Uganda Weekly Observer, 23rd December 2004 Size does matter!
Girls Recline At the Makerere University Guest House, the girls are lounging in the sofas in the lobby, where Joanna, 23, is scheduled to interview a former lecturer before the girls continue to Wandegeya. The lecturer arrives, goes to the restaurant with Joanna, leaving Elle, 25, Stella, 29 and Lorna, 27, waiting in the lobby. Joanna returns shortly after and the lecturer jumps into his car� Joanna: He forgot a document he has to give me. He is collecting it from Lincoln flats� Stella: Eh! But those bowed legs that even show through jeans! He must be quite endowed! Is he married? Giggles Joanna: You should know by now that size doesn�t matter! Elle: Oh, dear, oh dear, here I was thinking that I was liberated and all, and can stand up and declare with a straight face that for me size does not matter as far as a man�s penis goes! If I did that, I would be telling a big, fat lie. Lorna: But I hear that those big d**ks are weak. I don�t really know how small ones feel. The small ones are for Chinese and Japanese so I don�t expect our men here to be that small. Joanna: Lorna, please, stop calling it that! It sounds dirty. Just call it a penis. Ok? And leave the Orientals out of this. You don�t have to rub it in. Stella: So Lorna you agree with Elle and I that at the end of the day, size does matter! Lorna: You know what, when I am in my Namboole, I want to feel the ball kick here and there. So medium, strong and sharp is good for me. (Namboole ist das Fu�ballstadion zwischen Jinja und Kampala, wo die L�nderspiele stattfinden) Joanna: So Elle likes it big, you like it medium. I will take it anyway it comes as long as the presenter knows how to put it to good use. Elle: Count me out as far as that talk of �size does not matter, but the way he uses what he has� is concerned. Jeez, men with tiny ones really have a problem now that I talk about it. I want my man endowed. Stella: Depends on how you define �endowed� for me. I am sure if [a Kampala contractor] reputed to carry a tonne in his pants so much as winked my way, I would take off faster than Akii Bua! (Akii Bua ist der ber�hmteste ugandische Kurzstreckenl�ufer, er hat eine Goldmedaiille im 200 m Lauf bei den olympischen Spielen in M�nchen geholt) Lorna: I have heard about him too, hahahaha� I hear that big d**ks can�t go through without being supported. And I imagine you may not enjoy kissing it... Joanna: Aha! Elle what if you get a really big one and he splits you up? You spend the whole time pleading that he stops. That is not making love; it is called torture. Elle: I, Elle cannot deal with little ones, so help me God. Medium-sized, uhmmmm maybe, but big is fine. I need the real thing, not a cocktail cucumber. You know those cucumbers they cut into tiny bits at cocktail parties that you dip in sauce and chew at? Joanna: Even those cocktail cucumbers; with the right sauce, they are delectable. And I have heard tales about how arrogant the endowed guys are; that they lie back and hope the size works the magic. Stella: Eh! You�re really on the defensive here� Joanna: No, I just don�t see how I can pass up on a nice guy with husband material just because his gizmo is petite. And don�t bring up Danny. I don�t kiss and tell. Elle: Anyway, I am not a charity case and will not take what other women will not have. He either has something I can see, touch and feel, or he takes his �cigarette� elsewhere it can be accommodated. I am not one for small boys. Stella: Bannange Elle�! Your ka-driver could be eavesdropping. Elle: Good. Just as well he knows the stakes in case he starts getting ideas.One of these days I should give Stella a reason not to call me �ka� again! At least now I know what boss harbours under all those Agbada outfits from his home in Lagos! Here comes the lecturer with the documents now� _______________________________________________ Ugandanet mailing list [email protected] http://kym.net/mailman/listinfo/ugandanet % UGANDANET is generously hosted by INFOCOM http://www.infocom.co.ug/
