Very nice piece.
--- In [email protected], TurquoiseB <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > [ I wrote this yesterday night, but didn't post it > at that time because it didn't seem to "fit" with > the topics being discussed. It still doesn't, but > here goes anyway. If Edg and Curtis can write about > their everyday lives as if they were some kind of > spiritual sadhana, I guess I can, too. - Unc ] > > "The mind is drawn to ever-increasing levels of bliss." > Or something to that effect. That's what the man said. > > Those are the first words that Maharishi spoke that > really *resonated* with me, all those years ago in the > Greek Theater in Los Angeles, 1967. For me, a BTDT > hippie searching for a saner path through life than > psychedelics, those words really "caught the wave" of > my life. At 21, I had *done* sex, drugs, and rock 'n > roll, right on the front lines of all three war zones, > and none of them (despite their undeniable charms) > had taken me where they had promised. So I was in > search of Something Else, another goal and path to > focus on to inspire me to keep on keepin' on. And > Maharishi just *nailed* it with that phrase. > > In retrospect, I suspect that even at the time, I > "signed on" more to that phrase, and that lifestyle, > than I "signed on" with Maharishi personally. But I > followed the path suggested by that phrase, and him, > and with heart, for fourteen years. And when the > time came when ever-increasing levels of bliss were > no longer found within the TM movement and with > Maharishi, I followed the spirit of what he had > said that day in the Greek Theater in Los Angeles, > even though it drew me away from him. > > I followed the bliss, not the man who had told me > about the bliss. And I thank him, in my way, for > being the first person in my life to ever put the > simple truth of "Follow your bliss" into words, > by living the truth of those words in my own life. > > I have pretty much *always* followed my bliss. Damn > making sense. Damn tradition. Damn career. Damn what > anyone else thinks of the irrational decisions I am > making. If the decisions lead me in the direction of > greater bliss (in my *own* definition of bliss, that > is, not anyone else's definition), then at this point > I really don't see the percentage in *not* following > the bliss. > > Doing so has worked out rather well for me for forty > years now. I've had one phwam! of a life as a result > of following Maharishi's advice about paying attention > to that which seems to offer increasing levels of > bliss. > > This is all relevant to me today because yesterday > I signed a lease on an apartment in a beach town > in Spain, and will be moving there in September. > To do this I will be leaving One Of My Best Designs > For Paradise So Far, in favor of another, hopefully > a more evolved design. > > I mean, I live right now inside one of my fantasies > from earlier in my life, in a tiny medieval village > where the heretics I am interested in as a writer > and as a spiritual seeker once trod. I live in an > apartment built on the original 10th-century city > walls in an apartment that costs me 450 Euros a > month, and would continue to cost me that for the > rest of my life. That is my agreement with the > Crumbs, should I choose to stay *for* the rest of > my days. That's quite an offer. The village is > wonderful, the offer is wonderful, and the Crumbs > are wonderful, and I'm moving to Spain anyway. > Go figure. > > Following one's bliss is all about that ineffable > quality of life that you can't put into words, try > as you might. For me, making this decision, it's > all about silence. How do you put *that* into words? > I stand on the ramparts of Sauve tonight and I feel > the level of silence here, and I marvel at its depth. > And then I take a deep breath and remember the > silence in Sitges...present in the most crowded > chiringuito, in the noisiest nightclub street, or, > moments later, in the deserted square in front of > the 15th-century church, gazing out to sea, and > there is just simply No Question about which level > of silence draws me more. > > I've tried my best to fight it. I've taken this > decision through all the sane, rational, intellectual > hoops, and moving to Spain makes no sense at all. It's > folly. But I'm moving anyway, and it's all about the > silence. > > The apartment I'll be living in there is on one of > the busiest streets in town, a block from the beach, > and full of crowds at all hours of the day or night. > But step inside the door and close it and miraculously, > the noise of that world just Goes Away and opens into > a pretty wonderful apartment. And then that apartment > opens onto The Garden. > > It was The Garden that did it. It's immense, lovely, > private, and with a level of silence in it that is > astounding. I sit in The Garden, only steps away from > the busiest street in a busy beach town, and samadhi > just overtakes me. It overtook me in the real estate > agent's office when I first saw it in a photograph of > the property. The moment I saw that photograph, I knew > I was a goner. Seeing the actual property was like an > afterthought, a formality that I had to go through, > even though the decision had been made. It was that > sudden. Go figure. > > So, although it makes no sense at all, I'm walking > away from the way cool situation in Sauve, my current > paradise, and "trading up" to another way cool situation > that beckons more strongly. > > It could be a real letdown. I might move there and > realize I've made a terrible mistake. But I don't > think that's going to happen, because the "follow > your bliss" signs are all there. I liked the selves > that danced across my Self when I was in Sitges, > and I'd like to see more of them dancing. I look > forward to many moonlight conversations in The > Garden, under the Catalunya moon, with people > I've met for the first time that day on the > busy, Tantric streets of Sitges. >
