I haven't been able to read all the email messages but I want to and will answer them slowly. Everyone's prayers and words I'm sure will help me to go on and hopefully recover. Thank you David and you are right about the rules. My email address for anyone who wishes to write to me is fiog...@rogers.com Thank you so much and hope to be healed and come back soon. Sincerely Zoe
-----Original Message----- From: JAWS-Users-List [mailto:jaws-users-list-boun...@jaws-users.com] On Behalf Of Dave Sent: April 27, 2017 11:15 PM To: jaws-users-list@jaws-users.com Subject: Re: [JAWS-Users] sorry off topic prayers and unsubscribe soon David, Very well handled. Dave Oregonian, woodworker, Engineer, Musician, and Pioneer ----- Original Message ----- From: "David Ferrin" <ow...@jaws-users.com> To: <jaws-users-list@jaws-users.com> Sent: Thursday, April 27, 2017 15:51 Subject: Re: [JAWS-Users] sorry off topic prayers and unsubscribe soon This is a heart breaker for sure. If I enforce the rules then I would have to get all hard case, but in this situation I do not wish to do that as she is dealing with such a trajaty in her life. Yet if I don't then those folks who depend on us following the guidelines will feel like I let them down. This is one of those many times that I do not like sitting in the big chair so to speak. I think that possibly she might be so kind as to post her personal email address on here so people can contact her with their respective messages of support. I have one that I will share with her alone and not on the list as it is not for public viewing. I have her email address, but then again I have everybody's' email address as whenever anybody comes or goes it crosses my desk alerting me of such things. What do you say Zoe, do you want to post your personal address so folks can contact you privately? Trust me in the past couple of years this house has had its share of problems and major operations. So I know what difficulties arise in a persons' life. -----Original Message----- From: wayne smith Sent: Thursday, April 27, 2017 5:49 PM To: jaws-users-list@jaws-users.com Subject: Re: [JAWS-Users] sorry off topic prayers and unsubscribe soon Dear Zoe, please know that we are praying for you as you bare a heavy cross. We will send out your prayer request to all who we know will pray. Wayne -----Original Message----- From: JAWS-Users-List [mailto:jaws-users-list-boun...@jaws-users.com] On Behalf Of zoe fiogkos Sent: Thursday, April 27, 2017 2:35 PM To: jaws-users-list@jaws-users.com Subject: [JAWS-Users] sorry off topic prayers and unsubscribe soon Hi my fellow elf's and Mrs. Clause. Hope you are all doing ok. Unfortunately I have no choice, I have to unsubscribe from all the email groups I belong to. I haven't been able to check email and be online for a long time and it seems I will be out of things for much longer. When I turned on my laptop this morning I had over fifteen thousand emails waiting for me. Given my situation I just can't keep up anymore. I pray that one day I recover and are able to join my favourite groups again. My family is against me telling people what's wrong but I feel in writing this email I'm also helping myself to come to grips with my illness. I will remain subscribed a few more days so that I may read your thoughts in hopes that your words might help me to continue to fight this awful illness. Again I'm sorry for the off topic post and I hope the moderators can find it in their hearts to forgive me, and if one day I recover I hope they will remember me and let me back in to my favourite mailing groups. Before I tell you all my story, I would like to thank each and every one of you for either your help on various topics, or your individual private help through the phone or private email, or your messages of getting to know me, or your words of encouragement when it came to the mac, jaws, NVDA, windows 10, household tips, cooking instructions, prayers, and harmless chit chat. If I offended anyone in anyway, or gave anyone a hard time please forgive me. Here's my unbelievable story. Last August I was doing a lot of gardening mostly weeding to be honest. I was on my hands and knees from morning to night pulling weeds and keeping my property clean. I am grateful to the good Lord for blessing me to have such a lovely property but it's old and no one ever took care of the garden. The result is weeds on top of my weeds. Chemicals are forbidden here in Canada, and I haven't been able to find an affordable solution, so I'm left with fighting weeds on a daily bases. I am a sun lover and adore summer, last summer was the first time in my life that I couldn't wait for summer to be over. I was exhausted and I have nothing to remember for my 2016 summer except pulling weeds all most every day for the whole entire spring, summer, and fall. In August I noticed 2 mosquito bites on my elbow and 2 on my inner left thigh. The bites were very itchy just like normal mosquito bites, so I didn't think anything of it. I also noticed my nails were black underneath. I thought it was dirt from the garden, to spite that I was showering every single day and cleaning my nails, the next morning they would be filthy again. Again I thought it strange but I justified it in my head as to much gardening. In August my husband and I visited a few local restaurants and spent two nights in a motel in north Ontario for a weekend away. I wanted to try my hand at building a small business doing something I love so I decided to start making my own bracelets and selling them online. I have always loved costume jewellery and to spite my vision problems, I have been taught that there is nothing I can't do. My mother always said "try and if you fail, oh well, life goes on. Try different things until you find something you are good at and you love doing." So I talked to my mom and husband and they both backed me as they always do. My mother who adores me spent over six thousand dollars to buy my supplies, and encouraged me on a daily bases. My husband turned half of my computer room into a work space with special lighting, magnifying contraptions, shelving, etc. My husband and mom bought me bins with dividers and I spent months sorting beads and other supplies by color, size, and type. I got help from someone on one of these mailing lists and he helped me to create labels to label all these bins. Everything was going great, or so I thought. I spent hours teaching myself how to make these beautiful bracelets, I finally got the hang of it after much trial and error and I was ready to go. I registered on etsy.com and opened up a Facebook small business page. I bought more supplies to host a launching party with food, drinks, and gifts for my guests to introduce them to my creations and my new business. While all this was happening, I noticed in October that the mosquito bites were not going away. They had become scabby and even more itchier. I showed my mom and she justified it just like I had done in my mind. Due to my type two diabetes they were taking a long time to heal as many things do when you have diabetes. At the beginning of November as some of you already know, I started to have problems with my right eye. Long story short for those who don't know, I suffer from a cornea disease. My cornea was trying to break. This had happened before but this time it was persistent and my doctor had to try different medications to stop the cornea from breaking. While I was battling this cornea problem I noticed my right arm becoming very itchy and the two mosquito bites had now become 10. I was so worried about my eye that I put this arm problem aside until I solve this cornea issue. I thought I was having an allergic reaction to something. By the beginning of December my whole entire arm from the elbow down was covered in scabby itchy pimples. I thought oh my God what's going on? I changed my soap, detergent, and started to watch what I was eating. Due to the cornea problem and the Christmas holidays I didn't get to my family doctor until January. By January both my arms were covered in these strange itchy things. The doctor looked at my arms and fingers and said oh don't worry it's nothing, you have scabies. Pardon my language but I answered what the hell is scabies? She said it's a bug sometimes humans get. Usually from sex but since your husband doesn't have it and you didn't cheat on him you got it from the motel you stayed at, or from a shopping mall, or someone hugged you who has it. She continued on to say it will be gone in a few weeks. She said it's contagious but since you will be treating yourself in the next week don't worry about it. She gave me a lotion with pesticide in it and told me to apply it to my whole body from the knec down before bedtime and shower after 12 hours in the morning. She said do not apply to face and scalp because scabies don't go there and it's not safe. She said repeat this process one week later. During this week of treatment vacuum the house every day and wash linens and all clothing warn every day. So off I went astonished at what I had heard. Where the heck did I get something like this. Oh well I thought it will soon be over, or so I believed. On my way to the pharmacy to pick up the lotion full of embarrassment I kept on thinking about the doctor's words when she said to me, "zoe I know you are a clean person and your house is clean but this illness has nothing to do with cleanliness, rich, or pour. Anyone can contract this disease. She continued on to say because you are type 2 diabetic your immune system is compromised and so it's easier for you to catch something like this. The scabby pimples on your arms, are the bugs laying eggs and leaving their pheacies behind. The body has an allergic reaction to those things. I cried all the way to the pharmacy. I went home and began the treatment as the doctor had described. My husband and I slept in separate bedrooms and I kept away from my mom just encase. I put my bracelet business on hold thinking it's only a few weeks. I laundered every day running my clothing through the dryer three times to make sure I kill everything that could be on my clothing. I got depressed but my family reminded me of everything the doctor told me and I was consoled and thought to myself what am I crying about this will be over soon. Boy was I wrong. One week later when I was finished the treatment I was still itchy and the scabs were still there. I called the doctor and she confirmed what I had read online that the body would slowly extract the pheacies and eggs and eventually the itchiness would go away, it would take about six weeks for everything to return to normal. By the way by mid-January I could no longer sleep, the itchiness would keep me up all night itching, burning and crying from pain and sleeplessness. During January I attended the funeral of a beloved older man who had passed away suddenly and I had visited his widow and also I visited a 96 year old woman who I have known since I was born, who is like a grandma to me, not to mention the hospital visits for my cornea, the Christmas parties and services in my church. I thought my God I hope no one caught this from me and at the thought I was devastated. My family consoled me saying Zoe you didn't know what it was, it's not your fault. During the six week period after the treatment I decided to take precautions just encase. I stopped going to church, visiting people, I didn't allow anyone to come over, I didn't do daily things like banking, grocery shopping, etc. I continued to vacuum every day, cleaned the house diligently, and of course laundry every single day. My husband and I stayed away from each other accept for the occasional peck on the lips quickly. I was miserable but this would soon be over. I began to make Easter plans, my bracelet launching party, plans, and planned for my step daughters visit in the summer to meet our new granddaughter. Things were not as the doctor or I thought. At the end of the six week mark, I was itchier than ever. The pimples had spread to other parts of my body and they were scabbier than ever. I made a doctor's appointment again and off I went. She looked at my body and said "these are scabies I'm absolutely 100% sure, but if the medication didn't work, I don't know what else I can do for you, so I will send you to a specialist, a dermatologist." In the next week after that disappointing appointment I began to feel bugs walking in my hair, nose, and ears. My sleep was next to nothing and it started to show. My hair was down to my waist and I sat in the garage and cut it all off while my mother watched me and cried. My husband went to the drug store and got me extra strength Benadryl to help with the itchiness and sleep. I began to take one every night to knock me out. I started to research my problem online. What I read was not encouraging at all. I began to read horror stories of people who had scabies and couldn't get rid of them because these bugs have become resistant to the medications offered by doctors. Further I read stories of people who were diagnosed with delusional paratosis and some were even locked up in looney bins. I thought to myself, well don't believe everything you read on the internet. Since general medicine couldn't help me and I had gotten the call from the doctor's office that my dermatologist's appointment would not take place until April 10th, I decided to try some home remedies to get rid of them. Here the hell began. I read that diluted bleach in water would kill them. Not true, I smelled like chlorine and about 5 bugs fell off me. I read that 12 days of white vinegar on the body would kill them. I also went to a natural pharmacy and they told me to shower with castile soap every day and let the soap dry on me. When my body absorbed the castile soap then I should slather neem oil all over my body. Neem oil smells like rotten peanuts and or diarrhea in my opinion. Every night for the next 12 days I got in the shower, lathered the soap on me, waited half an hour for it to dry, lathered neem oil on me from head to tow, wore tight clothing to bed, (tights, socks, turtle neck, full flannel sheets, and a thick winter blanket), in the morning I showered with extra strength neem and rosemary soap. After the shower I applied coconut oil to my whole body and then applied vinegar 3 times a day to my whole entire body. This was my life for the next 12 days. Result, every day I would find 20 to 30 dead bugs on my body, so I thought great it's working. At the end of the 12 days my skin was badly burned from the vinegar. Now I had hardly any hair and a burnt body and face. I began to suffer greatly. My body was stinging and hurting and the bugs were not gone. I tried lice shampoo even though I read online that it doesn't work for scabies. They were right it didn't work. I would pick them out with a lice comb every day until my scalp was so badly scratched I couldn't take it anymore. I tried hydrogen peroxide, it did kill many but didn't get rid of them. I researched more online and found a study based in Australia that said that in a study done the only thing that killed resistant scabies was clove oil. They are in the process of developing medicine for scabies with its base being clove oil. I started reading up on people who had used clove oil and most swore that they got rid of them. There were a few people who said it didn't work for them. I went to the natural place and bought bottles of clove oil. I diluted clove oil with coconut oil so that it doesn't burn me and began to apply to my whole body every day. At night I still used the neem oil. Didn't work, I further burned my body and the bugs were still there. Starting to panic because I felt the bug activity getting worse, I took a bottle of castile soap and mixed it with neem oil and began to shower with that. Every time I applied this to my head and body I felt the bugs jumping for fear or joy, who knows with the dam things. I began to leave this on me and waited for 20 minutes before I washed off. They would fall in the tub dead. I thought great something is finally working. After 2 weeks of this, the bugs were still not gone even though 40 50 bugs would fall in the shower every day, sometimes even twice a day. During all of this I read that the only thing that will get rid of them is an old remedy of sulphur soap. I searched high and low in Toronto but no one seemed to have it. Finally I found it on amazon and ordered it along with sulphur cream and sulphur ointment. Finally these things came and a new routine began. Every morning I would shower with the castile neem oil mixture, I would leave it on for 20 minutes and rinse off, then I would lather on the sulphur soap, leave it on for 20 minutes and rinse off. I would get out of the shower and lather on the coconut oil. Thousands of bugs would come out of my skin. My mom and husband would wear gloves and pick them off my skin and dispose of them safely. At night I would lather the neem oil all over me and slather on sulphur ointment on my head and sulphur cream on my face. This continued for about 10 days. The bug population on my skin diminished every day, but at the end of 10 days my skin was blistering and drying so bad I began to have horrible pain. Every time I got in the shower I screamed of pain. I could again not sleep from the pain. However the pimples were now nothing but faded scars, so I thought great this is working so I said to myself clench your teeth and bear it if it means these things would finally be gone. I also found online a sight called earth clinic and they said to drink 1 litre of distilled water mixed with 1/8 teaspoon of borox every day, 5 days on and 2 days off, also to supplement this by drinking half a teaspoon of natural baking soda mixed with half cup of distilled water morning and night. They explained how this destroys a fungus in their gut and doesn't allow them to digest properly and will help to get rid of them if they are in your blood. I also read that the world health organization says untreated people with scabies results in kidney failure, heart failure, and even death in some cases. Obviously with all of this information, pain, treatments, and isolation I began to cry from morning to night and started to suffer physically and emotionally. Bracelet business? What bracelet business. Friends? I couldn't see any friends. Email and computers? Non-existent. Easter was coming, for me the most important and biggest holiday of my faith and existence. I could not go to church, I could not see my goddaughter to give her gifts for Easter. I could not cook or make plans for Easter. I could not take communion. I began to spend my days when not treating in my garage sitting on a plastic chair covered with a plastic bag, swotting the bugs away and crying. With hardly any sleep it was taking its toll on me. I couldn't eat because I was afraid the bugs would fall into my food, I began to lose weight. Even though the pimples were gone, and thousands of dead bugs would come out of my body, even though my skin was now badly damaged the bugs persisted in my scalp and face. My husband wore a plastic bag over his body and with plastic gloves he shaved my head and plucked my eye brows. Now I was a worse looking freak then before. Bald, no eye brows, dermatitis, burnt skin, tired and it showed, and still with bugs. Finally April 10th came and I was so excited to go to the dermatologist and finally get some help. I wore a shower cap and gloves and went to the doctor making sure not to touch anyone or anything for fear of spreading this awful thing to any other human being. I told the doctor everything I have described to you guys, and then it happened my worst fears came true. He looked at my scalp with glasses and examined my skin and said, "you don't have scabies, there are no signs of crusted pimples, it's all in your head." I responded doctor don't you see the scars on my body, I have topically treated for so long that the pimples are gone, but the bugs are still there." He said "no they are not you have delusional paratosis." My husband popped up and said doctor I have seen the bugs coming out of her body, we find them dead in the tub and on her clothing. He answered you guys are nuts, and if there is bugs then prove it put them in a bottle and bring them to me, she has a bad case of dermatitis and she's nuts." I was shocked and couldn't believe my ears, everything I had read on the net was true. I went home and cried until my body could no longer produce any more tears. I contacted other scabie sufferers online and they told me it would be hard to find a doctor to help because they don't want to admit that the meds they give you don't work. Everyone told me that those who chose to take the bottled bugs to the doctor got no results. The doctors refused to examine the bugs or send them for analysis and many of them were forcibly locked up. My family and I had a long conversation and came to the conclusion that the only thing that could help me was the home remedies and we would not take the chance of me being locked up with a diagnosis of delusional paratosis. By this time I could no longer do the sulphur treatment on a daily bases for now I was greatly suffering. I lessoned the sulphur showers to 1 every three days and still my skin was suffering. I throughout my area rugs, laundry hampers, runners, old blankets, computer chairs, I spent no time in my house accept at night to go to bed on my covered bed with heavy duty plastic bags. I wore a shower cap and gloves at night, but the shower cap caused broozes on my head. Easter came and left, and I didn't bake like I do every year, I didn't cook, I didn't go to church, I didn't celebrate with my family, (even though they sent me lots of food and sweets), all I did was cry, swat bugs all day, and continued to treat myself in hopes that this one day would be gone. During all of this my mom who picked the bugs off me every day and cried at the sight of her only child suffering so much developed a lump in her breast, (which we are waiting for results). When she went to the doctor to have this lump checked out she told the secretary what's going on. The secretary who is in her fourth year of becoming a homeopath doctor suggested she try to help me. Her teacher could help me if I could afford to pay her. The Canadian government doesn't cover homeopathic medicine and I have no private insurance, so I'm stuck with a kind hearted student who is paying for my homeopath medicine and trying to help me. I know she's a student and I'm kind of her gini pig but at this point I have no choice. I stopped all home remedy treatments and I'm following her instructions. Tomorrow is one week since I started following her instructions. I have had one good night of sleep, I've hardly eaten anything in a week, The bug activity has gotten worse, and I'm severely suffering. Not to mention I have ten thousand dollars' worth of bracelet supplies sitting in a room collecting dust, while my pour 70 year old mother is trying to pay this debt off. My husband and I have maxed out our credit cards on neem oil, clove oil, plastic bags, plastic gloves, sulphur products, distilled water, vinegar, and anything else you can think of. We are barely making ends meet and we are afraid of losing our house and still looking and hoping for a cure. I don't know if this is going to work, I thought about killing myself but my faith in God is strong and that has kept me from taking action. I pray to the good Lord to take pity on me and grant me his mercies and compassions and heal me. I pray that he guides this young student to find a solution to my problem. Even as I write this email the bugs are attacking me. It has taken me all day to write this email because I'm fighting with the bugs. I have to stop every other word to get them out of my nose, ears, and swot them off my head. By the way I collected some bugs in a bottle and the young student looked at them with a microscope and confirmed that I'm not crazy and these are scabies. Please everyone forgive me for this very long email and pray for me. I don't know when I'll be back or even if I will ever be cured but I wanted everyone to know why I'm leaving my favourite mailing lists, and I will miss you all, I will miss reading your solutions to all problems related to the mac, PC, iPhone, etc. I will miss the delicious recipes amongst other things. I hope that if one day I am cured you will all accept me back and then I will let you know how I got cured if you're interested. Again my apologies to the list owners and moderators for the off topic post and long email. May all of you be well and most importantly healthy. Without health nothing is of importance. Tell your friends and families how much you love them because you never know what could happen to you. The worst horror movie or nightmare you have ever seen could come true like my case. Thanks to those who took the time to read such a long email. By the way one of the hardest things is not being able to hug your loved ones. My husband has cried like a child because he can't hug or kiss me. If these bugs don't kill me, and the emotional and physical pain doesn't kill me I will emerge stronger and with heck of a tale to tell those who want to listen. Be well all from an isolated, suffering, but hopeful human being somewhere in Toronto. Sincerely Zoe For answers to frequently asked questions about this list visit: http://www.jaws-users.com/help/ For answers to frequently asked questions about this list visit: http://www.jaws-users.com/help/ David Ferrin You don't have to be crazy to run a list like this, but it does help. For answers to frequently asked questions about this list visit: http://www.jaws-users.com/help/ For answers to frequently asked questions about this list visit: http://www.jaws-users.com/help/ For answers to frequently asked questions about this list visit: http://www.jaws-users.com/help/