[uucdigest]         Monday, October 13 2003         Volume 03 : Number 6810



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In this BMW UUC Digest:

       Re: [uuc] Gel Batteries
       [uuc] E36 Headlight Comparison
       RE: [uuc] INTERIOR RECONDITIONING IN LOS ANGELES
       Re: [uuc] Gel Batteries
       Re: [uuc] Gel Batteries
       [uuc] FS: 1998 M3 Convertible - $26000!
       RE: [uuc] No eject from CD changer. Magazine now out 
       [uuc] <FS> E30 M3 radiator
       RE: [uuc] Re:  Sad BMW-related Story
       [uuc] =?iso-8859-1?Q?=22Seinfeld's_Dumb_Porsche-Haus=22_-_NY_Observer_article?=

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 15:39:12 -0400
From: "Eurowerks" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: Re: [uuc] Gel Batteries

Are you thinking of using an OPTIMA gel cell?  If so, I don't think there is
any weight savings at all over a standard battery.  I am pretty sure that
the OPTIMA may even be a little heavier.  I use these in my off-road
applications as well as marine use.
Otherwise, if weight is not a factor in the equation, the gel cell's work
great in all applications, just nearly twice as much $$$!
I always use the really good ones though (blue top), and don't know about
the red or yellow tops.

Kirk A. Gilchrist
EURO-WERKS / Mercedes-Benz, BMW, Volvo Service and Repair
8 South Highland St. / Winchester, KY 40391 / 859-745-0125
[EMAIL PROTECTED] / 888-522-0271 toll free

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 12:39:30 -0700
From: Roger Baker <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: [uuc] E36 Headlight Comparison

Any people nearby the Los Angeles area who would be interested in 
getting together for a little headlight comparo? I would like to get at 
least 1 car with each of the various E36 headlights (ZKW, Bosch, InPro, 
Hella, factory US) both with halogen bulbs and HID upgrades installed. 
If anyone is interested in participating, drop me an email.
- --
Roger

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 12:59:52 -0700
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Subject: RE: [uuc] INTERIOR RECONDITIONING IN LOS ANGELES

Chris,

>From the appearance of the stitching I'd say he used either a colorant such
as Leatherique or possibly just an laquer job. If the latter it won't last
long.
The repair of the original crazing is well done.

- -Kevin

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 15:05:15 -0500
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Subject: Re: [uuc] Gel Batteries

Eurowerks <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
> Are you thinking of using an OPTIMA gel cell?  If so, I don't think 
> there is any weight savings at all over a standard battery.  I am 
> pretty sure that the OPTIMA may even be a little heavier. 

Optima (orange tops in my case) are lighter than OE Douglas battery. 
Granted, Optima is not feather light, but it's not the OE boat anchor 
either.

> I use these in my off-road applications as well as marine use.
> Otherwise, if weight is not a factor in the equation, the gel cell's 
> work great in all applications, just nearly twice as much $$$!

FWIW, I paid ~$120 for the Optimas while OE Douglas and the like can 
sometimes be found for $90-100 from battery resellers. A local dealer once 
quoted me $225 for an OEM Douglas + 1 hour of labor to install it. 'nuff 
said.

> I always use the really good ones though (blue top), and don't know about
> the red or yellow tops.

Ahhh, that may explain the discrepancy.
Sound like the blue tops are way heavier than yellow tops!

alex f

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 16:43:39 -0400 (GMT-04:00)
From: Brian Daley <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: Re: [uuc] Gel Batteries

Kirk,
It's kind of a nit pick, but Optimas aren't gel cells, they're AGM (Absorbed Glass 
Mat).  Regarding blue being "really good" as far as I'm aware the blue tops are no 
different from the red/yellow tops except for the extra set of threaded terminals.  
Red tops are starter batteries, yellows are deep cycle, and the blues are marine, 
available in both starter and deep cycle versions.  The deep cycle have a slightly 
different chemical composition to handle repeated discharge/recharge cycles.  Optima 
makes several different group size batteries.  Within a group size there isn't much 
difference in weight.  The group 34 red top is 37.9 lb, the group 34 blue top is 38.4 
lb, and the group 34 blue top deep cycle is 43.5 lb.  The specs page for the group 34 
yellows is hosed, but I'd guess 43 lb same .5 lb difference as between the red and 
blue starter batteries.
As far as price the red tops are about the same as the stock E36 battery from the 
dealer ~$120.  

Brian
'94 325ic with new stock battery
'94 Cobra with Optima red top

- -----Original Message-----
From: Eurowerks <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Oct 13, 2003 3:39 PM
To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Subject: Re: [uuc] Gel Batteries

Are you thinking of using an OPTIMA gel cell?  If so, I don't think there is
any weight savings at all over a standard battery.  I am pretty sure that
the OPTIMA may even be a little heavier.  I use these in my off-road
applications as well as marine use.
Otherwise, if weight is not a factor in the equation, the gel cell's work
great in all applications, just nearly twice as much $$$!
I always use the really good ones though (blue top), and don't know about
the red or yellow tops.

Kirk A. Gilchrist
EURO-WERKS / Mercedes-Benz, BMW, Volvo Service and Repair
8 South Highland St. / Winchester, KY 40391 / 859-745-0125
[EMAIL PROTECTED] / 888-522-0271 toll free

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 13:12:20 -0700
From: "Ahmad S. Hamzawi" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: [uuc] FS: 1998 M3 Convertible - $26000!

Beautiful 1998 BMW M3 Convertible for sale. Join the many that have enjoyed
the BMW M-series, which has won numerous awards and accolades throughout the
years!

http://hamzawi.homeip.net/pics/m3/m3.JPG

Here are the details:

o Low 50K miles, mostly freeway
o 5 speed, black on black
o 8 Speaker Premium Harmon Kardon Stereo System with BMW 6 CD changer
o BMW M3 5 spoke M-Contour rims
o BMW Keyless entry with alarm and 2 remotes
o Factory Perma-Plate paint protector (bought when new)
o All BMW Factory options which include - Power Convertible
Top/Seats/Windows, Dual heated power seats, cruise control, On-Board
computer (OBC), Rear Defroster, Power Locks, Dual Zone Climate Control Air
Conditioning, Power Mirrors,
o Dynamic Stability Control 
o Rollover package 
o Dual front and side airbags 
o New front and rear Michelin tires
o ITG Performance (reusable) air filter
o Recently replaced rear convertible window
o Dealer serviced, all records
o Always hand washed and waxed
o Jim Conforti Performance Chip (average 22 miles per gallon city and 26
freeway) 
o Smogged on 5/18, and paid registration which is good for 1 yr!

Price TO SELL below market at $26000

You can call me at 408 592 6932

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 21:49:53 -0400
From: "Jerome & Chinthika Welte" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: RE: [uuc] No eject from CD changer. Magazine now out 

Thanks for everyone's advice, especially John Hovell. With his advice I was
able to slide a thin piece of cardboard under the magazine that tripped a
release lever and out popped the magazine. Looks like a damper on the
changer is causing the problem.

Regards,
Jerome

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 20:01:26 -0700 (PDT)
From: Carlos Lopez <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: [uuc] <FS> E30 M3 radiator

I installed a new radiator along with a new water pump and all new
hoses.  My old radiator was working fine, I took a closer look and it
looks like it's in really good condition.  I don't have much storage
space so it's gotta go.  $100 + shipping from the Detroit area.

BTW my car has the aux fan switch on the thermostat housing and
therefore the radiator for sale has blanks on the bottom left corner
(no provisions for coolant temp sensors).

Carlos 
Motor City Chapter
91 M3
88 iS

__________________________________
Do you Yahoo!?
The New Yahoo! Shopping - with improved product search
http://shopping.yahoo.com

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 23:06:14 -0400
From: "Robinson, Lee" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: RE: [uuc] Re:  Sad BMW-related Story

> the money.  Even if I had the time and the money, I
> would still be risking breaking something and being 5
> hours away from school.

Aww, c'mon.  I drove an E30M3 with a broken wheel bearing 8 hours back from
Sebring to Atlanta (& proceeded to put a few hundred miles on afterwards) in
the middle of the night.  Dunna worry, she'll hold together.

You could always rent a car.  A few weeks ago when I did the Panoz skool at
Road A, there was a guy there in a brand new XJ8--a Hertz rental.  Used to
be that Alamo rented S2000's, but I think they've stopped, maybe even for
this reason.  I can see the return guy now, "damn, this is the 4th weekend
in a row this thing has come back with bald tires & a melted clutch."

> 
> I agree that my driving skills leave a little (or a
> lot, maybe?) to be desired, but being the 352nd person
> to bring this to my attention will not resolve the
> situation.

It's alright Brad, not everybody's priorities are the same.  A lot of guys
would rather be watching football all weekend then being at the track, &
that's ok.  Most people will go their entire life without any track time.

FWIW, I think you'd learn about 100% more at a proper car control course
than a single DE.  Being out of control is where you learn & that's
generally discouraged at DE's, especially for beginners.

> 
> Brad Couvillon <-- speaking somewhat tongue-in-cheek

Lee
88 M3->passed said 290hp XJ8 pretty easily--not bad considering how Road A
rewards sheer hp

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 13 Oct 2003 23:44:47 -0400
From: "Dennis Liu" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: [uuc] 
=?iso-8859-1?Q?=22Seinfeld's_Dumb_Porsche-Haus=22_-_NY_Observer_article?=

Enjoy.  The rantings of a liberal Manhattanite....

vty,

- --Dennis
_____________


http://www.observer.com/pages/frontpage3.asp

Seinfeld�s Dumb Porsche-Haus
by Ron Rosenbaum


Jerry�s Garage. Jerry�s Porsche-haus. I didn�t believe it until I saw it
with my own eyes. I�d read about it here in The Observer a year or so ago
and immediately went into a state of denial. No. Jerry Seinfeld can�t be
just handing me material like this. It must be a joke. Jerry Seinfeld is a
"comedian," isn�t he? I mean, that�s how he�s identified in the media. Just
because I don�t find him funny; just because I think he may be the worst
stand-up comedian in recorded history, one who�s generated a devil-spawn of
unfunny "observational" comedians who make interminable "cutting-edge" jokes
about, you know, Starbucks calling its smallest size "tall"�stuff like that.
(Roll over, Sam Kinison!) But hey, some people find the guy funny. Live and
let live. So the whole Porsche-haus thing could have been Jerry�s attempt at
a joke.

And then I saw it. After years in the planning, construction is going
forward, even though (we�ll get to this later) the city�s Department of
Buildings says the applications have not been fully approved. But I�ve been
there. I�ve been to the site! It�s almost like being able to say I was there
when they put the capstone on the Great Pyramid of Cheops. I was there when
they were building Jerry�s Garage, Jerry�s Porsche-haus, the entire building
he�s constructing on an Upper West Side street to house a very special few
of Jerry�s Very Special Collection of Porsches, the one he�s building three
blocks away from his $4.35 million duplex in the Beresford, so he could be
close enough to say nighty-night and beddy-bye to his beloved German sports
cars whenever he wants to.

I was there when it was close to completion. It�s just too good to be true.
Nearly a million and a half dollars to provide housing for homeless �
Porsches! Poor Jerry. I�m sure he�s very deep. But it suggets that he is
just as superficial and self-absorbed as the character he played on his
sitcom. More so! Even "Jerry" would have ridiculed Jerry for this tribute to
childish grandiosity, this monumental folly: Porsche-haus. The Great Pyramid
of Dumbness.

Before we go any further, I want to say I�ve demonstrated great forbearance
when it comes to Jerry recently. It�s true I spent most of the late 90�s
ridiculing the ineffable smugness of his sitcom persona in these pages. (It�
s not the sitcom so much as "Jerry" I can�t stand.) It�s true I founded a
half-serious "Can�t Stand Seinfeld Society" in these pages, and hundreds of
people clipped out the handy membership coupon and sent it in. It�s true
that I can never really respect anyone who explains to me that Jerry�s humor
is really "about nothing." That�s like sooo profound and all, no question,
but it�s almost too heavy an insight for me to handle.

But, really, I�ve tried to be good. I�ve tried to lay off Jerry lately.
After all, he hasn�t bothered us recently, unless you count that amazingly
hostile and self-aggrandizing Seinfeld "film" called Comedian (I�ll get to
that incredibly self-revealing fiasco in a moment).

After all, Seinfeld the show has been off the air for several years, and it�
s possible, if you�re careful, to avoid the reruns. Jerry�s been spending
his time lavishing huge sums on the extremely important task of renovating
his expensive apartment. I bet he even worked with the decorator, a real
hands-on deal for this important task. Look, it�s kept him out of our face.

So it�s been years now since I�ve had occasion to make fun of the Prince of
Massapequa. But then I saw it: Porsche-haus, as I�m sure it will come to be
called. And I discovered the Mystery of the Missing 13 Porsches�the Little
Kittens Who Lost Their Mittens of the German-sports-car-collector world.

I�d been having lunch with a friend of mine at Barney Greengrass on
Amsterdam and 86th, and he told me about a friend of his who takes classes
at the yoga studio on West 83rd Street next-door to Porsche-haus. And how
the serenity and composure of the classes had been disrupted recently by the
resumption of the construction racket at Porsche-haus.

It was then that it all came back to me: the story�first reported in The
Observer by Tom McGeveran in March 2002�that, after having spent a fortune
at the Beresford with his money-wasting vanity renovations that gutted his
apartment at one of New York�s most revered residential buildings, Jerry was
now spending close to one and a half million dollars to tear down a small
structure on West 83rd Street and erect an entire building that would be
devoted to housing 20 of his Very Very Special German sports cars:
Porsche-haus!

But not just any garage. A Very Very Special Garage, a Kozy Clubhouse (or
Klub-haus) for Jerry to commune with his Porsches. A garage with a dramatic
steel-and-glass staircase and a cozy little "kitchenette" where Jer can kick
back and have milk and cookies while gazing over his three floors of
Porsches, deciding which one he will grace with his butt next.

Of course, there were the usual complications with getting building permits,
and neighbors having their lives disrupted with noise and sidewalk
obstruction. But Jerry very considerately had seismograph wires drilled into
neighboring buildings in order to keep track of the vibrations the
Porsche-haus construction caused. He paid the yoga studio when it had to
close down during the construction because the ground was shaking beneath
the downward-facing dogs. That was a year and a half ago.

So here�s Part I of the mystery: The Observer story, and follow-ups in other
papers, reported that construction was supposed to be completed in June
2002. What happened? Couldn�t Jerry get just the right kind of Sub-Zero
fridge up to the kitchenette?

I reached spokesperson Ilyse Fink at the city�s Department of Buildings, who
told me a check of the permit situation showed that the plan applications
had been turned down twice since January 2000, most recently in October
2002. It�s possible that zoning limitations on garage-building below 96th
Street are involved. Of course, there is the city�s housing shortage. Even
though the site is narrow�only 16 feet across�the importance to the city of
giving space up to a garage for one wealthy individual is debatable, if you
ask me. Some might see it as insensitive to the tens of thousands of people
desperate for decent housing in the city. Maybe though, if you take Jerry�s
point of view, it�s much ado "about nothing."

Anyway, when my friend and I got to the site, workers were working away,
hammers were banging, hand trucks of cement were going in, the frontage was
boarded up with wood, and the sidewalk was heavily trafficked with workers.
The Department of Buildings spokesperson said that it often happens that
construction projects go forward without their final permits, in the hope or
assumption that they will eventually be granted. This is called "building at
risk"�it�s not illegal, it�s just that if the permits are not ultimately
granted, the builder can be prohibited from using it for its intended
purpose. Gee, I sure hope that Jerry doesn�t have to put the Porsches out on
the street if the final permits don�t come through! The city would then lose
what will soon come to be a fabulous tourist attraction on the order of the
old Times Square Ripley�s Believe it or Not freak show. One that asks the
single question: Is Jerry aware of how incredibly dumb this makes him look?
Or is it his statement? Is it his in-your-face way of proclaiming: "Say it
loud: I�m dumb and I�m proud!" After all, there are monuments to all sorts
of achievers in America, but do Really Superficial Rich People have a place
to call their own? Soon they will.

But the visit to the Porsche-haus construction site raised another mystery:
let�s call it The Clue of the Thirteen Porsches. In the original stories
about Porsche-haus, its capacity was always referred to as 20: room for 20
Porsches to nest together and long for Papa Jerry�s visits. The Speedster
and the Boxster and the Carrera get lonely. Twenty Porsches! In an Upper
West Side neighborhood. So The Observer reported, and in a subsequent
conversation with the Observer reporter, a Seinfeld spokesperson didn�t
dispute any of the facts.

By the way, do you think he has names for his Porsches? Does he call the
Boxster "Gunther," and the blue Speedster "Hermann"? Inquiring minds want to
know. And the guy who designed the brand, Ferdinand Porsche�did Jerry name
one after him, for his great contribution to the German automotive industry
in the 30�s and 40�s, among other things?

But I digress. Here�s where the mystery enters in. I asked one of the
workmen at the site (on West 83rd Street, between Amsterdam and Columbus)
just how many cars the great edifice was designed to hold, and he said
seven! Seven! I thought it was supposed to be 20. The buildings department
said the only request they have that specifies a number of vehicles calls
for "accessory parking" for four cars with a 240-square-foot addition. So
that could add up to seven. I guess it�s just an oversight that seven cars
aren�t mentioned in the permit application. (An e-mail to the office of Mr.
Seinfeld�s P.R. rep, sent on the Friday before The Observer�s publication
date, asking for clarification, has so far gone unanswered.) Sure, it�s
unofficial, the workman�s estimate of seven cars; maybe he was misinformed,
but suddenly it made me think of a terrible scenario.

Maybe because of negotiations with some zoning authority, Jerry had to
downsize the original grand 20-car plan for Porsche-haus! Which would have
meant Jerry having to choose. Which of the 20 Porsches would get to stay
close to their Porsche-meister? And which would be banished
to�horrors�commercial garages, where they�d be subject to gawking and
ridicule by Other Cars and Jerry wouldn�t be able to say good night to them
and make it all better?

How would he break the news to Gunther or the particularly sensitive
Hermann? Would it be a one-on-one, or would he make it a Paradise Hotel kind
of thing, where he�d make the cars compete in displays of affection for him
to avoid being kicked off the island?

Wouldn�t that give Gunther the crafty Boxster an unfair advantage? I hear he
�s been known to spread slanders about Hermann behind his back!

I feel somehow we need to do something for the Little Lost Porsches. The
lonely 13 German machines. Homeless sports cars need love and companionship,
too, right? Maybe Jerry could talk some of his neighbors at the Beresford
into moving out to make room for Hermann and Gunther�or at least into
letting them stay in the guest bedrooms. I�m sure with a few knocked-out
walls, ramps (and kitchenettes), the neighbors would find it in their hearts
to take them in.

Am I being mean to Jerry? I won�t say, in my defense, look how mean he�s
being to Hermann and Gunther. No, I will cite in my defense the fact that
Jerry consented to appear in one of the most petty, mean-spirited
documentaries I�ve ever seen. The one called, misleadingly, Comedian. I
never saw it when it came out, never rented it until my visit to
Porsche-haus. And I have to admit I found it shocking.

It�s ostensibly about Jerry going through what we�re constantly being told
is the super arduous, incredibly courageous preparation for what he�s
interminably telling us is the real deal in comedy: stand-up. Oh, what a
religion he makes of stand-up, particularly�or maybe because�he�s such a
pathetic practitioner. The premise of the documentary is to follow Jerry
after he�s taken the bold and courageous decision to "retire" his old
stand-up stuff (someone alert the Swedish Academy!) and develop "all-new"
material.

But we only get snatches of the "all-new" material, which is shocking in
itself. Not shocking because it�s outrageous or funny. Shocking because if
you�ve seen any of Jerry�s stand-up before, you would not think it remotely
possible that he could find anything more pallid, insipid and pathetic to
attempt to extort laughs from. But he�s done it! He�s out done himself:
lip-liner! He makes fun of women who wear lip-liner. ("We know where the
lips are." Funny!) Other subjects he tells us he�s going to make jokes
about: "Coffee, Starbucks[!], lips, men�s attention, construction sites[!],
beauty contests, equator, DNA, blind men, nose hair." Cutting-edge!

But the really offensive thing about the movie is that it makes a cruel
spectacle of a poor young comedian named Orny Adams. A guy we�re meant to
see as the young Jerry or something, when Jerry was on the make, before
Jerry developed his legendary successful sitcom savoir-faire, I guess. But
it�s really a portrayal that seems to express Jerry�s deep hostility to the
entire stand-up comic business that he�s transcended.

In the film, Orny seems to be about on the same superficial level as Jerry
is, but that could be the editing. Still, one senses that Orny has signed on
to the film because he thinks that it�s his big break, that it will make him
a star. (Anybody hear of him since?) Instead, he�s humiliated by the
filmmakers, who show him listening to one comic say of the manager Orny and
Jerry share, "First he represented Jerry Seinfeld, now he�s representing
Orny Adams. What�s next, the parrot from Baretta?" That�s funny. But it�s
also really cruel, and the documentary zooms in on poor Orny�s face as he
listens to the joke ridiculing him. Did Jerry sanction this cruelty? Jerry
wouldn�t do that to Gunther or Hermann, would he?

Really, the way Orny is treated in Jerry�s film, it makes you fear for the
future of Gunther and Hermann if they ever stall. Porsche-haus has a harsh
meister. I�m open to suggestions from readers about what we should do to
console and house the 13 little kittens who lost their mittens�I mean the 13
little Porsches who lost their places in the meister�s haus. Won�t someone
volunteer to take them in and tuck them in at night?

back to top
This column ran on page 1 in the 10/13/2003 edition of The New York
Observer.

------------------------------

End of [uucdigest] V3 #6810
***************************

|
| In memory of Michel Potheau - friend, enthusiast, founder of the BMW CCA.
|________________________________________
| Please visit these UUC-approved BMW parts vendors/service providers:
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| Autoscope-Motorsports - http://www.autoscope-motorsports.com
|
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|      http://www.koalamotorsport.com
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|
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| 207 Elm Street, Amesbury, MA 01950
| 978-388-7769 / fax 978-388-4202
| http://www.turnermotorsport.com
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