Re: [wc] Gotta love Carolyn!

Wed, 16 Aug 2006 10:00:37 -0700

I think that a huge part of having a daughter who respects herself and doesn't sleep around is having a father who is in her life and loves her. My father's love was not unconditional and when I couldn't get it I wanted that love and acceptance from any guy. The one thing I had that they wanted was, well, we all know right. In the big picture I got lucky... I didn't get HIV, I didn't get pregnant, I didn't get hepititus or general herpies... I did however get an STD and am HPV +. I have had cryosurgery to remove precancerous cells from my cervix (Some places are not meant to be frozen!!) all because of bad decisions as a teenager. So I will talk with my daughter openly about this... I am NOT again premarital sex... I am against unprotected sex. I'm also huge into getting yourself off but that's another story.
Also my church has an amzing sex ed program that my daughter will go to...
http://www.uua.org/owl/
Just my 2 cents.
Daria

 
On 8/16/06, Ellen <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:

Did you see Hax's column today? Oh, man. Telling it like it is, as
usual.

TELL ME ABOUT IT ®

By Carolyn Hax
Washington Post Staff Writer
Wednesday, August 16, 2006; C09

Dear Carolyn:

Do you have specific advice for teenagers (especially girls) to keep
them from premarital sex, or are you one who smiles and says, "You
are not mature, but if you must, here is a condom." I need every
trick in the book to make sure my kids never go down that road!

Richmond

No, you don't. You need a clear, coherent, lifelong, well-thought-out
message that reflects your values and shows respect both for your
kids' intelligence and for the strength of their hormones.

And, your kids need to know your love isn't contingent upon their
following the exact road you choose for them, because they aren't
going to follow it; you might as well accept that now. If they know
you will love them regardless, though, and if you teach them the
importance of making good choices, they'll find their own way, for
their own reasons -- which seems like the whole point. In fact, the
better you raise them, the more independent-minded they'll be.

Tricks, on the other hand, are advance admissions of defeat,
declarations that your kids can't control themselves and so you must
try to control them. Your pressure is annoying, too -- and the
annoyed kids of parents who fear premarital sex know exactly how to
get their revenge.


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