Brin sat at the desk in the den of the house that Andor had bought. Gods .. that sounded like some weird children's nursery rhyme. But it was true. She looked down at the blank piece of parchment and sighed. Her determination hadn't wavered since she'd told Andor her plan the night before, she just had no idea what the hell to write.
Last nights little get together between her, Lani, Rue and andor had gone just as bad as it had every OTHER time the two men had sat down. Both were stubborn. Both were prone to violence. And right now she felt like a badly frayed piece of rope. Information had come to light since the last time she'd spoken with Rue. He'd just come back from Larmia and had told her the help his sister had given him to keep the more violent manifestations of the curse away. He'd showed her things his sister had sent back to help protect her and the baby. And she'd agreed, without consulting Andor, to go with him back to Larmia for some type of ritual .. Andor was having none of it. She loved the man .. and she KNEW he loved her, but her whole history with Rue was raising his hackles worse than a cat in a stable of riled horses. She couldn't please -everyone-. No matter how much she tried. And she was trying, but Andor wanted things done -his- way and no other .. and she felt guilty every time that twinge of annoyance crept in. She was an independent woman. True .. she hadn't acted like it the past few months as she worked through Rue's rejection, and being tugged this way and that between Rue and Andor's demands on what should be done for the children, who the parental authority would be, and her own health had her ready to pull her damn hair out. What the two failed to see was that it wasn't THEIR children! THEY weren't carrying them within their bodies! they didn't have deal with the mood swings and the nausea. The sleepless nights of worry and the nightmares. Nor the swollen ankles or the stretch marks for that frigging matter. Yet she was called on time and time again to mediate the growling exchanges between two men she cared very much for. The current stopping point in the whole shebang was the children ... and who would appear to be their father. Who would raise them in essence. She'd from the beginning, planned on having Rue be very much a part of these children's lives. he was their father. Biology. Reluctant or not, and no matter how Andor wished otherwise .. nothing would change that. She refused to cheat Rue out of the joys and pains of raising his children .. and she wouldn't hurt Andor by making his sit on the sidelines and grow resentful. So she'd made a decision that had driven sleep away from her for the past two nights. Out of Andor's sight and hearing she'd cried and prayed .. looking for some kind of answer, and during a particularly dark hour she'd considered running away. Heading home. Her father may be a bastard, but he'd never try to make up her mind for her. But she'd stayed, reconciled to lying in this bed she'd made. She reached for the pen and dunked it into the inkwell and began writing. Rue So many things are different now .. so many more things have changed .. but what hasn't changed is the fact that your are the father of these children. After last nights fiasco .. and please no accusation or recriminations, I can't take any more, i've come to a decision. Upon the birth of the twins .. *and here was where her hand faltered. She closed her eyes and drew strength from a dwindling supply within her and continued* I will have the midwife take them .. and give them to a wet nurse. She will then take them to Brookshire where they will be handed over to you. *the scratching of the dry pen over the parchment jerked her back from her misery and she jerkily dunked it back into the inkwell, causing a splotch of the black liquid to stain the paper near his name at the top. She continued writing* I won't have this tear any of us apart any longer. They are -your- children and will bear your name. All that I ask ... all that I ask is that you let me see them from time to time .. to let them know that it was me that gave them birth. I don't know if this is the right decision .. But it's my final one. Your choice is to take them .. or loose them. You know Andor's desires here .. and I want them to be with their real father .. because they should know you as such .. and because you deserve it .. I guess. There will be no more meetings .. i learned my lesson well from the last one. Contact me as soon as you can with a decision. Brin Winter She sat there, staring down at the paper until they blurred as the tears came. She wished she could go back .. wished she could change things .. but this was reality and there was nothing to be done for it but go foreword. She leaned back in the chair and wiped at her cheeks, sniffing and clearing her throat. Sitting up again she reached for the sand shaker and sent the grains over the letter to soak up the ink so it wouldn't smear, then stood and moved away from the desk toward the dying fire in the hearth. Her robe did nothing to hide the growing swell of her stomach, and the shadows in the room thankful hid the circles beneath her eyes. She would send it off tomorrow with a messenger and things would be set in motion. She hoped. She just wanted this done. She was tired and unhappy right now .. none of them were happy, and the prospect of children coming into this world should fill them all with joy. She settled onto the couch before the fire and leaned back, closing her eyes, and before she knew it, had slipped into sleep, her hands covering her stomach where the twins rested. *~**~**~**~**~* Jax ---- #Blkdragon*inn channel operator, and typo demon extrodinaire We all think we're ordinary, it's others that think we're extraordinary. - Me (On going to war over religion) "You're basically killing each other to see who's got the better imaginary friend." -Yasir Arrafat (PLO leader) (On cost overuns) "One way to ensure that it is not a major achievement for mankind" was to pass the budget limit. Rep. (Dana Rohrabacher, a California Republican) <Kylus> What was that really bad vamp movie you saw over the summer? <Kaejo> Dracula: Lord of the Dance The only disability in life is a bad attitude. - Scott Hamilton http://jaxitty.tripod.com/index.html http://members.tripod.com/Jaxitty/ZI.html -- To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Archives & Other DMI Lists: http://www.dragonmyst.f2s.com/lists.php3
