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Dieting Rules

If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.

If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are 
canceled out by the diet soda.

When you eat with someone else, calories don’t count if you don’t eat more than 
they do.

Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER counts, such as hot chocolate, brandy, 
toast and Sara Lee Cheesecake.

If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.

Movie-related foods (Milk Duds, buttered popcorn, Junior Mints, Red Hots, 
Tootsie Rolls, etc.) do not have additional calories because they are part of 
the entertainment package and not part of one’s personal fuel.

Cookie pieces contain no calories — the process of breaking causes calorie 
leakage.

Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the process 
of preparing something. Examples are peanut butter on a knife making a sandwich 
and ice cream on a spoon making a sundae.

Foods that have the same color have the same number of calories. Examples are: 
spinach and pistachio ice cream; mushrooms and white chocolate. NOTE: Chocolate 
is a universal color and may be substituted for any other food color.

Anything consumed while standing over the kitchen sink, has no calories.

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