Absolutely brilliant, Francis. Thank you. On Thu, Apr 30, 2009 at 12:08 PM, frantheman <[email protected]> wrote: > > I could just quote your description back to you, Chris, and it would > also apply about 98% to me. I know that amazing feeling of falling > completely, unreservedly, in love where brain, belly and balls are all > focussed in just one direction. I think, for a good long-term > relationship, friendship (philos) must add itself to eros, if the > relationship is to have a chance. And respect, always respect - > something which isn't always easy to maintain when two people have > learned to know each other (including the weaknesses of the other) > really well. > > That said, I'm solo for nearly a year now, having spent most of my > adult life in two long-term relationships. As of now, I'm still > enjoying it, although I do think I would rather see a partnership > situation in the medium to long term. Still, I certainly haven't > reached the stage where I actively go looking for it. Indeed, my > personal story has always been that serious relationships have started > out of normal, everyday encounters. But I've been lucky in that the > cataclysmic break-up of my last relationship early last summer > coincided with the move of my 17-year old daughter, who had been > living with her mother abroad since we broke up twelve years ago (so > that we could only see each other a couple of times a year for over a > decade), to live with me. So loneliness hasn't been a negative factor, > and we have a very good, harmonious relationship - the more so, > because we both had to work hard to sustain the relationship over the > years. > > Writing this, it strikes me how deeply important the love I have for > my daughters (and theirs for me) is in my life. And my love for my > parents (even if my relationship with my father was characterised by > tension for many years). I feel very privileged in this regard, as I > know that being able to see one's experience of family (even "broken" > family in the case of my ex-wife and our children) as positive is > anything but inevitable - and should anyone question this, they should > just go and read gruff's story. The older I get, the more I value the > basic human unit of family as a source of dependable love (even if > families can also be theatres of incredible hurt and cruelty) - > something I certainly woudn't have said when I was in my early > twenties. > > And then, there are also good friends, and brothers and sisters ... > Thinking about it, I live in a sea of love. > > ... > > "Amor vincit omnia" is not a phrase I would categorically affirm. Yet > I can still say, yes, I believe in love. > > Francis > > On 30 Apr., 04:31, Chris Jenkins <[email protected]> wrote: >> And no,this isn't a wide open generic question. I'm not interested in agape >> here, this is strictly for eros. >> >> I'm a hopeless romantic and serial monogamist. I fall in love hard and >> quickly if I find someone worthy of such, put my all Into maintaining long >> term romantic relationships, despite my personal challenges, and against all >> logic remain a believer in the concept of a happily ever after relationship >> despite a spotty relationship record and a generally rational to cynical >> worldview on every other topic. Love is such a basic human instinct to me. >> >> Perspectives on Love vary drastically though, and I've heard a surprisingly >> diverse number of them recently. So, I'm putting the question out to each of >> you, not as a debate, but as an invitation to expound what your perception >> of the nature of Love is, in your life. There are no wrong answers, so have >> at it. > > >
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