S.Isaac Dealey wrote: > I can occasionally indulge in "mindless entertainment" ... not for too > long tho... If I sit for too long I become agitated by my lack of > progress on personal programming projects. The goal of transitioning > from "wage slave" (otherwise known as "someone's bitch") to "has what > appears to be at least minor influence in the shape of his own life" > is really important to me... which goes back to the pending divorce, > the child support and the larger reasons for my being depressed in the > first place. If the child support award weren't so high, I wouldn't > consider myself a "wage slave", but there's no way for me to do > anything about it without earning even more than I earn now, and even > if I did earn enough to do something about it, the odds are greater > that my attorney would stab me in the back and I'd be worse off than I > am now (or no worse off, but no better, plus being out the money).
A couple of things here. First, it sounds like your general situation is driving you a bit batty. I can understand that -- you and I have had conversations about it in the past. You do what you can, and move on. Easier said than done, eh? However, if you can't be still, not doing things, not making progress, then you've got a serious issue there. Feeling compelled to be accomplisihing something all the time will absolutely drive you crazy, and I mean that in a fairly clinical way. It leads to overwhelming anxiety, depression, and all those things we associate with lame people babbling to shrinks about their mothers from back in the '80s. The reality is, if you can't sit back and enjoy a moment, you won't enjoy much of anything at all. Talk with T, your friends, a therapist if necessary, and look at finding ways to deal with this. In the end, not being productive once in a while, and having some fun, will make you way more productive when you are working. My well-earned $0.02. :-) Trust me, I've been shopping in this store before! --Ben ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| Discover CFTicket - The leading ColdFusion Help Desk and Trouble Ticket application http://www.houseoffusion.com/banners/view.cfm?bannerid=48 Message: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=i:5:166010 Archives: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/threads.cfm/5 Subscription: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=s:5 Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/unsubscribe.cfm?user=89.70.5 Donations & Support: http://www.houseoffusion.com/tiny.cfm/54
