I feel your pain .. I went through something very similar just this last
week .. how ironic ;)
Todd
-----
*fizzle* *crackle* *put put* *fzzzzzzzzzblat* Uh oh!
----- Original Message -----
From: "Vinny DiDonato (si.rr)" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: "CF-Community" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Thursday, May 24, 2001 9:38 PM
Subject: RE: ****8**88***DINTY H"S BUFFIE SHOW!!1!!!***8***888***
> Ok, I gotta come out of lurk mode for this "Dinty H Buffie Show"...
>
> First off, it was hysterical. I've never seen an episode of Buffy before,
> but I figured it was similar to this... well, this masterpiece. :)
>
> Second, I have NEVER had a worse headache than I've had after reading
this.
> Nope, this headache beats the one I had when our CSU/DSU was fried, the
> Spectra servers went down, and our SQL Server machine's power supply died.
> (All in a matter of hours)
>
> <cf_advil>
> -Vinny in NYC
> </cf_advil>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Todd Ashworth [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]]
> Sent: Thursday, May 24, 2001 5:29 PM
> To: CF-Community
> Subject: ****8**88***DINTY H"S BUFFIE SHOW!!1!!!***8***888***
>
>
> With all this talk about buffy, I couldn't resist heh.
>
> This is a story by everyone's favorite chat pal, Little Dinty H. It's a
> little dated, but still amusing. This is PG-13 btw ;)
>
> Oh .. and an extra muffin for anyone who gets the Vampire Hunter H
reference
> :)
>
>
> DINTY H"S BUFFIE SHOW
>
> J. GEILS; EVERY GENERASHUN THEIR IS A CHOSEN WON TO LET A VAMPIER
> STICK HIS HOO HOO DILLY IN HER CHACHA, THE SLAYER.
>
> WOLF; AAOOOOOOOOOO!111!!
>
> CUT TO THE LIBRARIE...
>
> WILLO; WEL IT SHUR IS A NICE DAY HEAR IN SUNNYDAIL!11!
>
> ZANDER; YES AND IT IS A MIRAKEL THAT A VAMPIER HAS NOT KILLED US BECUZ
> BUFFIE IS NOT DOING HER JOB!!11!!
>
> BUFFIE; HEY THAT"S NOT FARE!!11!! I"M VERY UPSET ABOUT MY
> BOYFREND!!11!!!
>
> J. GEILS; WEL I"M VERY UPSET ABOUT MY GIRLFREND BUT YOU WOOD"NT NO
> ANYTHING ABOUT THAT WOOD YOU BUFFY??//??
>
> BUFFIE; STOP BEING SUCH MEAN WONS TO ME!!11!!! I HAVE TO GO TO
> CLASS!!11!!
>
> WILLO; YAH BUFFIE LET"S GO TO CLASS AND FORGET ABOWT THESE MEAN
> WONS!!11!!!
>
> CUT TO THE CLASS...
>
> CORDEELIA; HEY YOU GUYS YOU WERE ALMOST LAET!!11!!
>
> WILLO; YAH SORRIE ABOUT THAT.
>
> TEECHER; EVERYWON PLEESE WELCOME OUR NEW STOODENT LITTEL DINTY H!!11!!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; HELO LADIES YOU ARE ALL CUTE WONS!!1!!
>
> ALL GIRLS; I WANT TO BE YOU"RE GIRLFREND!!111!!
>
> BUFFIE; HE WILL BE MINE!!11!! O YES HE WILL BE MINE!!11!! HEY DINTY H
> DO YOU WANT TO HAVE A DATE WITH ME???//??
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; WELL OK!!11!! WE CAN GO TO THE MOVIES AND SEE JON
> CLOD VAN DAMB!!11!!
>
> BUFFIE; OK I LIEK THAT IDEA!!111!!!
>
> CUT TO OUTSIED THE MOVIE THEETER...
>
> BUFFIE; THAT MOVIE WAS A GOOD WON!!11!! I CAN DO KARATIE TRICKS LIEK
> THAT TOO!!1!!!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; YAH WEL I CAN TOO!!1!!
>
> BUFFIE; WOW YOU ARE A COOL WON!!1!! OK LET"S WALK HOME THRU THE
> GRAVYARD!11!! OH NO HEAR COMES SOME MEAN WON VAMPIERS AND MY
> BOYFREND!!!11!! WHAT WILL I DO I DO"NT WANT TO HURT HIM!!!1!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; THAT OK WATCH ME GO!!11!!
>
> BUFFIE; WOW THOSE ARE NEET KARATIE FLIPS AND KICKS IN THE AIR YOU ARE
> DOING!!1!! YOU ARE REELY KILLING THOSE VAMPIERS!!1!!
>
> ANKEL; O CARP IT"S DINTY H!!!!1!!! YOWZA YOWZA I"M OUTTA HEAR!!!111!
>
> BUFFIE; WOW DINTY THAT WAS GRATE!!1!! DO YOU WANT TO COME TO MY HOUSE
> AND HAEV RELASHUNS?//??
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; THANK YOU NO I HAEV MORALS YOU SLUTTY GIRL!11!!
> ONESTLIE YOU ARE WORSE THAN THE SLUTTY NEW YORK GIRL ON DAWSIN"S
> CREEK!11! BESIEDS I DO"NT WANT ANKEL"S VAMPIER STD!!1!!!
>
> CUT TO THE LIBARIE...
>
> CORDEELIA; WEL BUFFIE HOW WAS YOUR DATE WITH DINTY?//??
>
> BUFFIE; IT WAS OK I GESS...HE HAS GOOD KARATIE TRICKS BUT HE WOOD"NT
> PUT OUT!!1!!!
>
> J. GEILS; WHAT A MINIT BUFFIE!!11!! DID YOU SAY DINTY???/?? DINTY
> H??//? DO"NT YOU NO HOO HE IS??//??
>
> WILLO; LOOK SOMEWON IS DOING A NIFTY FLIP THRU THE LIBRARIE
> WINDOW!!11!!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; YES I MUST ADMIT IT"S ME VAMPIER HUNTER H!11!!! BUT
> MY FRIENDS CALL ME DINTY!!1!!
>
> J. GEILS; ACORDING TO MY WASHER BOOKS DINTY IS HALF VAMPIER BECUZ HIS
> MOTHER WAS A SLAYER WHO LET A VAMPIER PUT HIS HOO HOO DILLY IN HER
> CHACHA.
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; YES IT"S TRUE THATS WHY I HAET ALL MEAN WON
> VAMPIERS EXCEPT FOR ELVIRA HOW ABOUT THOSE THINGIES??//??? HUBBA
> HUBBA!!1!!!
>
> CORDEELIA; THIS DINTY SHUR IS A CUTE WON AND HE SEEMS TO BE BETER THAN
> BUFFIE!!1!!
>
> BUFFIE; SHUT UP I JUST WANT MY BOYFREND!!11!!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; WELL TOO BAD BECUZ I"M GOING TO STAKE HIM BUT NOT
> THE WAY HE STAKED YOU IF YOU NO WAHT I MEEN!!1!! NUG NUDG WINK
> WINK!!1!!
>
> COMERSHUL BRAKE...
>
> THIS WEEK ON THE DUBBA DUBBA DUBBA YOU BEE BE SURE TO WATCH UNHAPILY
> EVER AFTER TO SEE IF BOBKAT GOLDTHWATE IS STILL WITHOUT SHAME. BUT THE
> DOTTIR DOES HAVE NICE THINGIES!11!! THERE THAT"LL HOOK YOU IN!!1!1!
>
> LEELOO; HELO I AM LEELOO AND I SAY TO BUY THIS MAKEUP BECUZ I USED TO
> LOOK ALL WEERD WITH ORANGE HARE BUT NOW I LOOK LIEK A PRETTY WON!!!1!
>
> CUT TO MEAN WON VAMPIER HIDEOUT
>
> SPIEK; WELL HEAR WE SIT IN OUR HIDEOUT TRYING TO DEFEET BUFFIE!!1!!
>
> ANKEL; YES SHE WAS A SOMEWHAT NCIE PEECE OF HIGHNIE BUT NOW I MUST
> MAEK HER DYE!!!11!
>
> DROOSHILA; SOMETIEMS I LIKE MOON PIES
>
> SPIEK; HEY WHAT"S THAT SOUND??/?? SOMEWON"S COMING IN THE WINDO!!1!!
>
> ANKEL; IT"S VAMPIER HUNTER H!!!!111!
>
> ALL MEAN WON VAMPIERS; OH CARP!!11!! WE"RE OUTTA HEAR!!11!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; NOT IF I CAN HELP IT!11!! HIGH KEEBA!111!! HEAR
> COME THE STEAKS!!1!!!
>
> SPIEK; OH CARP I HAVE BEN STAKED!!11!
>
> DROOSHILA; OK DINTY DO"NT KILL ME!1!!! WE CAN HAEV RELASHUNS!!1!!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; HEY DO YOU HAEV A FREND HOO LIVES IN DAWSINS"
> CREEK? ANYWAY IF WE HAVE KIDS THEY WILL BE VAMPIERS BECUZ IT"S A
> DOMINANT TRATE AND THIS IS CLEERLY THE CASE WHEN WE REGARD THE CHI
> SQUAURE!!1!!1 SORRY I MUST STAKE YOU WITH MY WOOD NO NOT THAT
> WOOD!!11!!
>
> ANKEL; OK DINTY H I AM COMING FOR YOU!!1!!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; OH YAH WEL I CAN USE A SORD TOO!!1!! BRING IT
> ON!!11!
>
> ANKEL; YOU"RE MOTHER NEVER TOLD YOU ABOUT YOUR FATHER!111!!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; SHE TOLD ME ENUFF!11!1 SHE TOLD ME IT WAS A MEAN
> WON VAMPIER AND THAT SHE KILLED HIM!11!!
>
> ANKEL; NO DINTY!!1!!! I AM YOUR FATHER!!1!!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; NO!!1!!! I"LL NEVER JOYN YOU!!1!!
>
> ANKEL; YOU"RE WORIED ABOUT CORDEELIA?/?? WELL IF YOU WO"NT BECOME A
> VAMPIER THEN PERHAPS SHE WILL!!1!1
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; NEVER!!11!!1 OK I STAKED YOU WITH THIS SORD THAT
> WILL MAEK YOU DIE!!1!!
>
> ANKEL; TELL BUFFIE YOU WERE RITE ABOUT ME!1!! I AM JUST A MEAN WON
> VAMPIER!1!! OH NO I AM DED NOW!!11
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; YES AND I"LL BEE LAFFING MY HEAD OFF WHEN YOU"RE
> BURNING IN HELL!!1!! AS JON MAGLOCKLIN SAYS BYE BYE!!!!11!! NEXT
> ISHOO!!1!!!
>
> BACK IN THE LIBRARIE...
>
> J. GEILS; GEE I WONDER WHEAR DINTY H IS?/?? I HOEP HE IS OK!1!!
>
> BUFFIE; I HOEP MY BOYFREND IS OK!1!1
>
> WILLO; YES I THINK I FOUND THE SPELL TO SAVE ANKEL IN THE MAJIK
> CHATROOM!!1!! THEY ALSO SAY PENNY AND HORACE AER GOING TO ROOL THIS
> YEAR!!11!!
>
> ZANDER; HOO CARES ABOUT YOU"RE DUMDUM BOYFREND HE WILL PROBABLIE KILL
> ME TONITE ANYWAY!11!
>
> CORDEELIA; HEY LOOK HEAR COMES DINTY H THRU THE WINDO!!1!!
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; YES I"M BACK AND DO"NT WORRY BUFFIE I KILLED ANKEL
> AND ALL THE OTHER MEAN WON VAMPIERS!!1!!
>
> BUFFIE; O NO!1!1!
>
> J. GEILS; YES BUFFIE DINTY AND ZANDER HAEV BROT ME EVIDENS SHOWING
> THAT YOU HAD INAPROPRIET RELASHUNSHIP WITH A MEAN WON VAMPIER!!1!!
>
> BUFFIE; THIS IS A VAST VAMPIER BAT WING CONSPIRASIE TO SMEER MY GOOD
> NAME!11!
>
> J. GEILS; WELL THE HOUSE OF WASHERS HAS VOTED AND WE HAEV IMPEECHED
> YOU AND WE ARE MAKING VAMPIER HUNTER H OUR NEW HUNTER!!!1!
>
> BUFFIE; FIEN!11! BE MEAN WONS TO ME I WILL JUST RUN AWAY ON A BUS!11!!
>
> ZANDER; YOU SHOOD"NT RUN ON A BUS YOU SHOOD SIT QUITLY AS NOT TO
> DISTRUB THE OTHER PASENGERS!!1!! TALK ABOUT A RUDE WON!!11!
>
> CORDEELIA; OH DINTY YOU ARE THE BEST DO YOU WANT TO HAEV A DATE WITH
> ME??/??
>
> DINTY H THAT"S ME; YES CORDEELIA THAT SOUNDS LOVLY!1!!1 WE CAN GO SEE
> ZORRO!!1!1 I HOEP I GET TO SEKIND BASS TONITE BECUZ YOU HAEV
> SKRUMPSHUS LUSHISS THINGIES!!1!!
>
> CORDEELIA; I THINK YOU WILL!!1!!
>
> EVERYWON; HOORAY FOR THE BEST VAMPIER HUNTER DINTY H!!11!!
>
> PUPPET; ARGH GURR!!1!!
>
> Todd
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