Keith, If you can suggest the necessary edits using the OLD/NEW style, we can already include them in the tracker write-up. Please also include whatever edits resulted from my review. The document will be placed for approval on the agenda of the upcoming telechat which is scheduled for 7/3.
Thanks and Regards, Dan > -----Original Message----- > From: Keith McCloghrie [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > Sent: Monday, June 23, 2008 3:10 PM > To: Francis Dupont > Cc: [email protected]; [EMAIL PROTECTED]; [EMAIL PROTECTED]; > [EMAIL PROTECTED]; Romascanu, Dan (Dan) > Subject: Re: (full) review of draft-ietf-imss-fc-fcsp-mib-02.txt > > Thanks for your comments. I'm impressed that you were still > awake enough to find typos on page 183 :-), and if they can > all be handled by the RFC Editor, that's better for me. (I > expect others to "abuse" the Queen's English, but it's a > personal pain if I have to do so myself :-). > > Keith. > > > I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) > > reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see > > http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html). > > > > Please resolve these comments along with any other Last > Call comments > > you may receive. > > > > Document: draft-ietf-imss-fc-fcsp-mib-02.txt > > Reviewer: Francis Dupont > > Review Date: 2008-06-19 > > IETF LC End Date: 2008-06-19 > > IESG Telechat date: unknown > > > > Summary: Ready > > > > Comments: I've found only a low number of editorial (i.e., to be > > handled by the RFC Editor) problems (spelling errors, > typos, raw abbrevs, ...): > > (I've put a '?' after suggestions/questionable items, MIB names are > > for their descriptions) > > > > - ToC page 2: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments > > (i.e., US spelling, same in 7 page 232) > > > > - 1 page 3: IETF's -> IETF? (same in t11FcTcMIB page 27, > > t11FcSpAuthenticationMIB page 43, t11FcSpZoningMIB page 64, > > t11FcSpPolicyMIB page 77, t11FcSpSaMIB page 176, 7 page 232) > > > > - 3.2 page 11: HBAs -> Host Bus Adapters > > (usually abbrevs, including this one, should be > introduced by it is > > the only use) > > > > - 3.4.7 page 17: introduce abbrevs: SSB (Server Session Begin), SSE > > (Server Session End), SW_ILS (Switch Fabric Internal Link > Services); > > or extend them when they are used once in the introduction part: > > EACA -> Enhanced Acquire Change Authorization Request, ERCA -> > > Enhanced Release Change Authorization, SFC -> Stage Fabric > > Configuration > > > > - 4.9 page 25: the the -> the (and in > t11FcSpAuRejDirection page 58, > > don't believe you can get >240 pages without a typo :-) > > > > - 5 page 26: focussed -> focused? > > > > - t11FcSpAuIfStatOutAcceptedMsgs page 55: neighbouring -> > neighboring? > > > > - t11FcSpPoSwMembAuthBehaviour page 89: neighbour -> neighbor? > > (same in t11FcSpPoNaSwMembAuthBehaviour page 129 > > > > - t11FcSpPoSwConnAllowedNameType page 99: portname -> portName > > > > - t11FcSpSaIfTerminateAllSas page 183: outsanding -> outstanding > > > > Regards > > > > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > > _______________________________________________ Gen-art mailing list [email protected] https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
