Nina
[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
Oh, Steve...I am so sorry...it's a good thing I work alone, because I'm absolutely crying my eyeballs out right now... :( It's wonderful people like you that make this world a more bearable place to be. I know Loki hasn't gone far and that you two will see each other again someday...oh, I'm crying again...just know that he's not alone, his sister as well as all of our furbabies who have gone before are with him sharing embarassing stories about their non-furparents!
Take care, you and Loki are in my thoughts,
Jen
----- Original Message ----- From: Steve Williams <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> Date: Thursday, March 31, 2005 2:52 pm Subject: Loki is at rest
My last little love is gone. I had to put him to sleep late yesterday.
For the past two weeks, my every waking moment and thought has been for and
about Loki. I did put him on Prednisone a week ago and it initial seemed to
help, but very quickly it was as before. I then called the vet and we
doubled his dosage. Once again, it initially seemed to help--
though he
seemed "drugged" this time--then quickly faded to his former uncomfortablestate. At no time, did the Pred noticeably shrink the large tumor impeding
his little lungs.
I had been letting him outside to wander in the tall spring grass (weeds)all around the house. He loved it and it was a great distraction and
wonderful sensory stimulation for him. If Loki did not have these wonderfuldays, I may have PTS sooner, as the nights were uncomfortable for him--he
could no longer lay on his side and his lungs were pumping hard all the
time.
Yesterday, too many changes took place: He was not enjoying the out-of-doors
like he had been, I did not see him drink water or eat his dry food, he
didn't want to bend down to eat his chicken baby food treat (had to hold it
up for him), and for the first time, he had a slightly open mouth. At most
other times during the day, he was lying or sitting with labored breathingand looking very tired. I felt it was the right time to stop subjecting
Loki's system to new measures, so I made the agonizing decision.
My 10 month, 10 day old Loki went peacefully and quickly and is now buried
next to his sister under "their" oak tree.
My beautiful brown/dark gray tiger kitty had a special personality, quite
different, but just as wonderful as his orange tabby sister Leeloo. Both
were chosen from the litter my sister and nieces were raising because their
stars seemed to burn very bright. These kittens--the smallest of the
litter--had unusually beautiful little souls. Loki also had a smell, as his
sister did; not the perfume my girl kitty Leeloo had, but the smoky earthy
scent of a boy kitty. Perhaps like air smells during the first rain on dry
soil. One could say his scent tended a tiny bit toward chocolate and even
cinnamon, like one lister noticed of her boy kitty. I will miss him jumping
up to lay at the back of my neck and bending around to rub his face against
mine, purring all the while; coming to lay on his pillow at the side of my
computer to be near me; and turning over to rub his back on the floor and to
get his belly rubbed.
I will be morning his loss for a long time... I can't see a time when I will
stop. I know my pain will ease eventually and I know there will soon be a
time that I will no longer be exhausted from crying. I loved my little Loki
like there was no tomorrow.
Steve
