Citizens:
It pains me to see such an ugly politcal fight
go on before your voting eyes these hot
summer days.
That Pike fellow who called me a mayor who
governs from a tree limb after be chased there
by a bear.
That greasy ambulance chasing Neil Bentley
spreading scandelous rumors about my
involvement in some highway real estate deal
out by the Silar City Stuckeys.
That farmer Frisbee story continues to unfold
into what may well be the mother of all
corruption stories to wash over our lovely
town.
Yea I say to you, loyal voter, who would
you have?
Would you like that Porky Pig like Pike
fellow who bends at the slightest wind and
cannot resist any deal that crosses his palm
and who associates with the likes of
that dubious lawyer Bentley, credentialed
from who knows where and worst of all
the "Al Capone" of Mt. Airy, Fiendish
Farmer Frisbee...would you sleep well
at night with those creatures in charge.
Rest easy friends!
Vote Stoner for Mayor and be confident
that you've done the right thing.
I'm Stoner and I approve of this message.
Paid for by Silar City Stuckeys Corp. Ltd.
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