He said smerti. hehehe
Jamie
On Thursday 31 May 2001 09:15 am, you wrote:
> Translation by me... hehe...
>
> Jim Darrough wrote:
> > > Captain: Is the new fire control Windows OS installed yet Comrade?
>
> Nashi novi operativnaya sistema za kontrol ogna 'Okna' zainstalerobal uzhe?
>
> > > Seaman: Almost Sir. We just need to finish filling out the
> > > registration card.
>
> Pochti, gospodin. nuzhno tolo zapolnit' registratsiyu.
>
> > > Captain: Excellent. Soon we will be able to point and click our
> > > enemies into oblivian.
>
> Otlichno, skoro mozhem pointerobat' i klikerobat' nashi vragi vo polnoe
> unichtozhenije
>
> > > [evil laughter in background]
>
> WEG
>
> > > Seaman: Comrade Captain! It is booting! Look, it says "Preparing to
> > > run Windows for the first time".
> > > [long pause]
>
> Tovarish' Kapitan!! nachinaetsya!! posmotri, govorit "pripremyu izpolzovat'
> 'Okna' za pervij raz"
>
> > > Seaman: Arrgh! Sir, it wants me to reboot again. That makes the 27th
> > > time.
>
> Chyort!! Gospodin, khochetsya nacinat'cya opyat. Znatchet 27 raz.
>
> > > Captain: Hmmm. This is not encouraging. Go ahead and reboot again.
>
> Hmmm... To ne pojdyot. Davaj eshsho raz.
>
> > > Seaman: Aye Sir.
> > > [another long pause]
>
> Tak tochno, Gospodin.
>
> > > Seaman: Captain, it is up again. It says it found new hardware ... A
> > > CD-ROM drive and that it needs drivers.
>
> Kapitan, edyot opyat. Skazal to shto nashyol novije schtuki... CD-ROM i to
> schto driveri nuzhni.
>
> > > Captain: Where are the drivers?
>
> I gde jest eti driveri?
>
> > > Seaman: On the CD-ROM.
>
> Na CD-ROM.
>
> > > Captain: You are joking, right?
>
> Vi shutitje, da?
>
> > > Seaman: No Sir.
>
> Nyet, gospodin.
>
> > > Captain: Reboot the damn thing again. I am starting not to like this
> > > Windows.
> > > [another long pause]
>
> perevkluchitje tu durstbu opyat. Ya nachinayu ne ljubit' eti 'Okna'.
>
> > > Seaman: Sir! It is back! It says it found the Gorby2000 Torpedo and is
> > > looking for the device drivers. Do we have a driver disk?
>
> Gospodin! rabotaet eshsho! Govorit to schto nachal torpedo 'Gorbi2000' i
> ishchit sejchas driveri. U nas jest disk so driveriami?
>
> > > Captain: I do not think so.
>
> Ne dumaju tak.
>
> > > Seaman: I will tell it to use the default drivers.
> > > [another long pause]
>
> Ya skazhu potom uzpolzovat' normalnimi driverami.
>
> > > Seaman: Crap. It wants to reboot again.
>
> Yob Tebja? Khochetcya perevkluchit opyat.
>
> > > Captain: How many times are we going to reboot today? This is taking
> > > forever. Our hull is going to rust out before this works.
> > > [another long pause]
>
> Skolko raz nuzhno to delat' sevogdnya? prodolzhayetsya na vsegda. Ne
> budyet nasha lodka to to vremja, kogda vsyo rabotayet.
>
> > > Seaman: Sir! It is up and this time it is not asking for anything!
>
> Gospodin!! Rabotayet i nichevo ne sprosil.
>
> > > Captain: Really? No device drivers? No registration cards? No user
> > > profiles?
>
> Neuzhali? Driveri nyetu? Registratsiji nyetu? Profili Nyetu?
>
> > > Seaman: No Sir. I think it is ready.
>
> Nyet, Gospodin, vsyo gotovo.
>
> > > Captain: Good work comrade. Now click on the fire control icon and
> > > let us see how this works.
>
> Otlichno, Tovarishch. Klikirobat' na ikon za kontrol ogna i uvidim kak
> rabotayet.
>
> > > Seaman: Clicking now, Sir.
>
> Klikiruyu cejchas, Gospodin.
>
> > > [another long pause]
> > >
> > > Captain: Why does the fire control screen have a dancing paper clip
> > > on it?
>
> Pochemy jest tansuyushoje oborudovaniye kabineta na ekranje?
>
> > > Seaman: I have no idea Sir.
>
> Chyort evo znayet, Gospodin.
>
> > > Captain: Hmmm, well try clicking on the menu.
>
> Interesno. potom klikirovat na 'Menu'.
>
> > > Seaman: Aye Sir. Let us see; Open E-mail, Spam a friend, Mail a Virus,
> > > Fire a Torpedo.
>
> Tak tochno, Gospodin. posmotrim: otkryt ilectronisticheskuyu pochtu,
> poslat' 'spam' k drugu, poslat' virus, puskat' torpedo.
>
> > > Captain: We will spam a friend later. Let us fire a torpedo.
>
> Spam potom. Torpedo sejchas.
>
> > > Seaman: Aye Sir.
>
> Tak tochno Gospodin.
>
> > > [another long pause]
> > >
> > > Seaman: It is asking us to load the torpedo and to click when ready.
>
> Skaza zaderzhit' i gotovnost' dolozhit'.
>
> > > Captain: Torpedo room, load a torpedo in tube number 1!
>
> Torpedisti!! Zaderzhit' nomer 1 i gotovnost' dolozhit'!!
>
> > > [intercom:] This is the Torpedo room. The torpedo is loaded Sir.
>
> Torpedisti zdjes'. Torpedo zaderzhan.
>
> > > Captain: Click on the continue button.
>
> Klikerobat' na knopku 'prodolzhenje'.
>
> > > Seaman: Aye Sir.
>
> Tak tochno, Gospodin.
>
> > > [another long pause]
> > >
> > > Seaman: It is asking for a target Sir.
>
> Sprashivayet za tsel', Gospodin.
>
> > > Captain: Hmmm, target the Rainbow Warrior.
>
> Hmmm.... vosmozhno lodka 'Rainbow Warrior'?
>
> > > Seaman: Aye Sir. Damn! It says the torpedo is low on ink.
>
> Tak tochno, Gospodin. Chyort!! govorit to schto b torpedje chernily nyetu.
>
> > > Captain: Click ignore. We will get some ink when we return to base.
>
> Klikovat' na 'ignoriruyu'. Perepolnim na baze.
>
> > > Seaman: Aye Sir. We are ready to fire.
>
> Tak tochno, Gospodin. Gotovi za pusk.
>
> > > Captain: Very good. You may fire when ready comrade.
>
> Otlichno. Ogon!!
>
> > > Seaman: Firing torpedo Sir.
>
> Ogon!!
>
> > > [another really long pause]
> > >
> > > Captain: Well?
>
> I tak?
>
> > > Seaman: I am trying Sir. Nothing is happening. Wait a minute....
>
> Probuyu, Gospodin. Nichevo ne proizojdyot. Podozhditje nemnozhechku.
>
> > > [a loud explosion is heard in the background followed by screaming on
> > > intercom]
> > >
> > > Captain: WTF was that?!?!?
>
> Yob tebja!! schto eto bylo?
>
> > > Seaman: Captain! A new screen has appeared!
>
> Kapitan!! Novij Ekran pojavilsya.
>
> > > Outlook Express Fire Control has performed an illegal operation and
> > > will be shut down.
>
> Outlook Express Ognevij Kontrol cdelano zapreshenuyu operatsiju i
> zakonchitsya.
>
> > > Click 'OK' to continue.
>
> Klikirovat' 'OK' schtobi prodolzhat'.
>
> > > Seaman: Oh my God! The paper clip has died! What should I do?
>
> Bozhe!! klippi umyer. Schto delat'?
>
> > > Captain: Shut it down! Shut it down!
>
> Bykluchit'!! Bykluchit'!!
>
> > > Seaman: It is not responding Sir!
>
> Na zapros ne otvechayet, gospodin!!
>
> > > Captain: Try 'CTRL-ALT-DELETE'!
>
> Poprobuj 'CTRL-ALT-DELETE'!!
>
> > > Seaman: Aye Sir. We are in luck! The task manager is still operating.
> > > I am instructing the task manager to shut down Outlook Fire Control.
>
> Tak tochno Gospodin. Nam pojdyot. Manedger eshcho rabotayet. Ya skazhu
> manedger vykluchit' Outlook Ognevij Kontrol.
>
> > > [another long pause]
> > >
> > > Seaman: The task manager says that Outlook Fire Control is not
> > > responding.
>
> Manedger govorit to schto Outlook Ognevij Kontrol na zapros ne otvechayet.
>
> > > Captain: Well no shit. Tell it to 'end task'.
>
> Ne khuya!! Skazhite 'zakonchit zadachu'.
>
> > > Seaman: Nothing is happening Sir.
>
> Nichevo ne proizhodit, Gospodin.
>
> > > Captain: Try 'CTRL-ALT-DELETE' again.
>
> Poprobuj 'CTRL-ALT-DELETE' eshcho raz.
>
> > > Seaman: Aye Sir.
> > > [sounds of frantic pecking on keyboard.]
>
> Tak tochno, Gospodin.
>
> > > Seaman: Oooh! What a pretty blue screen!
>
> Oj Vy!! Takoj krasivij sinnij ekran.
>
> > > Captain: Holy Shit! Not the blue screen of dea....
>
> Govno!! ne sinnij ekran smerti.....
>
> > > [KABLAM! A really big explosion. More screaming and the sound of
> > > rushing water.]
> > > --------------------------------------------------------
> > > The tape ends at this point.
>
> --
> I do what the voices on my console
> tell me to do.
