"If you feel you need a more personal expression, please do not hesitate to contact me and share your grievance."
This self-serving advertisement is unworthy of a former TM Governor. --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "John M. Knapp, LMSW" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > Thanks, TurquoiseB, for your extremely kind words. I'll try to live up to them! > > Thanks, also for your story about Rachel. Yeah, I can see myself in that story -- both the > hurtful side and the changed side. > > My journey toward change *began* in leaving TM. I sought out exit counseling from Janja > Lalich and Margaret Singer in 1995-96. I offer them so many thanks. More than I can say. > > But in all honesty, their exit counseling had limited effect on me. It got me out of TM, and I > did finally stay out of TM after 3 previous tries to leave it. > > But I remained one screwed up puppy. Not only did I remain enraged and acting out on > AMT -- I even turned on these two people who tried to help me. I've apologized to Janja, > who graciously accepted my attempt to make amends. Unfortunately, Margaret died > before I could talk with her. That's a lesson I take to heart. I try to make amends now as > soon as I can. Life's too short and unexpected to waste any time. > > When I really started to reflect on my shit was when I entered therapy. It may not be for > everyone, but it definitely did some good for me. > > And, just as you surmise, professionally entering the helping professions in 1998 (as a > personal aide to autistic and developmentally challenged people) really turned my head > around. > > I haven't arrived. I still struggle mightily with nasty personal challenges, such as > narcissism. And I still act out from time to time. > > But I believe I have the tools to reflect on my feelings, thoughts, actions, beliefs and make > headway. > > I'll never be perfect. Perfection is a process, not a destination, to my way of thinking. > > But as I wrote recently: I'm busy becoming the man my teen-aged self would have been > proud of. And, finally at age 55, I see light at the end of that particular tunnel. > > In that spirit, I offer the individuals and the community that I may have harmed in the past > a sincere apology. If you feel you need a more personal expression, please do not hesitate > to contact me and share your grievance. > > Thanks again, TurquoiseB, for a chance to talk at some length on these matters. > > J. > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, TurquoiseB <no_reply@> wrote: > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "feste37" <feste37@> wrote: > > > > > > I'm not on a spiritual path, which is a meaningless phrase. > > > You're pretending to be all nicey-nice but I don't believe > > > a word of it. > > > > This speaks to your limitations, feste, not John's. > > > > I had a good friend in the Rama trip who was a real > > ball-busting bitch. She had the rep of having made > > *every person* in the companies she worked with cry > > as a result of her heartless treatment of them. > > > > Then she caught a clue and bailed from the Rama trip > > and, over time, found that she needed something new > > in her life. So she went back to school and became > > a psychologist, and began to practice at it. I saw > > her again a few years later and the change in her > > was truly amazing. Almost all of the "rough edges" > > had been polished off of her; she was in danger of > > being a truly balanced and wonderful human being. > > She attributed the change (which she was more than > > aware of, too) to having forced herself into a > > position in which she *had* to become compassionate > > and caring, as part of her *job description*. Work- > > ing with people who had come to her for help had > > forced her to *put aside* her own samskaras and > > focus on helping them with theirs. > > > > I'm betting that you have never placed yourself in > > such a position, feste, and that neither has Lawson > > or Judy. It shows. > > > > I, for one, notice rather a change in the way that > > John handles himself lately, compared to how he > > used to. That shows, too. He refuses to be baited > > into replying angrily and with malice, even when > > taunted by those who clearly mean him harm. Like > > Curtis, he tries to find a "middle way" whereby he > > can remain true to his own beliefs while not > > discounting or (more important) discrediting > > the beliefs of others. > > > > In short, I see John as Having Made Progress. And > > at the same time, I see the "on the program TMers" > > here who are giving him a hard time as having made > > none whatsoever. They are still stuck in the same > > reactivity and anger that they were when I first > > encountered them years ago. They still react by > > distrusting *anything* a TM critic says and by > > demonizing the critic. John doesn't. > > > > IMO, that kinda indicates that whatever John is > > doing *works*, and that whatever these TMers are > > doing *doesn't*. He's changing, in what most would > > consider a positive way, and his tormentors are not. > > > > John, if you're still reading this thread, I wonder > > if you can comment on what might have precipitated > > this change. My bet is that it's the same phenom- > > enon I saw in my friend Rachel. The very *process* > > of practicing a profession that *requires* that > > you transcend your samskaras to help others allows > > you to better transcend them. > > > > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "John M. Knapp, LMSW" > > > <jmknapp53@> wrote: > > > > > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "feste37" <feste37@> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > You're being deliberately obtuse. People who claim they were lied to > > > > > again and again are playing the victim. Maharishi didn't lie to you. > > > > > He gave you a wonderful technique for spiritual growth. It was > > you who > > > > > lacked understanding -- and then you betrayed the person who had > > > > > helped you. Shame. > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think it's too bad that you label people who disagree with you as > > > obtuse -- or any other > > > > hurtful label. > > > > > > > > I gave my definition of victimization. Your differs. > > > > > > > > Mine works for me. I'm sure yours works for you. > > > > > > > > I believe the Maharishi lied to me -- and to others. You don't. > > > > > > > > > > > > See? We can disagree without hurtfulness. > > > > > > > > I expect no less from someone following a spiritual path. > > > > > > > > J. > > > > > > > > > >
