Hi Sanjukta!

Thanks for this-- I've droned on on this list before about how I really
feel that translation is in fact creative work, in fact the writing of
poetry itself; and just as difficult!  So please do put this kind of work.

I have some suggestions/comments towards revision, but will do that when
there's a bit more time or when we meet again offline.

Cheers
Vivek

>     hello to all the poets,
>
>  I am not sure if i am supposed to put this kind of
>  work on the mailing list.  i am also not sure whether
>  this at all is my "creative work".
>
>  its a small extract from Tagore's Musical Drama
>  "Shyama" which I have dared to translate.  Pls excuse.
>
>
>  thanks
>
>  Shyama -
>  Forgive me my Love
>  What is the curse for the sin I did, let the almighty
>  bestow upon me
>  You forgive me
>  My sin was not in thy Book, sinner I am in God's feet
>  There God shall unleash his rage, retribution be
>  silently accepted by me
>  Never shall be able to bear your unforgiveness
>
>  Bajrasen -
>  Forgive her I could not
>  Forgive my powerlessness my Lord
>  My love was crying My love was dying
>  of shame of remorse
>  Alas I could not take her in my arms
>  I hurt my love, sin I did to punish sin
>  Forgiven she would be by thee, she who falls tumbling
>  on thy feet of shoulder loaded with sin
>  Know I this my Lord, that thou shall never forgive me,
>  never forgive me for my mercilessness.
>
>  >From 'Shyama'
>
>
>
>  Sanjukta
>
>  http://thisismytruth.rediffblogs.com
>
>
>
>
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