Funny, Allan! I do remember some similar experiences and love the innocent wonder of children. The nuns never forgot me! :-)
On Jul 14, 1:07�pm, iam deheretic <[email protected]> wrote: > Occasionally I get an email worth passing on, I hope you enjoy it as much as > I did. > > �Why do we love children? > *1) NUDITY* > I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a > woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark > naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the > back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!' > * > 2) OPINIONS* > On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from > his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not > necessarily those of his parents.' > * > 3) KETCHUP* > A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her > struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the > phone 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting > the bottle.' > * > 4) MORE NUDITY* > A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker > room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing > towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then > asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?' > * > 5) POLICE # 1* > While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was > interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my > uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop? Yes,' I answered and continued writing > the report. My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police.. > Is that right?' 'Yes, that's right,' I told her. 'Well, then,' she said as > she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?' > > *6) POLICE # 2* > It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the > station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and > I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he > asked. > 'It sure is,' I replied. > Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally > he said, 'What'd he do?' > > *7) ELDERLY* > While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, > I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was > unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the > canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of > false teeth soaking in a glass As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage > of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never > believe this!'* > > 8) DRESS-UP* > A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her > dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, 'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.' > 'And why not, darling?' > 'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.'* > > 9) DEATH* > While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard > the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his > 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper > burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, > then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. > The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with > sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always > said: 'Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he > goooes.'* (I want this line used at my funeral!)** > > 10) SCHOOL* > A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting > my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they > won't let me talk!'* > > 11) BIBLE* > A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered > through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked > up the object and looked at it.. What he saw was an old leaf that had been > pressed in between the pages. > 'Mama, look what I found,' the boy called out. > 'What have you got there, dear?' > With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's > Adam's underwear!' > > NOW IF THIS DIDN'T BRIGHTEN YOUR DAY, GO BACK TO BED AND FORGET IT. > > -- > ( > �) > I_D Allan --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups ""Minds Eye"" group. To post to this group, send email to [email protected] To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [email protected] For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/Minds-Eye?hl=en -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
