Here's my feedback Alan:
*p9.*
> You can install the current OpenSolaris release on your system from
> the OpenSolaris Live
> CD. Or, you can download a bootable image of the OpenSolaris operating
> system and run it
> in a virtual machine on your system.
You don't need to download the iso to install in a vm - it can also be
done from the Live CD (which is correctly addressed later on). Maybe
something like: "You can install the current OpenSolaris release on your
system from the OpenSolaris Live CD. To create the Live CD, you can
download a bootable image of the OpenSolaris operating system. If your
plans are to install OpenSolaris in a virtual machine, it can be
installed from the bootable image directly (no need to create the
physical CD). An image is..."
*p9.*
"for install and manage" should be "*to* install and manage"
*p10.
*
> Select a build version with components for managing or creating your
> own custom OpenSolaris image.
What are you getting at here? Is this bullet necessary?
*p15.*
The number of installation options seems overly complex. I would suggest:
* To install the OpenSolaris 2009.06 release from the Live CD onto
your system, ...
* To install the OpenSolaris 2009.06 release into a virtual machine,
see...
* To upgrade from an earlier OpenSolaris release to the OpenSolaris
2008.06 release, see...
And then I would create a separate section dedicated to each option.
*p19. *
> Select a build version with components for managing or creating your
> own custom OpenSolaris image.
This reference seems kind of silly since we're already on p19 and the
DDU is the next topic. Can't we just say "which is described next"?
*p21.*
I didn't notice it mentioned anywhere that the OpenSolaris partition
needed to be primary. This should probably be noted.
*p26.*
> You can resize existing partitions, delete partitions, and create new
> partitions in this panel.
In the 2nd bullet, you discuss the ramifications of this. Instead, I
think the 2nd bullet should be a note that's part of the first bullet.
Given the limitations of the OpenSolaris partitioner, it's unlikely that
anyone would use it.
*p29.*
> You can resize existing partitions, delete partitions, and create new
> partitions in this panel.
Unfortunately not true. Please see:
http://defect.opensolaris.org/bz/show_bug.cgi?id=64
*p30.*
> Howto Install from the Live CDifYour SystemBoots in Console Mode
Is this topic really necessary for the GSG? It seems like it should just
be on a wiki somewhere.
*p31. *
> The VirtualBox software supports the following host operating systems.
For completeness, OpenSolaris should also be in this list.
*p32. *
Why are we pointing folks to the Sun Download Center rather than
VirtualBox.org? Shouldn't we at least be consistent (point them there
for OpenSolaris too)?
*p36.*
> If you are using a downloaded OpenSolaris ISO image, select ISO Image
> File, then proceed to Step 11.
As Step 11 is the next step, why not just include this information right
here and be done w/ it? Especially because there is no step 12.
*p36.*
You walk the reader through starting the Live CD, but why is this
specific to VirtualBox? The same steps need to happen when doing a
native installation. You can probably just skip them altogether (like
you do in the next section, "Running OpenSolaris in Parallels").
*p40.*
> The quickest way to obtain essential information about your network is
> to look at theNetwork
> Status panel icon that is displayed in the panel notification area of
> theGNOMEDesktop at all
> times.
Since the icon's are so small, it would be worth including them in the
guide (both NIC and wirless examples for the Network Monitor).
*p42.*
The snapshot of the Package Manger GUI appears outdated (2008.11).
*p43.*
> The default repository for the release is the opensolaris.org repository
Shouldn't it be "opensolaris.org*/release*"
*p43.*
> Before you use this repository, refer to the release notes at
I would suggesting putting a bit more of a warning here, as setting up
this repository will take you off of the tested and supported 2009.06
release. You'll be running development builds of the operating system,
which isn't recommended for most. I would suggest adding a "*caution*"
in bold as you did with contrib and moving it to the bottom of the list.
*p44.*
I would format the caution on the pending repository just as you did on
contrib. Pending is even more dangerous than contrib.
*p47.*
> These profiles are assigned to special user accounts that are called
> roles.
But profiles can also be assigned to users. The question that's unclear
is the difference b/w a profile and a role (as both can be assigned to
users).
*p47.*
> Predefined profiles are also included in the OpenSolaris software.
I thought all profiles were predefined. Maybe "The profiles in
OpenSolaris are predefined."
*p47.*
> The Primary Administrator profile has all authorizations assigned to
> it, so the profile is effectively the
> same as assuming the root role on a system.
So sorta to my question above, is there an advantage to one approach
over the other? Is there a reason I would "pfexec su" versus "pfsh"?
Unfortunately, I don't know the answers to these questions myself (but
Christoph Schuba would).
*p48.*
"Roles *and profiles *can also be assigned"
*p52.*
> The services that can be viewed and managed in the desktop depend on
> the authorizations that
> are assigned to the user account and the service itself.
>
> Many SMF services have the solaris.smf.manage.service authorizations
> associated with them,
> which allows you to manage just that service.
>
> In addition, the following profiles are associated with managing services:
>
> * ServiceManagement profile: This profile allows you to manage or
> modify the properties onany service.
> * Service Operator profile: This profile allows you to enable or
> disable any service, but not modify the properties of the service.
>
I'm not sure all of this detail is necessary in the GSG. As a new user
with the System Administrator profile, I will not have to worry about
any of this.
Also, Do you know if 2009.06 is shipping with the visual panels (as the
Toshiba's did)? If so, the UI is quite different (for the better).
Also, you cover the command line for services but not IPS. I think we
should be consistent.
*p60.*
> pfexec pkg image-update
>
> * Alternately, you can use the pkg image-update command to
> perform that same task.
>
> $ pkg image-update [-nv]
Both commands are the same and only need to be listed once.
*p63.*
> In addition, starting with the OpenSolaris 2009.06 release, you can
> use the PackageManager
> to manage your boot environments as follows:
This can also be done with 2008.11.
*p68.*
> Then, execute the add_drv
If you're going to give this much detail, it's probably useful to also
provide an example.
*p73.*
Why only a beadm command reference. I would think you'd want to
reference 'pkg' and 'svcs' and 'svcadm' as well. This may address the
issue I raised above. You can cover the GUIs in the main text and then
refer to the appendix for the command reference (including some examples).
Regards,
Brian
alan mcclellan wrote:
> A couple of corrections/clarifications:
>
> * Please reply to this thread with review comments.
>
> * Also, the document can be found directly from here:
>
> http://opensolaris.org/os/community/documentation/reviews/GSG_200906_Review.pdf
>
--
William Brian Leonard
Technology Evangelist
408.404.6884
http://blogs.sun.com/observatory
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