>> identify as bisexual), but I'm not going to tell >> them that it will be easy or that they will ever >> find that one person who fulfills them completely >> (which I think is a Disneyism anyway). >> >> I think monogamy might work a lot better in a >> culture in which families / communities were more >> involved with each other -- that is -- our culture >> seems hell-bent on this idea of making your >> monogamous romantic partner your sole source of >> social fulfillment (or in the case of metrosexuals >> yourself). As time passes we're gradually eroding >> all our other social interactions outside of those >> that occur with this monogamous partner if not >> solely with this partner. Or so it seems to me... >> I don't think I'm alone, although I've been told >> on more than one occasion that I'm "just whining" >> about some imaginary thing I've invented.
> Nope. I'm there with you on this one. I'm not > looking for someone to be my end-all-be-all-answer > -to-everything. I'm looking for someone who fills > some of the places not filled by my sisters, > parents, friends, etc. The best relationship I > ever had included her going out with the girls > regularly, and me geeking out with the boys. :-) Well it seems fairly easy to find people who agree with that sentiment... The reason people tell me I'm whining about something imaginary usually is because they disagree that our culture is encouraging the Disneyism... Personally I think that the mere fact that we have the Disneyism (exemplified by Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, the Little Mermaid, etc.) is sort of anecdotal evidence that the culture is really driving in that direction of eroding vertical social involvement. There is also this little matter of that whenever I am depressed and I reach out to people, I frequently hear "cling to (insert significant other's name here)! The two of you can get through it all together!"... Don't get me wrong, I LOVE tiff... I just don't know that I really feel that any single person can or should be my only source... And sometimes it's not even because the thing that's on my mind has anything at all to do with our relationship -- sometimes it's because I'm excited about something she's not interested in, and sometimes it's because I need to bitch to someone who hasn't heard about the subject of the bitch session from me before. It's increasingly frustrating to me that I find it rather easy to find friends who will talk with me and seem to genuinely care (like several from this list) but that it remains difficult to find friends locally who have time to spend in person. (Don't get me started on the catch-22 that is looking for a boyfriend.) I'd like to hope that also has a lot to do with my location -- it certainly seems that my social options are more limited here in Ft Lauderdale than they were in Dallas... Unfortunately I'm still not at a place where I seem to have any ability to decide where I want to live, so I'm more or less "stuck" with the social climate I find myself in geographically. At the moment that means my friends locally are my co-workers, and that's just a crappy place to be... My co-workers are nice people, but you can only share so many common interests with someone you only met because you needed a job and happened to be good at constructing SQL queries. hiring manager: So... how do you feel about the work of George Orwell? applicant: Is that a technical question? hiring manager: No, I'm just so lonely... will you be my friend? Would you like some champaG'n? s. isaac dealey 954.522.6080 new epoch : isn't it time for a change? add features without fixtures with the onTap open source framework http://www.fusiontap.com http://coldfusion.sys-con.com/author/4806Dealey.htm ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| Find out how CFTicket can increase your company's customer support efficiency by 100% http://www.houseoffusion.com/banners/view.cfm?bannerid=49 Message: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=i:5:167073 Archives: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/threads.cfm/5 Subscription: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=s:5 Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/unsubscribe.cfm?user=89.70.5 Donations & Support: http://www.houseoffusion.com/tiny.cfm/54
