RE: [UC] Wanted -- Concrete Planter

[Turner,Kathleen]

Title: Message

I should know better than this, but I can't resist:   HEAD KNIGHT:  We want... a shrubbery!       [dramatic chord]   ARTHUR:  A what?   HEAD KNIGHT:  Nee!  Nee!   ARTHUR and PARTY:  Oh, ow!   ARTHUR:  Please, please!  No more!  We shall find a shrubbery.   HEAD KNIGHT:  You must return here with a shrubbery or else you will       never pass through this wood alive!   ARTHUR:  O Knights of Nee, you are just and fair, and we will return       with a shrubbery.   HEAD KNIGHT:  One that looks nice.   ARTHUR:  Of course.   HEAD KNIGHT:  And not too expensive.   ARTHUR:  Yes.   HEAD KNIGHTS:  Now... go!    -    -      -  ARTHUR:  Old crone!  Is there anywhere in this town where we could buy   a shrubbery!       [dramatic chord]   CRONE:  Who sent you?   ARTHUR:  The Knights Who Say Nee.   CRONE:  Agh!  No!  Never!  We have no shrubberies here.   ARTHUR:  If you do not tell us where we can buy a shrubbery, my friend       and I will say... we will say... `nee'.   CRONE:  Agh!  Do your worst!   ARTHUR:  Very well!  If you will not assist us voluntarily,... nee!   CRONE:  No!  Never!  No shrubberies!   ARTHUR:  Nee!   BEDEMIR:  Noo!  Noo!   ARTHUR:  No, no, no, no -- it's not that, it's 'nee'.   BEDEMIR:  Noo!   ARTHUR:  No, no -- 'nee'.  You're not doing it properly.   BEDEMIR:  Noo!  Nee!   ARTHUR:  That's it, that's it, you've got it.   ARTHUR and BEDEMIR:  Nee!  Nee!   ROGER:  Are you saying 'nee' to that old woman?   ARTHUR:  Um, yes.   ROGER:  Oh, what sad times are these when passing ruffians can say `nee'       at will to old ladies.  There is a pestilence upon this land, nothing       is sacred.  Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under       considerable economic stress at this period in history.   ARTHUR:  Did you say `shrubberies'?   ROGER:  Yes, shrubberies are my trade -- I am a shrubber.  My name       is Roger the Shrubber.  I arrange, design, and sell shrubberies.   BEDEMIR:  Nee!   ARTHUR:  No!  No, no, no!  No! Scene 31 ARTHUR: O, Knights of Nee, we have brought you your shrubbery. May we go now? HEAD KNIGHT: It is a good shrubbery. I like the laurels particularly. But there is one small problem. ARTHUR: What is that? HEAD KNIGHT: We are now... no longer the Knights Who Say Nee. RANDOM: Nee! HEAD KNIGHT: Shh shh. We are now the Knights Who Say Ecky-ecky-ecky- ecky-pikang-zoom-boing-mumble-mumble. RANDOM: Nee! HEAD KNIGHT: Therefore, we must give you a test. ARTHUR: What is this test, O Knights of-- Knights Who 'Til Recently Said Nee? HEAD KNIGHT: Firstly, you must find... another shrubbery! [dramatic chord] ARTHUR: Not another shrubbery! HEAD KNIGHT: Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must place it here beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher so you get a two-level effect with a little path running down the middle. RANDOM: A path! A path! Nee! HEAD KNIGHT: Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must cut down the mightiest tree in the forest... with... a herring! [dramatic chord] ARTHUR: We shall do no such thing! HEAD KNIGHT: Oh, please! ARTHUR: Cut down a tree with a herring? It can't be done. -----Original Message----- From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Friday, March 26, 2004 10:46 AM To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Subject: [UC] Wanted -- Concrete Planter Does anybody know where I can get a used concrete planter, not too expensive? I'm also looking for an antique clawfoot bathtub, and some nice shrubberies. And don't tell me to go to Home Depot or Walmart, I don't have a car.     Ross Bender http://rossbender.org