----- Original Message ----- From: "Julia Thompson" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To: "Killer Bs Discussion" <[email protected]> Sent: Thursday, April 28, 2005 11:25 PM Subject: Co-dependency
> This article was pointed out to me by a friend: > > http://www.stickyminds.com/sitewide.asp?ObjectId=2275&Function=DETAILBROWSE&ObjectType=COL > http://tinyurl.com/98hsz > > There are four definitions listed for codependency: > > * “An emotional, psychological, and behavioral condition that > develops as a result of an individual’s prolonged exposure to, and > practice of, a set of oppressive rules” (Robert Subby); > > * “A set of maladaptive, compulsive behaviors learned by family > members to survive in a family experiencing great emotional pain” (The > Johnson Institute); > > * “A stressful learned behavior associated with an unhealthy focus > on the needs of others and/or attempting to take responsibility for the > behavior of others” (Brian DesRoches); > > * “We begin tolerating abnormal, unhealthy, and inappropriate > behaviors. Then we go one step further, we convince ourselves these > behaviors are normal” (Melody Beattie). > > Those more in the know than I, how good are these definitions? > > (The article was about software testing, BTW, and testers responding to > their work environment with codependent behavior. I'd be interested in > anything anyone has to say about *that* aspect of the article.) > These statements are not false, but Teri says that the essential definition of co-dependency is an enabling behavior. With drug addiction, co-dependants would deny the effects of the addition and cover for the addict. With spousal abuse, the abused person would blame themselves for the abuse, citing something they did wrong to cause the abuse. Dan M. _______________________________________________ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l
