Hi, a few comments.
1. IANA Considerations section is not properly aligned with the draft text: In particular, the STARTTLS Validation Result Types initial entries in Section 6.5 don't include the " certificate-not-trusted" and the "dane-required" reasons listed in Section 4.3.2. 2. Section 4.4. For DANE TLSA policies, a JSON array array of strings each representing the RDATA of a single TLSA resource record as a space- separated list of its four TLSA fields (in RFC6698 Section 2.2) presentation form with no internal spaces or grouping parentheses: ["3 0 1 1F850A337E6DB9C609C522D136A475638CC43E1ED424F8EEC8513D747D1D085D", 3 0 1 12350A337E6DB9C6123522D136A475638CC43E1ED424F8EEC8513D747D1D1234"] MTA-STS (array of JSON strings): ["version: STSv1","mode: report","mx: mx1.example.com","mx: mx2.example.com","mx: mx.backup-example.com","max_age: 12345678"] It seems to me that the description of MTA-STS policy example is too brief comparing to the description of DANE policy example. Is it possible to expand it a bit? And I also think that a reference to MTA-STS policy definition from [I-D.ietf-uta-mta-sts] is appropriate here (or in the bullet text above). 3. In Appendix B: Figure: Example JSON report for a messages from Company-X to Company- Y, where 100 sessions were attempted to Company Y servers with an expired certificate and 200 sessions were attempted to Company Y servers that did not successfully respond to the "STARTTLS" command. "Figure:" looks strange here, since the example above has no any title. I suggest to s/Figure/Above. Even better would be to move this para to the beginning of the section (Appendix B), so that first it is described what is this example about and then the example follows. In this case s/Figure:/Below is. And one more thing in this para: "a messages" - is it a typo? And on Viktor's comment: > A small editorial comment: > > Old: > > For DANE TLSA policies, a JSON array array of strings each > representing the RDATA of a single TLSA resource record as a space- > separated list of its four TLSA fields (in RFC6698 Section 2.2) > presentation form with no internal spaces or grouping parentheses: > > New: > > For DANE TLSA policies, a JSON array of strings each > representing the RDATA of a single TLSA resource record as a space- > separated list of its four TLSA fields in (RFC6698 Section 2.2) > presentation form with no internal spaces or grouping parentheses: > > That is, drop the duplication of "array" and > > s/fields (in /fields in (/ It seems to me that the new sentence is still too long and a bit hard to parse. Is it possible to rephrase it? Something along the lines: For DANE TLSA policies, a JSON array of strings each representing the RDATA of a single TLSA resource record as a space- separated list of its four TLSA fields; the fields are in presentation format (defined in RFC6698 Section 2.2) with no internal spaces or grouping parentheses: (hope this doesn't change its meaning). Regards, Valery. _______________________________________________ Uta mailing list Uta@ietf.org https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/uta