I have been selected as the General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviewer for this draft (for background on Gen-ART, please see http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html).
Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may receive. Document: draft-ietf-tsvwg-admitted-realtime-dscp-05.txt Reviewer: Francis Dupont Review Date: 2008-11-19 IETF LC End Date: 2008-11-27 IESG Telechat date: unknown Summary: Ready Comments: I have minor editorial (== to be handled by default by the RFC Editor) concerns and proposals (ending by '?'): - ToC page 2: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments - 1 page 3: I suggest to introduce the EF (Expedited Forwarding) abbrev as soon as possible, i.e.: Expedited Forwarding -> Expedited Forwarding (EF) - 1 page 3: the CAC (Call Admission Control) abbrev must be introduced, i.e.: CAC -> Call Admission Control (CAC) - 1 page 3: I don't like "aka" (use "i.e.," in place of it, or no abbrev?) - 1 page 3: I'd like to get a reference for "e-911" - 1 page 3: e.g. -> e.g., - 1 page 3: the policy ... need -> the policy ... needs ? - 1 page 4: i.e. -> i.e., - 1.1 page 4 (PHB): introduce the DS (Differentiated Services) abbrev here? - 1.1 page 4: the not-introduced PSTN abbrev is questionable. IMHO you should keep it (common abbrev and not necessary for understanding). - 2.1 page 8: more questionable for SLA abbrev. - 2.1 page 8: conaining -> containing - 2.1 page 8: MBPS is *not* an acceptable unit (I propose Mbits/s) - 2.2 page 9: reployed -> deployed - 2.2 page 10: eg., -> e.g., - 2.3 page 10: AAA abbrev: questionable but IMHO should be kept. - 3 page 11: Video classes -> Video classes: ? - 6 page 12 (title): Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments - 6 page 12 (last character): , -> . Regards [EMAIL PROTECTED] _______________________________________________ Gen-art mailing list Gen-art@ietf.org https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
