Paul, thanks for your review. I have entered an ABSTAIN ballot on the basis of 
your major issue highlighted below.

Alissa


> On Jun 3, 2018, at 2:59 PM, Paul Kyzivat <[email protected]> wrote:
> 
> [[INCOMPLETE, NOT READY TO SEND. PLEASE IGNORE]]
> 
> I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review 
> Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for the 
> IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just like any other last call 
> comments. For more information, please see the FAQ at 
> <​http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
> 
> Document: draft-ietf-tsvwg-rfc4960-errata-06
> Reviewer: Paul Kyzivat
> Review Date: 2018-06-03
> IETF LC End Date: 2018-06-04
> IESG Telechat date: ?
> 
> Summary:
> 
> This draft is on the right track but has open issues, described in the review.
> 
> Issues:
> 
> Major: 1
> Minor: 2
> Nits:  1
> 
> 1) MAJOR:
> 
> The format of this document disturbs me. According to the abstract:
> 
>   ... This
>   document provides deltas to RFC4960 and is organized in a time
>   ordered way.  The issues are listed in the order they were brought
>   up.  Because some text is changed several times the last delta in the
>   text is the one which should be applied.
> 
> This format makes the document hard to deal with. A developer who wants to 
> implement sctp with some or all of the errata fixes will want to work from a 
> variant of 4960 that incorporates all of those fixes - a bis. But it isn't 
> clear how this document helps with that. I don't think you can start with 
> 4960 and simply apply all the deltas sequentially, because overlapping 
> changes won't work right.
> 
> A developer won't be interested in the order in which errata were reported. 
> An actual bis document would be more useful to a developer than this format. 
> Is that not being done because doing so would be more difficult? Or because 
> it isn't yet certain that these are the correct fixes?
> 
> I think you should give some serious consideration of the most suitable form 
> for this document, in the context of how it is intended to be used.
> 
> 2) MINOR (maybe MAJOR):
> 
> Discovering where one change is impacted by another change is hard.
> 
> I dug into the details of the document to understand how many places there 
> are actually overlaps between the changes in multiple sections. (It took a 
> lot of work to do this.) I found five of these:
> 
> - 3.1 / 3.23
> - 3.3 / 3.43
> - 3.5 / 3.10
> - 3.6 / 3.23
> - 3.24 / 3.32
> 
> (I don't guarantee that this list is exhaustive.)
> 
> Of these, I think only one (3.1/3.23) explicitly indicates the conflict, and 
> it only indicates it within 3.23.
> 
> Most of the changes don't have any conflicts. And some of the conflicts could 
> be removed by being more precise in indicating the change being made. In 
> cases where this isn't possible, the presence of the conflict should be 
> indicated in each section that has a conflict, with cross references. IOW, 
> shift the burden of detecting conflicts from the reader to the document.
> 
> 3) MINOR:
> 
> Errata Tracking: Apparently each subsection of section 3 covers one erratum. 
> But the errata numbers are not mentioned. Each section ought to reference the 
> errata number it responds to.
> 
> 4) NIT:
> 
> In section 3.35 (DSCP Changes) the change to section 10.1 isn't properly 
> indicated. It shows 'Old text' twice rather than 'Old text' and 'New text'.
> 
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