"A meeting has been set up next month in which President Obama will get a
private audience with Britain's Queen Elizabeth. She'd like the President to
explain once and for all to Oprah that SHE is the queen."
- Tim Hunter, wackyweek.com
--------------------
Opposition
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=20cb76d6a974a7213d7390fe8d52d3cc
--------------------
Health Care Update:
"Wallet successfully removed. Operation completed."
--------------------
He's Fine....
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=6a41f8e8e960f62b7d4407478d56abd4
--------------------
Republicans Split On Need To Offer Rival For Budget
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/03/14/us/politics/14budget.html
Congressional Republicans are engaged in a highly coordinated political assault
on President Obama's budget, but they are not so united when it comes to
offering an alternative to the spending plan they have been shredding as
irresponsible. ...
"As I told my colleagues, we don't have enough votes to legislate," said
Representative John A. Boehner of Ohio, the Republican leader. "We are not in
the majority. We are not kind-of in the minority; we are in a hole. They ought
to get the idea out of their minds that they are legislators. But what they can
be is communicators." ...
[great.... "the party of no" has become "the party of not one f...@#king thing"]
--------------------
Can You Believe....
http://us.cnn.com/POLITICS/analysis/toons/2009/03/12/lang/
--------------------
Liberal ideas:
Quality public education, health care, civil rights, a clean environment, a
level playing field for businesses....
Gotta hate that.
--------------------
Hypocrisy
http://us.cnn.com/POLITICS/analysis/toons/2009/03/12/mitchell/
--------------------
"Katie Couric is trying to interview Rush Limbaugh. Then I thought, didn't
Katie already do a probing in-depth interview of Rush Limbaugh? Then I
remembered, no, that was the video of Katie's colonoscopy. Easy mistake."
- Alex Kaseberg
--------------------
Q: What's the difference between Jupiter and Rush Limbaugh?
A: One is gaseous giant with a core of rock surrounded by a poisonous
atmosphere; the other is just a planet.
--------------------
Yeah, You Sure Showed Him!!
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=8547de3ef8f497519c4b6c7c7b085bc9
--------------------
"Two thirds of Republicans say they feel their party has no leader. Apparently
they are the ones who don't have access to AM radio."
- Jim Barach
--------------------
Post Partisan
http://www.xoverboard.com/cartoons/2009/090316_partisan.html
--------------------
I don't know if it's true or not, but a deal is supposedly in the works for
Norm Coleman to quit his challenge of Al Franken's recount win for the U.S.
Senate seat in Minnesota.
No quid pro quo, but President Obama will then appoint Coleman to be the U.S.
ambassador to Japan.
Apparently Norm is wildly popular there, as he evokes the memory of those
Japanese WWII soldiers in the Philippines and other Pacific islands who refused
to leave the mountains and surrender even though they knew the war was over.
--------------------
Redcoat Holdouts Still Fighting American Revolution
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/redcoat_holdouts_still_fighting
--------------------
"According to Star Magazine, Sarah Palin's daughter, Bristol, broke up with her
boyfriend Levi Johnston. It was good news for Sarah Palin, because after she
returned all the clothes to the GOP party, she didn't have anything to wear for
the wedding."
- Pedro Bartes
--------------------
State's Predator Kills Are Out Of Control
http://tinyurl.com/dlmuyr
The [Alaska] Board of Game and Department of Fish and Game aim - or at least
hope - to kill up to 60 percent of the 2,500 to 3,000 black bears that, in
their opinion, prey upon an unacceptably high number of moose calves in Unit
16B, a huge area that extends from the foothills of the Alaska Range to Cook
Inlet and from the Yentna River southwest to Redoubt Creek (which flows off the
rumbling Redoubt Volcano).
Sixty percent! If that's not a slaughter, what is? (The state admits it is
unlikely to reach that goal, but why not shoot for the moon, eh?)...
And Ben Grussendorf, the most moderate member of the Board (which isn't saying
much), described his initial gut reaction to several proposed changes this way:
"Man, this is a jihad against black bears by paramilitary groups." ...
There's plenty of other upsetting stuff that happened at the meeting, at least
to one who prefers that more than a token few bears and wolves roam
state-managed lands, but I'd like to point out one in particular: the Board's
decision to allow children 10 to 15 years old to participate in Unit 16's
bear-kill program, except for snaring.
Bob Bell, to my surprise and his credit, opposed the idea: "Bringing kids into
the hunting fraternity under predator control is a bad idea."
But Spraker, who's taught hunter-education, found great merit in the idea of
having kids kill bears over bait, no matter if some of those bears happen to be
moms with tiny cubs. Or even the cubs themselves. "I think it could be exciting
for a 10-year-old," he said. ...
Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh My!
http://www.themudflats.net/wp-content/uploads/witchone-500x340.jpg
http://www.themudflats.net/2009/03/13/ill-get-you-my-prettyand-that-little-wolf-too-palins-war-on-wildlife-continues/
--------------------
"Bristol Palin and Levi Johnson have broken up. That's right. That's right. And
apparently it was not that big a surprise. Even the Russians saw it coming... I
think secretly, Rush Limbaugh wanted them to fail... But right about now, Sarah
Palin is in a helicopter hunting for the boyfriend with her rifle."
- David Letterman
--------------------
Obama Policies Make U.S. Less Safe: Cheney
http://www.cbc.ca/world/story/2009/03/15/cheney-obama.html
The former U.S. vice-president is accusing President Barack Obama of making the
country less safe.
Dick Cheney said in a Cable News Network interview Sunday he thinks it's a bad
idea to ban waterboarding, close the Guantanamo Bay detention centre in Cuba
and stop labelling detainees as enemy combatants.
Cheney said those controversial moves by the administration of George W. Bush
helped stop a long list of attacks against the United States. ...
Cheney said specific attacks were stopped, but added he could not talk about
them because the intelligence gathered through the anti-terror programs remains
classified.
--------------------
US Torture: Voices from the Black Sites
http://www.nybooks.com/articles/22530
Contents
Introduction
1. Main Elements of the CIA Detention Program
1.1 Arrest and Transfer
1.2 Continuous Solitary Confinement and Incommunicado Detention
1.3 Other Methods of Ill-treatment
1.3.1 Suffocation by water
1.3.2 Prolonged Stress Standing
1.3.3 Beatings by use of a collar
1.3.4 Beating and kicking
1.3.5 Confinement in a box
1.3.6 Prolonged nudity
1.3.7 Sleep deprivation and use of loud music
1.3.8 Exposure to cold temperature/cold water
1.3.9 Prolonged use of handcuffs and shackles
1.3.10 Threats
1.3.11 Forced shaving
1.3.12 Deprivation/restricted provision of solid food
1.4 Further elements of the detention regime....
--------------------
The Benefits of Torture
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=094533bfe4854b62b2fa1dbf601d58db
--------------------
"Dick" Cheney claims President Bush "kept us safe," but he can't tell us
how.... here are some ways I'VE been keeping my family safe, and I'm not afraid
to tell YOU how!!!
- I bought an extra garland of garlic to hang in my kitchen, to keep away the
vampires.... and I haven't been bitten once!
- My Yorkie keeps us safe from elephant invasions.... there hasn't been a
single one since she came to live with us.
- I replaced the light bulb on my front porch, and I haven't been bothered by a
single mob of flesh eating zombies since then.
--------------------
Do tinfoil hats need digital converter boxes?
--------------------
Dear Dick Cheney,
I had to listen to your paranoia for eight years.
You're gone now, so go home and violate your own rights for a change.
Thank You (anonymously),
- A.Citizen
--------------------
"The government's terror watch list is now up to a million people. Apparently
the only place the people on the list ever go is to the airport."
- Jim Barach
--------------------
"South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford likened President Obama's fiscal policies
to Zimbabwe's Tuesday and warned we could get hyperinflation like Zimbabwe's.
His meaning is clear. Leave it to South Carolina to fire the first shot in
every Civil War."
- Argus Hamilton
--------------------
Texas, Too....
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=d0824ce46df38c587e6c6cb2e45ac428
--------------------
"Bernie Madoff pleaded guilty Tuesday to swindling victims out of fifty billion
dollars and faces one hundred fifty years in jail. That's not enough time.
Thanks to embryonic stem cell research, Bernie Madoff's best years could still
be ahead of him."
- Argus Hamilton
--------------------
At Least....
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=2a63ca7759cd34ff1bbb57ea6e491305
--------------------
"Bernard Madoff is now in jail. And by the end of the first day he already
owned most of the cigarettes of the entire inmate population."
- Pedro Bartes
--------------------
Some New Jewelry
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=a34711c7b09c5ffc60fda3c22e187a11
--------------------
"Bernie Madoff is now in a small, dark, smelly holding cell in the Manhattan
Correctional Center. It's so small and dirty that if it were a studio apartment
across the street, it wouldn't sell for a penny over $1.7 million."
- Jake Novak
--------------------
Bernie Madoff's cell is reportedly the size of a walk-in closet. But when
Bernie saw it, he said: "Hah! You call that a closet?"
- Bill Mihalic
--------------------
Maybe If....
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=f5f3f5961e82f49e0b09dbcc785343b6
--------------------
"Bernie Madoff and his wife are worth a reported $823 Million. Their
possessions include a $2.2 Million boat called "Bull". Apparently they were
caught before they could get someone to paint on the second word in the name."
- Jim Barach
--------------------
In the take-over frenzy, Rumor Control has it that IKEA is going to take over
GM....
http://www.redzonefilms.com/pics2/ikea.jpg
--------------------
"Citigroup is accepting nominations to fill four vacancies on its board of
directors. The bank is looking for new directors who have extensive experience
with panhandling."
- Jake Novak
--------------------
The Nationalization Debate
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=ef32e6d79a68e56275810d97a7ce1059
--------------------
Bailout King AIG Still To Pay Millions In Bonuses
http://tinyurl.com/bmrksu
Insurance giant American International Group will award hundreds of millions of
dollars in employee bonuses and retention pay despite a confrontation Wednesday
between the chief executive and Treasury Secretary Timothy F. Geithner. ...
The bonuses and other payments have been exasperating government officials, who
have committed $170 billion to keep the company afloat -- far more than has
been offered to any other financial firm.
The issue came to a head when Geithner called Liddy and told him the payments
were unacceptable and had to be renegotiated, said an administration official
who was not authorized to comment on the Geithner conversation.
In a letter to Geithner yesterday, Liddy agreed to restructure some of the
payments. But Liddy said he had "grave concerns" about the impact on the firm's
ability to retain talented staff "if employees believe that their compensation
is subject to continued and arbitrary adjustment by the U.S. Treasury." ...
--------------------
Lifeline
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=4afd25f8c5607e2c2dcf38b61f9e8696
--------------------
AIG payes retention bonuses just because.... because?!?
I thought bonuses were based on profit/loss. A guaranteed retention bonus does
not guarantee quality work, as we now can see.
Arseholds.... there are NO bonuses for failure.
--------------------
"The Las Vegas Convention and Visitors Authority says that 340 planned events
there have been canceled in the past three months. The problem is that most of
those were set up by executives from AIG."
- Jim Barach
--------------------
Silver Lining?
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=7c802ecb8a67eafd553c35c9247bfbc1
--------------------
IN NEW TERROR VIDEO, AIG DEMANDS HUGE RANSOM FROM U.S.
Shadowy Group Seeks Bonuses, Golf Retreats
American intelligence experts are analyzing a new terror video from the
American International Group (AIG) in which the leader of the shadowy
organization demands billions of dollars from the United States.
In the four-minute tape, which surfaced over the weekend and caused deep
concern among U.S. officials, a man believed to be the chairman of AIG says
that if his organization is not paid its ransom, "chaos and destruction will
rain down on the American economy."
"If we are not paid billions more in bonuses and corporate golf retreats,
America will be made to suffer," the man threatens.
Intelligence analysts said that the man, AIG chairman Edward M. Liddy, appears
to be speaking at a luxury beach resort that offers few clues as to his exact
location, although there is "good intelligence" pointing to the Ritz Carlton in
the Cayman Islands.
"We have some reason to believe that he and other AIG executives are there,
based on a series of intercepted room service orders from the all-day dining
menu," one analyst said.
Reacting to the video, Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano raised the
nation's terror alert level to orange, meaning "taxpayers are about to get
reamed again."
Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner also released a response to AIG's latest
demands, but intelligence experts said they would need several weeks to
decipher Mr. Geithner's response.
© Andy Borowitz
borowitzreport.com
--------------------
"Members of Congress are outraged that bailed-out AIG is paying out $165
million in bonuses to the same executives who destroyed the company. It's kind
of like when the taxpayers are forced to give pay raises to the same Members of
Congress who destroyed the country."
- Jake Novak
--------------------
Octo-Dad
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=45c839cdf8d171abcc0c2faa00b651dd
--------------------
AIG Bonuses Are Unconscionable
Congress Will Examine Legal Options to Recover Taxpayer Funds
March 15th, 2009 by Speaker Pelosi
http://www.speaker.gov/blog/?p=1726
While American workers see their wages decline and face record job losses, it
is unconscionable that AIG, which is receiving more than $170 billion in
government assistance, would permit such extravagant executive compensation
practices without any accountability to the taxpayer.
I have asked Chairman Barney Frank of the House Financial Services Committee to
examine options that are legally available to recover taxpayer funds of
companies that abuse the privilege of taxpayer assistance.
I call upon the executives at AIG to right the wrong they have done to American
taxpayers, who are footing the bill for the most expensive government rescue in
history. They should renounce the bonuses and refuse the excessive retention
pay they previously agreed to. ...
--------------------
Finance Charges
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=109022eaa2136d20758c8c8397e1c96d
--------------------
"The economic downturn has forced layoffs at the Children's Television
Workshop. It's getting so bad that Ernie and Bert had to move into Oscars'
garbage can."
- Jake Novak
--------------------
"'Sesame Street' is laying off some of its staff because of the recession
Apparently they were told that the layoffs were brought to them by the letters
'B', 'U', 'S', and 'H'."
- Jim Barach
--------------------
Money is like manure....
It works best spread around, else you just have a big pile of shit.
--------------------
"Hooverville" Redux
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=7a188866f7249fe8215a88ecf8bcbe9a
--------------------
"A new study shows that Americans have lost 17.9% of their net worth over the
past year. Luckily, another study shows that most Americans don't have the
basic math skills to understand what 17.9% is."
- Jake Novak
--------------------
The American Dream
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=a7afa9e13cc8adb8af716c964d5f97a4
--------------------
"Give you an idea of how bad the economy is. Rush Limbaugh down to just three
meals a day. That's how bad it is."
- Jay Leno
*******************
Economists Panic!!!
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=434e477d245f7856cb8afa3f000f882a
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