A friend of mine with autistic kids shared something with me that she learned from her kids' therapist: some people have a hard time taking verbal direction for physical activity and do better by seeing a demonstration. So sometimes when I have a dancer on the floor who seems really confused, I think about this idea. Your mileage may vary. Anyway. Good luck. Meg in Chicago On Mon, Mar 6, 2017 at 4:58 PM Marie-Michèle Fournier via Callers < callers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote:
> Thanks April and everyone else, this is giving me a lot of ideas to think > about. > To answer your question, he does not seem to understand the "damage" he's > sometimes leaving in his wake, he might not realize the importance of being > on time to help the other dancers. If anyone has a gentle way to suggest to > let him understand that it would be appreciated. But once we do that, I > like the suggestion to include him in discussions about how to help and > would like to do it. > > Unfortunately, this is a fairly small community with lots of new dancers > every time, so I don't think we have 12 experienced female dancers, let > alone 12 willing to dance with him and I'm not sure he's willing to dance > with other men. I might not be the only one who is struggling to have > empathy because I do not want to dance with him twice (he also smells > really bad and doesn't always control the strength with which he grips my > hand, although that might be getting better). Do you think it's better to > concentrate our efforts at the beginning of the evening so new dancers can > get used to contra, or at the end of the evening when dances are usually a > little more complicated? > > Also, trying to articulate the problem a little better: he can swing > reasonably, and I think circles and stars are ok if the music is not too > fast. But I think that sometimes he does the wrong thing with confidence > which throws people off if he doesn't have a firm, experienced partner to > hold him back. > > Thanks all, I already have lots of material to think about, but keep it > coming! > Marie > ContraMontreal > > On Mon, Mar 6, 2017 at 5:30 PM, April Blum via Callers < > callers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > > You want to avoid letting him pair up with a new dancer, so you might > indeed want to have a confidential chat with the regular ladies who are > also good leads, and see if they are willing to take turns dancing with him. > Some techniques for his partners: Walk the swing and stop early to face > in. Turn 1.5 allemandes into half allemandes or pull bys. Turn free moves > into "with hands" moves where possible. Ask your caller to suggest that > everyone try a hey with hands if the timing is tight. Or turn a hey for > four into a hey for three, with you and he acting as a unit. That works for > half heys as well. Just cross the set together, dodging the other two > dancers. If he's hopelessly behind each time through, consider skipping B2 > and set up for the next repetition. Maybe concentrate on getting him > comfortable with the first part of the sequence. > Is he aware of his "rock in the stream of the dance" status? The answer to > this might affect how much adaptation he will accept. > Do keep in mind that it takes a certain amount of courage to try something > new and challenging, particularly as an individual rather than a couple. > And one or more of the organizers should chat with him at the break. It > would be useful to find out if he has a physical challenge. On Mar 6, 2017 > 3:13 PM, Marie-Michèle Fournier via Callers < > callers@lists.sharedweight.net> wrote: > > > > Hi everyone, > > Lately a new dancer has started coming to our dance and he is bad > enough that he will often make the set break if the dance is moderately > challenging. He seems to have some kind of impairment and walks very > stiffly which means he will often not be on time for a figure and also > often does not remember what is coming next. > > We want to be inclusive but at the same time his presence negatively > impacts other dancers in his set and while some of the experienced dancers > will take one for the team and dance with him, it is an unpleasant > experience to be his partner. Unfortunately, we always have many new > dancers and having one couple not be where they should be can really throw > them off in some dances so I feel like I have to push and pull him around > to be on time, despite the fact that it's a little rude. > > A recent caller to our dance called him a "speed bump" which was > quite accurate. I'm sure other dances have had experience with similar > troubles, does anyone have advice on how to deal with this so that other > dancers still have a good time yet we are nice to this problematic dancer? > > Thank you > > Marie > > ContraMontreal > _______________________________________________ > Callers mailing list > Callers@lists.sharedweight.net > http://lists.sharedweight.net/listinfo.cgi/callers-sharedweight.net > > > _______________________________________________ > Callers mailing list > Callers@lists.sharedweight.net > http://lists.sharedweight.net/listinfo.cgi/callers-sharedweight.net >