First off, I am running Debian 9, Stretch. I know it is old and I should upgrade and that is something I want to do.

The primary problem is that I have a lot of important systems (email, cloud), and other less important (web host). Simple dist-upgrades have always broken my mail server, that I was not immediately able to recover (fortunately, I had made a backup before). I have tried a couple of times to upgrade, but all attempts have failed. Thus, why I am still stick on 9. I don't like it, and still want to upgrade.

All that said, also I have been stuck on installing a simple nvidia driver, also for months. I can install both the backports version and the downloaded from nvidia version, but a driver can never be loaded because of some linux headers error.  I know nvidia and linux have never been nice to each other.

I think these problems are related.

I currently have 4.19.0-0.bpo.amd64 headers. I try rebuilding them, also tried going back to 4.9.0-13--but the former still stays. the nvidia installer always says it can't find the kernel to build the driver. If my system keeps saying it's 4.19.0-0.bpo, why isn't it in the standard location? I have tried to locate it, but I cannot find it?

How can i find the linux header, to point my driver to?

thanks in advance, sorry for the long sob story.

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