Note to mikeyD The message appeared in the archives but i never got mine
anyone else miss it?
Well the first ones that is?


Yea its crap like that makes me want to get a Donated egg and have a taste
tube kid.
Man thats just typical crap that you shouldn't have to put up with. She
should be able to work together for whats best for the kids. And i really
don't think its you thats causing the problem if anything perhaps taking you
to court to fight for the kids because YOU're ruining them in school is just
a way to give her more time to hopefully fix the problem. I personally think
its on her end somewhere but talk to a counselor see what they think.

Human race might not make it forever if we can't have kids for fear of
people screwing with ya for the rest of your life.

Good luck to you in your tough situation.


----- Original Message -----
From: "Phillip B" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: "CF-Community" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Thursday, March 06, 2003 10:07 AM
Subject: RE: Need some advice


Thanks Larry.



I feel like she's using it as an excuse too. I just don't know the best way
to handle it. Ever since the divorce it has been a nightmare trying to work
out any issues we may have with the kids. She gets angry with me and then
threatens to take me to court over it. Ugh!



I feel like it will put more stress on the boys by spending less time with
me. She doesn't seem to think so.



I will get in touch with the school and see what they say. At least I might
be able to find out who, if any one, agreed with her on changing the custody
arrangement.



You know its crap like this that makes not want to get married again.



Phillip B







>Here is the deal. I have been divorced for about two years and have
>two boys that are 6 and 7. About six months after I had moved out my
>ex was living with another man and got married about a year after that
>to him. She has moved around town about 4 times in two years.
>
>Well, my seven year old has been getting in a lot of trouble at school.
>He likes to give a lot of attitude and refuses to do what he is told.
>His mom thinks these problems have a lot to do with the divorce and
>all the things that have happened since then.
>
>She has now come up with a solution to it. She thinks that the boys
>spend to much time at my house and should be at hers more to give them
>a more stable environment. She said she has felt this way for a while
>and that people at the school and else where have said that they
>should spend more time in one place. That all the travel back and
>forth is to much for the kids to handle.
>
>Right now they come over every Wednesday after school until I take
>them to school the next day. Then I get them every othe weekend from
>Friday after school until Monday before school. She wants to change it
>to every other weekend Friday night until Sunday after noon.
>
>I want the best for my boys but I cant see how taking them away from
>me will help. What should I do?
>
>Phillip B.


The kid is definately acting out, but from the sounds of it, (I'm no expert
here), its not having to do with your custody arrangements.

Its my own guess that their moving every few months and the divorce have
more to do with the acting out behavior than their staying over Wednesday
nights and every second weekend.

I'd contact a good child psychologist and have him or her talk with the
kids. it may be very helpful. You could also talk with the school more and
find out when the most problems occur - Wednesdays and Thursdays.

I suspect that your ex is using this issue to make a change in custody
arrangments rather than what is best for the kid.

regards,

larry


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