Hi,

I'm new to this list, so I hope the following post is appropriate. It is 
also somewhat lengthy, for which I apologise - conciseness was never my 
strong point. But I am in search of a spot of advice, and wondered if anyone 
here could help...

I learned TM about nine months or so (I know, a newbie!). It appealed to me 
since whislt I consider myself in a sense spiritual, I am not religious, and 
TM seemed to offer a non-faith based approach to meditation. And it has not 
been entirely without benefit. But since then I have suffered increasingly 
from insomnia. Not to a dreadful degree, but I'm lucky if I get three hours 
sleep a night. Growing unhappy with my instructor's standard 'part of the 
process' response, I took a look online and found this wasn't entirely 
uncommon, and nor was it necessarily temporary. But, in addition, I also 
came upon the translations of the mantras. And here lies my real problem.

I am not overly bothered by the deception involved when I was told, on 
learning, that they are without meaning, since, for me at least, they were. 
But not any more. Now it seems to me that any universal truth has, by 
definition, to transcend cultures, or it is not universal. The laws of 
gravity, for example, might have been discovered in the west, but gravity 
works everywhere at all times no matter what it is called or how it is 
defined (well, a few claims to the contrary aside!). The processes of 
nature, the existence of the bundle of emotions and feelings we define as 
love, the existence of bad television shows...the list goes on, in all 
disciplines of life. And if meditation has value, then similarly, the same 
should be the case, must be the case.

So. There seem to me to be two possibilities. One, that the actual mantra 
used is irrrelvant, meaningless. Just a word to return to during meditation 
as a way of letting go of thought. But if this is so, why the insistence, in 
TM and indeed other traditions, on the use of particular mantras? Or two, 
that the mantra used is important, and does have meaning. But if this is so, 
then the technique is not universal but rooted in a particular culture. 
Moreover, when meditating I am in effect praying to a god not of my culture, 
and of whom I have no knowledge, which leaves me deeply uncomfortable.

There are, of course, non-mantra based meditations. But those that I have 
encountered seem based around the breath. And although this would indeed 
seem universal, what quiet I do find through TM comes when thought of breath 
has fallen away (as a woodwind musician, I am rarely unaware of, if not 
actively controlling, my breath).

Hmm. I'm not sure there is a question in the above, so much as a seeking of 
thoughts and opinion. Is the mantra used of importance? If so, why? If not, 
why?! Do there by any chance exist other non mantra-based, non-religious, 
'aimless' meditations? Are my thought processes described above flawed? If 
so, why and how?

Anyways, thanks for reading this far, and any advice would be greatfully 
received.

John

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