police without even making any inquiries. My journey to campus lasted less than forty minutes but by the time I came back all roads had been sealed off. Fortunately I was sealed inside the cordon. I did not have to pass by any roadblock but when I sauntered back, Mukwasi insisted on taking me to the police in order to call off the search. I had to tell Mukwasi the truth and he called other kanaabes and made me repeat my funny adventure before them all. You know what? That solved the problem for me for, fortunately, two of the kanaabes had also seen the belle when she passed by the washing bay struggling with the heavy suitcase with the boda-boda carrying the rest of the property. That they had said several things about her bums, her body and her chocolate colour. Unfortunately a customer had driven in and they had rushed to struggle over who would wash his car. After the revelation, the others congratulated me over my bravery and started referring to me as Gaetano. You should have been there to see how attentive the boys were when I narrated to them my short venture into campus, the seat of the highest institution of learning in the nation. Even when a customer drove in, nobody rushed to lure him, they were all bamboozled over my escapade. When Mukwasi repeated his threats to suspend me, the other boys booed him saying he was only jealous of me, that if he had actually seen the girl he would instead have given me the Pearl of Africa Award in Adventurism. Mukwasi retreated but he wasn�t amused. Even up to now he looks at me suspiciously. For two weeks I will not wash a car alone. That is, I will not be allowed to hold keys from the customer, I will only have to work with somebody else. Now I have developed strange habits at home. Since that encounter with that girl whose name I failed to establish (this one makes me feel really dumb), I have realised my wife is an ugly woman. A mother of two but she is already too bulky for me. Despite the Mirki (milk) accent, the other girl had a sweet resonant voice. The few words she spoke to me are stuck firmly in my head and sometimes I get hallucinated by that sweet voice. But my wife�s voice is like she has been taking porridge � you know the Matembe tone. I wish my wife were at least five percent of the other beauty. Oba why does God have to make such drastic differences among people?! I do not know whether it will be visiting day at campus next Sunday but I will try my luck. At least the gatekeeper will tell me when it is visiting Sunday at campus. Hope I will remember the location of the hall at which I left the beauty. Watch this space, I will keep you posted. Yours truly, |
� 2003 The Monitor Publications
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