I think you are probably right about this being a minority numbers thing.  My 
observation has been that we as callers and administrators tent to make a 
bigger deal out of things than the general dance community.

Case in point..

We recently had a very capable caller who just had a really bad night.  Other 
callers were puzzled and it became a topic among local callers including the 
one involved.  Everyone wondered how this could happen.  It even got to the 
point the caller sent an email to the community apologizing for the problems.

The reaction from the community?  They had no idea what he was talking about.  
They had a great time and don't remember any of the problems.

I try to look at these issues from the point of view of the new/first time 
dancer.  I doubt any of them are confused or offended by the use of 'ladies' or 
'gents'.  However, they are confused by couples dancing reversed roles and 
aggressive dancers trying to force them into flourishes they don't understand.

If this discussion were only for dance weekend type environments - it would 
have a lot more validity.  For weekly dances series events - let's keep it 
simple, have a great time, enjoy the music and other dancers and, above all 
make it a positive experience for all levels of dancers.  Most of them would be 
surprised we were even having this discussion.

Mac McKeever  




________________________________
 From: Maia McCormick <[email protected]>
To: Caller's discussion list <[email protected]> 
Sent: Friday, January 4, 2013 4:47 PM
Subject: Re: [Callers] When Did Gender Role Terms Become a "Problem"
 
Perhaps this very discussion/movement is a sign that there is a need for
change. While I respect the value of the traditional terms, and how much
easier they make things for everyone, I certainly understand how they can
be constraining and frustrating for those of us who like a) switching roles
and/or b) switching gender/gender presentation.

Perhaps this is a minority forcing their views on others. But I see it as
small potatoes compared to said majority constantly forcing their views on
us. Sometimes it's a pain to be gender- or role-noncomformist in this
society. The feeling of being a young woman at a dance, following the lead
of a man who dances far too close for comfort, or being a man who dances
follow and is constantly told that he's in the wrong place, or partnering
with your same sex friend only to be told "there are two men dancing
together over there, why don't you just split up and dance with each
other!" as if no one would want a same-sex dance couple if there were any
other option available, or being a transperson who is intrusively asked
their sex when they ask someone to dance. And yes, I've made this point
hyperbolically, but my point is: if a minority seems to be "forcing" its
views on a majority, it is often just push-back for 99x that
forcing-of-views from the past, that doesn't seem like view-forcing
precisely *because* it comes from a majority. But in a certain sense, the
use of gendered contra terms is just that, we've just ceased to notice it
as such.

A last thought: everything is social engineering, because social forces are
at work in everything.

On Thu, Jan 3, 2013 at 11:29 AM, <[email protected]> wrote:

> Who the heck are we to force our views
> on others? Things will change if there is a reason for them to change.
> Dancing is PLAY, not a means for social engineering.
>
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